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[✗] Aarakocra


Phoenixshot3
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Ooc explanation:

 

This idea came from me and A friend who wanted to start our own order, as we thought about special features for the order when we came up with this.

 

Story:

 

aarakocra.jpg

 

As the darkness consumed the ruins and the moon was covered by a thick  curtain of clouds a Dark silhouet arose in front of the stone table. The three adventurers, slightly surprised, made their move on the Dark figure. As they surrounded the man while muttering prayers the shadow started to laugh. The three heroes were pinned to the ground as Old rotten hands grasped their feet. 

 

While the black figure opened his arms as he set one foot towards A trapped human. The woman screamed as the hands started tearing the flesh from her bones. “You will serve me Well.” It said while the hands started grabbing their upper legs.

 

A screech answered the painful screaming. As something started circle around the Old Temple with an incredible speed. Then all of a sudden it stopped and looked straight at the Dark sorcerer. Two Sulfur tinted eyes stared straight through the night, as if it saw through the Dark figure’s soul. The sorcerer fired dozens of spells at the Unknown beast but missed every time.

 

It started screaming into the night, threatening the monster when it showed its eyes again. Everyone could see That the long black robes started shivering as the undead flesh slowly started to lose strenght. The creature screamed once more, but the man couldn’t answer this intimidating sound as another Shape fell from the skies and stuck A Spear straight through his skull, all the way down into his stumach.

 

The adventurers watched the corpse hit the ground in fear. The beast would look around the ruins from under his cowl and spread its huge wings once more. It flew back into the dark night, and the two eyes dissapeared in the woods.

 

Creation:

 

The Aarakocra were not always birdlike humanoids, First they were men and women from all other races. Most of them were exiles looking for a place to stay, as they were found by one elf ranger who wished to do good for others.  As he gathered more men he decided to create his own order. He trained the exiles So they could help him protect the innocents, revealing their intentions to the people.

 

One day they found A strange white stag with silver horns that would cassualy walk into their gardens and wander around. When the creature entered the garden however, all the plants around him started to blossom. 

 

The elven hunter was fascinated by the creature and when the stag would walk up to the garden he would carefully watch it walk around. He started to place down small offerings for the majestic creature, it was clearly satisfied with the attention and kept playing visits every month.

 

However one of the younger hunters wanted to trap the creature So the plants would stay in blossom. But when the stag was captured, it started to smash its cage on every side. The proud boy presented its prey in their guild hall but Everyone looked in despair as the animal tried to fight its way out of the cage. 

 

The boy was banished for what he did but he demanded the skin of its prey. when he cut the stag and the blood started flowing over the town halls the Horns catched fire. As of then, al the people started to turn into feathered monsters. Their feathers would grow out of their skin and their mouths would turn into big beaks.

 

The spirit of the stag stood over his body and spoke to the people. “You took my body as a trophy, like animals. Then I will turn you into animals. From now on only the hunt will silene your soul.” Since then the Aarakocra became the feral hunters of A nature spirit, as they must exterminate the darkness to apease their master.

 

After A few years the spirit was satisfied by the deeds his minions have done and decided to forfeit their contract as eternal hunters. Now Some still worship the nature spirit as A sign of loyalty to their creator.

 

Appearance:

 

Aarakocra2.jpg

 

Most of these creatures are wingless as they aren’t seen as true hunters, Most of their leaders however are blessed with this gift and are allowed to pass it over to the worthy.

 

Aarakocra can be sorted in four differen types:

 

-The Acoro Is blessed with the knowledge and wisdom of an owl, they tend to wear robes as most of them are either mages, priests or scholars. These Aarakocra are not very strong and Sometimes tend to get too attached to their books.

 

-The Analoi are the fiercest of them all, as they share characteristics with a strong eagle, these creatures are the strongest so most of them dedicate themselves to combat. As they may be strong they have a lot of pride So if they Get angry they are most likely to pick A fight.

 

-The Nulac tends to turn his mind to money as their black raven feathers are perfect for sneaking around at night or show of in performances, they make good performers, traders and Thieves. But their obsession for gold is often very unhealthy.

 

-Icirai are agile and precise, their keen hawk eyes make them perfect archers, Icirai Also have a fair amount of strength. Lots of hawkfolk live between other races as they love a good Conversation. However they hate to be alone and often put faith in the wrong people.

 

Language:

 

While there are different types of featherfolk, they all speak the same language. The only difference lies in the way they speak it:

 

-Analoi and Icirai speak very screeching as the letter “A” is most common in their Dialect.

 

-Acoro have a more polite way of speech as they use common language A lot but instead of “O” they  use “OE”. 

 

-Nulac often drops the letter “E” At the end of a word and add“Aah” to it.

 

Other traits:

 

-All Aarakocra have Sharp nails on their toes and hands which do grow back if they would ever break.

 

-Featherfolk communicate with eachother by either screeching or using the dialects mentioned before.

 

-Men are often darker colored while women are more likely to have light feathers.

 

-As predators they like to eat meat and fish but they won’t say no to any fruits or vegtables.

 

-They can communicate with birds of their own species.

 

Procreation:

animal-facts-5.jpg

 

As featherfolk  shares the characteristics of both birds and zoatier you could argue about How A baby is Born. Featherfolk lay eggs as it is in their primal genes.

