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[✗] [Deity] Zarelek, the Empty Lord


TheDragonsRoost
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9 hours ago, Farryn said:

To those stating that Dragon is posting his lore for his own gain - pause for a moment and think; are you actually correct there? Do you genuinely believe you are in the right? Because where you see someone apparently wanting a new fancy magic for himself, I see a writer who seeks to try and incorporate an interesting factor onto the server by thinking out of the box and also to share his writing with everyone else. TheDragonRoost has worked hard on this lore since the day I met him a few months ago, and honestly - he has never come across as someone wanting power or an advantage for his character. I'm a writer and TheDragonRoost's passion for writing, whenever it be short story writing or lore writing, is something I truly admire.

 

So who are all of you to judge that he's in it for the power and comment on this post, especially when some of you openly admitted you didn't read the lore and barely provided any criticism or feedback in a more professional manner? Yes, his concept may sound stupid to you, but does that give you the right to simply skip it and go "You're in it for the power and self-gain!"

 

To simply put it - get a grip and provide some actual criticism and read the lore TheDragonRoost actually went out of his way to write this post yet there are those of you who think "Eh, don't give a flick" and just post a comment that holds no relevance or feedback. The posts I'm seeing haven't been providing feedback and have just been flat out disgusting with the insulting and lack of care. So keep any unnecessary comments out of here if they're providing no feedback to the writer, positive or negative alike. Right now, you're just being disgraceful for taking it on yourselves to completely disregard posting any feedback on a lore submission, where players give their personal feedback to the lore writers.

 

Hyena - I'm calling you out. No one cares about your comment about how this lore is none other than that it's TheDragonRoost's apparent attempt to claim power or magic. As well as anyone else who's considering writing what something along those lines. If you believe this lore is not worth reading but still want to be a hypocritical disrespecting individual, then kindly do not even comment on this post at all and allow those who actually want to give feedback to do it.

 

----

 

Now.

@TheDragonsRoost - I read your lore and I've got both positive and negative feedback to give to you (seeing how folks so far haven't gone out of their way to read the lore and back up their claims).

 

A unique intake in dark magic as it's providing a more morally-okayish magic, compared to the all out or near dark magics. Furthermore, an Aengudaemon that revolves around dark magic? I know we have Iblees and the Ithuzuki (can't remember the spelling correctly) patron, but it does create a form of balance between the more light/good based Aengudaemons and the more darker ones. Plus, the lore itself does expand into more interesting areas that aren't really explored upon in LotC. Lastly, the lore itself is very well written, neat to read, and simple and to the point, but also provides enough necessary details regarding the Aengudaemon, how they think and act, and what they seek to do by influencing the mortal realm.

 

Feedback points

Now. I am a bit curious if you've been told by the LT, but you do need to post the full lore. Not just a bit here and leave the rest on a google doc. It's so that the lore is fully on the forums and cannot be edited, preventing any lore writers from making sudden edits to their lore without the LT knowing. Plus, the google doc is rather easy to miss, meaning many who read this may not read the full extension of the lore. It really helps people out if things are more organised.

 

I am also curious about Zarelek's realm - how does it appear? I know you briefly mentioned it but having a paragraph in detail explaining the realm would provide more insight to the Aengudaemon, and does help out builders if this lore is accepted and the Aengudaemon becomes used.

 

Lastly, I recommend looking up and reading more on lore in general. It'll really help you out in writing lore further, as well as help you to keep a sense of continuity with the server's basic lores. This includes the Aengudaemonic lore, magic lore, etc, etc. I can say that there are some areas that do need fixing so that this Aengudaemon is more suitable for the server, though that's pretty much the feedback I have to offer.

 

Hopefully this helps! And good work on the writing!

Thanks @Farryn for posting this as I enjoyed reading your reply! I hope to provide more submissions like this in the future.

8 hours ago, Delmodan said:

@TheDragonsRoost  Hello, Delmo here. One of the LT managers. I’m posting to inform you that you need to place the complete lore on the thread itself as that is what the team goes by when we review the lore. Google docs are fine to place as well, but isn’t something we consider canon. 

@Delmodan I will be adding more information to the Deity, rest assured. It was close to 2am PST when I submitted this so I couldn’t think of more than what you have read. Thank you for letting me know of how you process lore submissions though!

8 hours ago, Narthok said:

Where does this character fit in amongst the Divine Pantheon? Is it an Aengul / Daemon? An aspect? A spirit?

I’m honestly not sure, @Narthok on his exact placement within the Divine Pantheon. I just consider him a deity.

8 hours ago, Luv said:

Honestly, I like you kid. I’m nothing but a mouth breathing crossdresser so, take my words with a grain of salt if you wish!

 

The idea and lore behind your magic aren’t BAD. Allow me to preface my statements with that. I like the idea of a more antagonistic and EVIL dark magic and community as we currently have the Shades who prefer teatime roleplay, the witches and necromancers who prefer not logging on, and the mystics who just genuinely avoid conflict. Are ALL of these bad? No, but when it comes to the idea of DARK MAGIC you usually think of an antagonistic evil force, right?

 

My first suggestion would be to message this guy, I’ll swallow my pride and take back my further statements. He can really help you out here.

 

Secondly, I agree with a lot of the questions Farryn rose and I’m genuinely curious myself. Where did his realm come from and how does it appear? What exactly is Shadow and Oblivion magic along with their specific abilities? If you need help with making these two magics unique please feel free to message me. As a community deemed magic collector, I know just about all the ins and outs of most magics and their specific abilities. What is this deity’s purpose or goal? What does he stand for in terms of his actual belief system? Is he a Daemon / Anguel or some sort of beefy Shamanistic Spirit? 

 

Finally, the people who are stating you’re doing this for personal gain... I don’t know you too well, and I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt in believing that is not your intention. I’ll agree with Farryn once more. Further outline how this may be used as more of a dark deifiic magic, as I believe that was the intention, with benefits for its followers and make sure to avoid pyramid scheme ideas. 

 

Good luck!

@Luv Though I do appreciate the sentiment, one of the magics (Shadow Magic) is not my own idea. That honor belongs to @Melkor__ as I had worked on his Shadow Magic project as a writer of his lore for the magic and he cancelled that project as the original deity for it did not seem to fit or couldn’t be used at all. I created this deity to work for Melkor’s Shadow Magic and for my own Oblivion Magic submissions as I hope to submit the magic that I hope gives LotC more flavor and more life to it.

 

As for all other comments, please refrain from giving truly non-constructive criticism as Keefy mentioned in his reply. I’d like to say this in the long run: “If you do not have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

Also, there will be an extension of the present lore as I do not mind expanding more on your curious questions, though that will take some time to fully write out!
Thank you @Farryn, @Luv, @Melkor__, and @Delmodan for your lovely replies as well to those who offered good pointers on what to do with my deity lore!

-TheDragonsRoost

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9 hours ago, Keefy said:

We understand that there are mixed feelings on this post but please.

Keep it civil guys.

 

Nonconstructive comments and toxic posts will be hidden.

Thank you- FM Team.

I was unware that responses to lore submissions had to be constructive. You should go hide the rest of my replies on lore posts Keef. Sick of this hugbox.

 

That being said. As my other replies were hidden. Once again, -1.

I don’t like your lore, it is literally elder scrolls meets runescape. You have some potential in writing but as I believe I said last time, how does this work with lotc lore? And again, I do believe you’re trying to garner power for yourself due to the short story pertaining to the empty lord you wrote a while back. I was also wondering how exactly does the empty lord get rid of soul trees? How will the people with his magics be chosen, by you or someone else? As Narthok said, how does he fit in with the other angels/demons? Oh. Scrolled up. You said you don’t know, but...I think its an important thing to know these things beforehand. IDK, maybe it’s just me (oh god watch this be deemed toxic again), but I’d like to know how new lore pieces would mesh into old lore pieces as well, you feel? Would definitely recommend you take grim up on his offer to work with you, man seems knowledgeable.