 

Red lines:

 

-Wings can only be granted By the inner circle, as Aarakocra aren’t Born with them.

 

-Featherfolk are unable to perform any type of Dark magic as their kind is sword against it.

 

-They can ONLY communicate with birds of their own kind, no other animals.

 

-Their feathers reach over their whole body (so no half human nudist stuff)

 

-Featherfolk CAN procreate with other races but That child will either be fully Aarakocra Or fully human (for example).

 

-The colors of An Aarakocra are natural, unless the player is an Icirai and takes A blood oath for the inner circle, then he may change into A bloodhawk.

 

 

 

 

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First, not to be that guy, but I see several issues.

 

A. There's lots of spelling, capitalization errors, and grammar errors. Might want to run it through a Google Doc or spell checker. 

 

B. We already have two animal races, the Hou-zi, and the Kha's. Both of which are suffering from low player counts. I'm not how popular this race would be.

 

 

 

"As the darkness consumed the ruins and the moon was covered by a thick  curtain of clouds a Dark silhouet arose in front of the stone table. The three adventurers, slightly surprised, made their move on the Dark figure. As they surrounded the man while muttering prayers the shadow started to laugh. The three heroes were pinned to the ground as Old rotten hands grasped their feet. 

 

While the black figure opened his arms as he set one foot towards A trapped human. The woman screamed as the hands started tearing the flesh from her bones. “You will serve me Well.” It said while the hands started grabbing their upper legs."

 

The magic described here is confusing. It speaks of rotten hands grabbing their feet which is necromancy, but necromancer's cannot instantly spawn minions. You would need to change this to have a minion, a ghoul or craven, to be present. 

 

"A screech answered the painful screaming. As something started circle around the Old Temple with an incredible speed. Then all of a sudden it stopped and looked straight at the Dark sorcerer. Two Sulfur tinted eyes stared straight through the night, as if it saw through the Dark figure’s soul. The sorcerer fired dozens of spells at the Unknown beast but missed every time."

 

Describes powergaming to the fullest. Mage's cannot run at those speeds, nor can fire 12 spells at once. They most they can do, even at t5, is a couple.

 

The Aarakocra were not always birdlike humanoids, First they were men and women from all other races. Most of them were exiles looking for a place to stay, as they were found by one elf ranger who wished to do good for others.  As he gathered more men he decided to create his own order. He trained the exiles So they could help him protect the innocents, revealing their intentions to the people.

 

Why are they exiles? What did they do? The Elves only exile Elves if their Voidal Mages or if they break the laws. Expanding on why they all are exiles would be wonderful.

 

 

One day they found A strange white stag with silver horns that would cassualy walk into their gardens and wander around. When the creature entered the garden however, all the plants around him started to blossom. 

 

The elven hunter was fascinated by the creature and when the stag would walk up to the garden he would carefully watch it walk around. He started to place down small offerings for the majestic creature, it was clearly satisfied with the attention and kept playing visits every month.

 

Sounds suispoiusly like Cennous, God of the Hunt, and a diety in the Aspect faith, which is the main Wood Elven faith. You would need to clear their permission to use The Aspects to create another creature.

 

-The Acoro Is blessed with the knowledge and wisdom of an owl, they tend to wear robes as most of them are either mages, priests or scholars. These Aarakocra are not very strong and Sometimes tend to get too attached to their books.

 

But if their blessed by Cennous, he hates Voidal Mages and people who cannot fight for themselves. This doesn't make too much sense. I would change this simply to them being smart, and edit out the mages.

 

-The Nulac tends to turn his mind to money as their black raven feathers are perfect for sneaking around at night or show of in performances, they make good performers, traders and Thieves. But their obsession for gold is often very unhealthy.

 

Again, if the basis is Elves and Cennous, this wouldn't make a lot of sense as the diety doesn't preffer material wealth. 

 

-Wings can only be granted By the inner circle, as Aarakocra aren’t Born with them.

 

I don't see this being accepted, maybe in the case of a super special player, but I'll leave that up to staff.

 

-Featherfolk CAN procreate with other races but That child will either be fully Aarakocra Or fully human (for example).

 

Beastality is against the rules, and since these are beasts, these creatures will be unable to prcreate with anybody besides their own kind.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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I am sorry dude, but I don’t think this will be accepted. I’m not sure how long you have been on the server, but these kinda cryptic things don’t work like that. 

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I have been on the server for a couple of weeks no, and this is the First time I wrote any lore So no Need to be sorry. I was Just experimenting on it however I would like to know what “kind” of things you mean.

so I can work on it for when I post anything else.

Edited by Phoenixshot3
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Thank you for submitting your piece, it is now under review. A verdict shall be given in 2 weeks, give or take.

 

Thread is being locked to prevent sneak edits to the lore while voting occurs. If you have feedback regarding the lore that you wish to pass to the LT, feel free to toss me a PM.

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This Lore has been denied. Our bar for new races are rather high and this piece does not meet that standard (e.g. see the amount that was written for the hou-zi). Plus the name and some other aspects seem ripped right out of D&D’s 5e.

 

Topic moved to Denied Lore forum.

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