Edited by Hyena
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Original content of this message has been edited into the original post as part of its extended lore.

Edited by TheDragonsRoost
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8 hours ago, ZachoSnacko said:

Drfate back again. As said before im glad you’ve given somewhat actual feedback, but do know that the REASON people have tenets is so that they can be followed and provide a guidelines to a character. That is some of the appeal of most if not all ‘holy’ magics. Will they be broken and provide some interesting RP POSSIBLY? Yeah, is he or anyone else going to be playing the deity aside from the LT? No, because no Ascended, Cleric, Paladin, Druid, Shaman, dark mage, etc  should be playing a god, and if they are then they are about to get the axe I’m sure. So before you go around assuming assholeish things of a person who is trying to open to new avenues and not keep in the single-minded way of magic that we have on lotc ; please reconsider and actually give feedback that can help improve it, or state that you don’t think it belongs at all. The entire response to his lore seems nothing but toxic frankly.


Onto actual feedback.

First off I want to say the writing itself is actually quite nice and it feels good to read. Does it need work and/or is missing lore? It seems so. The abilities listed are undefined and need definite red lines and abilities, but with work it could be fixed.

 

Zacho, you’ve never had Necromancy before. You know nothing of Tenets and disconnection/clotting nor do you realize that he could of written the lore without the intent of power hoarding but will likely end up doing just that once people he dislikes obtain the magic. Magic on LoTC is full of stupid restrictions and “guidelines” are one of those restrictions. Tenets are mean’t to be broken and they’re not suppose to be easily punished for breaking them. Nagash in Warhammer broke every single tenet in the Nehekkaran religion and he never paid the full price.. In fact he ate Usirian. The same can be said in LoTC, deity’s aren’t immortal boundless beings and are in fact mortal. The only reason we haven’t killed Aeriel or Xan yet is because the LT won’t allow the means of doing so to occur and won’t allow players to do it.

21 minutes ago, TheDragonsRoost said:

 

 

Please ask the LT or someone to just edit this into the thread.

 

Also please read what I told Zacho concerning tenets and disconnection. Remove them. For once, have a deity that truly does not give a damn and has no moral restrictions behind it.

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16 minutes ago, drfate786 said:

The only reason we haven’t killed Aeriel or Xan yet is because the LT won’t allow the means of doing so to occur and won’t allow players to do it.

 

Someone pinch me I am agreeing with fate on something. Even after someone finding a way to put a being into a deities world with the intent to attack them, it was played out like some sort of Word of Warcraft cinematic rip-off where they get so close but ultimately was met with a ‘ha ha puny mortal you thought you could harm me?!’ type of ****. RIP Jackal, you shall be missed.

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47 minutes ago, Sky said:

 

Someone pinch me I am agreeing with fate on something. Even after someone finding a way to put a being into a deities world with the intent to attack them, it was played out like some sort of Word of Warcraft cinematic rip-off where they get so close but ultimately was met with a ‘ha ha puny mortal you thought you could harm me?!’ type of ****. RIP Jackal, you shall be missed.

 

Yeah, it’s a big issue and needs to be addressed. We need lore that allows for deities to be created and eventually destroyed, nothing lives forever. Surprisingly, the only game I've ever seen do this correctly is God of War and Runescape’s “gods” where they at one point were mortal but acquired so much power that they ascended to godhood only to eventually die like all things should.

 

Edit: 

 

Wouldn’t it be interesting if tenets were created by deities due to the risk that their agents would go rogue and turn on them? Maybe if an Ascended went rogue they could become parasites on the deity and leech it of it’s power.

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15 minutes ago, drfate786 said:

 

Yeah, it’s a big issue and needs to be addressed. We need lore that allows for deities to be created and eventually destroyed, nothing lives forever. Surprisingly, the only game I've ever seen do this correctly is God of War and Runescape’s “gods” where they at one point were mortal but acquired so much power that they ascended to godhood only to eventually die like all things should.

 

Edit: 

 

Wouldn’t it be interesting if tenets were created by deities due to the risk that their agents would go rogue and turn on them? Maybe if an Ascended went rogue they could become parasites on the deity and leech it of it’s power.

Thats actually one of the main concepts of this deity. He knows that people would abuse his power so he introduces Edictian laws that would prevent Descendants from abusing his gift of Oblivion Magic and other such magics.

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Alright, I’m not going to sit here and absolutely bombard you with the accusation that you’re only making this to have your own special magic. I hope to god you’ve grown from when you sat in Haelun’or and spammed me in game to teach you magic and said you were entitled to it. Which makes me believe what others say that you just want your snowflake rp. If thats the case and this gets passed then we’ll definitely be able to see it by how you treat it when the time comes. Until then I’m gonna give a wait and see attitude.

 

As for the lore itself I think its mostly fine, some things are questionable and really leave a lot of questions unanswered that really shouldn’t just go unanswered. My main issue is that this just seems like it’ll just be thrown into the current lore with no rhyme or reason. It doesn’t fit at all with the current deities tones and themes. 

On 10/13/2018 at 5:38 PM, TheDragonsRoost said:

I’m honestly not sure, @Narthok on his exact placement within the Divine Pantheon. I just consider him a deity.

I really despise your reply here. As it shows that you have no real care for how this lore piece meshes with others. You just wrote it because you need it for your special magic. It’s almost just spitting in the face of the way gods and deities are handled in current lore. You need to rethink this over, because in my opinion you just throwing a new deity into the lore pitch like a car heading 100mph down a highway is a recipe for disaster. 

 

No hate for you (besides your attitude towards other players) but fix your lore if you want it in. -1

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9 hours ago, Its_Just_Leap said:

Alright, I’m not going to sit here and absolutely bombard you with the accusation that you’re only making this to have your own special magic. I hope to god you’ve grown from when you sat in Haelun’or and spammed me in game to teach you magic and said you were entitled to it. Which makes me believe what others say that you just want your snowflake rp. If thats the case and this gets passed then we’ll definitely be able to see it by how you treat it when the time comes. Until then I’m gonna give a wait and see attitude.

 

As for the lore itself I think its mostly fine, some things are questionable and really leave a lot of questions unanswered that really shouldn’t just go unanswered. My main issue is that this just seems like it’ll just be thrown into the current lore with no rhyme or reason. It doesn’t fit at all with the current deities tones and themes. 

I really despise your reply here. As it shows that you have no real care for how this lore piece meshes with others. You just wrote it because you need it for your special magic. It’s almost just spitting in the face of the way gods and deities are handled in current lore. You need to rethink this over, because in my opinion you just throwing a new deity into the lore pitch like a car heading 100mph down a highway is a recipe for disaster. 

 

No hate for you (besides your attitude towards other players) but fix your lore if you want it in. -1

The point of this deity is to allow for adaptability and to help create a fun story arc. Not just for special magic to exist, but again, the whole point is adaptability and for fun roleplay to be created.

Besides, I posted that reply before I talked to Quavinir, who was kind enough to tell me that the deity I’ve created is a Greater Deity as Iblees had even feared him enough to curse him with a banishing curse. Now, the deity exists as a being still trapped within his own realm, but now there are more ways to interact with this deity alone and to even gain historical knowledge of ages long since past and even to gain new herbs that can create drinks that can heal or kill the inflicted.

Essentially, I’m not just creating a new deity. I’m making a deity and relevant content to go along with the god.

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Now I myself aint a very experienced player so feedback isnt something i can give (only been around since early Atlas), however while it does have a few things missing and a few questions to be answered. I can say this is very interesting and a good read as someone who likes to read lore.

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6 hours ago, TheDragonsRoost said:

The point of this deity is to allow for adaptability and to help create a fun story arc. Not just for special magic to exist, but again, the whole point is adaptability and for fun roleplay to be created.

Besides, I posted that reply before I talked to Quavinir, who was kind enough to tell me that the deity I’ve created is a Greater Deity as Iblees had even feared him enough to curse him with a banishing curse. Now, the deity exists as a being still trapped within his own realm, but now there are more ways to interact with this deity alone and to even gain historical knowledge of ages long since past and even to gain new herbs that can create drinks that can heal or kill the inflicted.

Essentially, I’m not just creating a new deity. I’m making a deity and relevant content to go along with the god.

 

I tried this, the lore got denied because it was “antag” lore. This is “Protag” lore by that definition and should be denied for the same reason the Gyloth lore was denied last map. Making content isn’t good enough for the LT nowadays, they will threaten you with blacklists and deny every single lore thread you post if you’re intention is to create enjoyable content. Why? Because it breaks lore.

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41 minutes ago, drfate786 said:

 

I tried this, the lore got denied because it was “antag” lore. This is “Protag” lore by that definition and should be denied for the same reason the Gyloth lore was denied last map. Making content isn’t good enough for the LT nowadays, they will threaten you with blacklists and deny every single lore thread you post if you’re intention is to create enjoyable content. Why? Because it breaks lore.

That won’t stop me from what I enjoy doing. The saddest thing that I’m seeing so far is that people are unwilling to accept new lore that aims to provide the players with new and exciting content, even with 7.0 on the way.

(Sorry for the short reply, but its 10pm and I just woke up.)

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-Rep I wouldn’t want TheDragonsRoost to make lore for this server. Now I know nothing about making lore, but TheDragonsRoost does not follow server rules. His persona(Karren Mrysta) was pked now I know in a week(7 days) you can reverse it, but his persona committed suicide. If I recall LOTC rules state that you can NOT bring back a persona that committed suicide.

§3.13     If you permanently kill your character, you have 7 days to reverse your decision.

○      Unless by suicide or a lore enforced PK clause. See next rule for clarification.

§3.14     Death by suicide is non-reversible, unless specific lore states otherwise.

○      This includes suicidal intentions. Accidental suicide does not count; for example unknowingly drinking a toxin 

Later that day he reversed it.

image.thumb.png.bdc9083aca83c74d5a73102510a91615.png

 

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1 hour ago, System_K1LL3r said:

-Rep I wouldn’t want TheDragonsRoost to make lore for this server. Now I know nothing about making lore, but TheDragonsRoost does not follow server rules. His persona(Karren Mrysta) was pked now I know in a week(7 days) you can reverse it, but his persona committed suicide. If I recall LOTC rules state that you can NOT bring back a persona that committed suicide.

§3.13     If you permanently kill your character, you have 7 days to reverse your decision.

○      Unless by suicide or a lore enforced PK clause. See next rule for clarification.

§3.14     Death by suicide is non-reversible, unless specific lore states otherwise.

○      This includes suicidal intentions. Accidental suicide does not count; for example unknowingly drinking a toxin 

Later that day he reversed it.

image.thumb.png.bdc9083aca83c74d5a73102510a91615.png

 

This was stated by Knox (prior to his depature from admin) that I broke no rules in this situation and I also talked to Toxcat on this matter as well. They said at the time that I can reverse the pk due to Stasis Lock being a “cliffhanger” and so, there were no rules that said I could not reverse the pk due to this.


EDIT: You forgot to mention that “Breaking the Stasis” story as well. Very convenient to try and do a -1 rep on a deity lore submission....

 


And this is also a deity lore submission. Please do not bring up persona pk events when they have already been settled with by admins and other staff members. Thank you.

Edited by TheDragonsRoost
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