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NotEvilAtAll

Change in Knoxist Dogma!

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Spoiler

 

[!] A few flyers are sent hurtling through the wind wherever halflings live, as well as one permanently nailed to the Dunshire Noticeboard

Official Change in Knoxist Dogma!

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~The Great Pumpkin Shark, ArkaKnox, as seen in the glorious realm where all halfling souls go to rest~

But a handful of Elven Days ago, all of us wee halflin’s went on a glorious journey to Lord Knox’s realm only ter realize that Lord Knox is actualleh a massive shark named ArkaKnox! He lives in a massive realm of never-ending wheat fields eternally being harvested and replanted by pumpkins animated with the spirits of Halfling souls. 

 

It had been theorized that the afterlife was ah eternal wheat field in the sky since Pendlemere, and when we all journeyed ter the realm of Knox’s Harvest Spirits, we saw just that! This is clear proof of the validiteh of the Knoxist religion (which now adds Arka- before Knox as per ArkaKnox’s request)!

 

The newleh discovered Harvest Spirits of the (Arka)Knoxist faith are...

ArkaKnox: Harvest Spirit of the Pumpkins, who’s shark body spawns pumpkins wherever he swims through the soil!

Arwa: Harvest Spirit of Hay and Fertility who helps the Halfling souls tend to the eternal wheatfields!

Ralaphzet: Harvest Spirit of Windmills, who demands that every Halfling windmill be named after him!

 

Praised be ArkaKnox, Arwa, and Ralaphzet! May Dunshire Life Long and Prosper!

-Daisy Applefoot, High Pumplar of Dunshire, leader of the Knoxist (now ArkaKnoxist) faith

[!] The paper ends with the Dunshire Rabbit, official seal of Dunshire

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Edited by NotEvilAtAll

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”THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! For Years, YEARS The Smolfoot family has followed Knoxism, This is pure blasphemy created by the Liberaling conservatives, Down with this..this..hypocrisy!” Shouts Trisha Smolfoot, Dressed in Uniform of The Halfling Union. 

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Just now, Nafari said:

”THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! For Years, YEARS The Smolfoot family has followed Knoxism, This is pure blasphemy created by the Liberaling conservatives, Down with this..this..hypocrisy!” Shouts Trisha Smolfoot, Dressed in Uniform of The Halfling Union. 

 

Rollo Applefoot wonders when another woman joined Dunshire.

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12 minutes ago, Nafari said:

”THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! For Years, YEARS The Smolfoot family has followed Knoxism, This is pure blasphemy created by the Liberaling conservatives, Down with this..this..hypocrisy!” Shouts Trisha Smolfoot, Dressed in Uniform of The Halfling Union. 

“Oi’m sorreh, bu’ t’is all be compa’ible wi’ our previous beliefs. T’is jus’ ah ex’ension o’ t’eh religion now tha’ we know more abou’ ArkaKnox.” replies Daisy Applefoot, the leader of the Knoxist faith in Dunshire.

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“shut up.” Wither says, remembering Knox from her youth.

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"Why are the halfmen forming unions" Conan asks, confused. "can they even do that?" he says, flipping through a guideline book.

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“Why have the halflings become so EDGY, they no longer act like halflings!”” said Ted.

((For real though, I would join the halfling if you acted like ******* halflings and not edgy elves. Halflings are sadly not what they once were.))

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1 minute ago, ImperialTortoise said:

“Why have the halflings become so EDGY, they no longer act like halflings!”” said Ted.

((For real though, I would join the halfling if you acted like ******* halflings and not edgy elves. Halflings are sadly not what they once were.))

 

What do you mean? Halflings for a very long time, since at least Anthos have worshipped The Pumpkin Lord Knox – Who happened to be a serial killer.

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7 minutes ago, Sky said:

What do you mean? Halflings for a very long time, since at least Anthos have worshipped The Pumpkin Lord Knox – Who happened to be a serial killer.

((I know that, nobody acknowledged him to be a serial killer, all this **** about becoming a political party, joining the GA, forming a soviet-style party, changing knoxism to this edgy ****, trying to form a parliament in the halfling village.

“WHAT???? T’ey cu’ ‘is ‘ead off? Tha’s OU’RAGEOUS!” Daisy Applefoot the Halfling would cry out

 

”Clearleh t’ey should’ve chopped off more o’ ‘is bodeh as well! Ye go’ ter make sure ‘e cannae come back as ah ‘eadless zombie! Once t’eh arms ‘n legs are removed t’eh threa’s o’ foul Necromancy decreases sigifican’leh!” “

 

The halflings have veered off what they should be.))

Edited by ImperialTortoise

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Hekkaes 'Anvilaxe' Goldhand would wonder if he can supply a haflling religious revolution against the strange religion.

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3 hours ago, ImperialTortoise said:

“Why have the halflings become so EDGY, they no longer act like halflings!”” said Ted.

((For real though, I would join the halfling if you acted like ******* halflings and not edgy elves. Halflings are sadly not what they once were.))

((I hate to tell this to you, but everything in this new Knoxist Dogma was learned in a very serious Spirit Walk led by @_Jandy_ that had 6 Halflings participating and 9 Halflings rallied for the event at its peak.

3 hours ago, ImperialTortoise said:

((I know that, nobody acknowledged him to be a serial killer, all this **** about becoming a political party, joining the GA, forming a soviet-style party, changing knoxism to this edgy ****, trying to form a parliament in the halfling village.

“WHAT???? T’ey cu’ ‘is ‘ead off? Tha’s OU’RAGEOUS!” Daisy Applefoot the Halfling would cry out

 

”Clearleh t’ey should’ve chopped off more o’ ‘is bodeh as well! Ye go’ ter make sure ‘e cannae come back as ah ‘eadless zombie! Once t’eh arms ‘n legs are removed t’eh threa’s o’ foul Necromancy decreases sigifican’leh!” “

 

The halflings have veered off what they should be.))

Knoxism stopped being a joke a very long time ago and turned into a serious religion. While most Halfling religions aren’t meant to be super crazy detailed or anything, most Knoxist RP is fairly serious (especially these recent changes).

 

Why is forming the Conservative Party edgy? It was created in RP due to Lomrun’s character responding to what he had seen happening? The party was basically made in RP without an inch of OOC planning going into it beforehand.

 

Why is joining the GA edgy? All the RP the GA has done is serious and not what most people would consider “edgy”.

 

The soviet-style party is a long-running joke ever since Bernard Oakstool joined the village of Old Dunshire and started writing a bunch of communist manifestos that basically advocated for everything that the Halflings had been doing since Dunwood in Aegis. It hooked on with many Halflings in the village as a result, even some who are fairly Anti-Communist IRL like @Hobbits and @Kaiser. It formed due to slowly building RP and bit of fun-loving attitude here and there.

 

Why are the new Knoxist changes edgy if they’re Canon Lore ever since Jandy updated the official Orcish Spirit list? If anything, it’s less edgy now since we’re worshiping actual deities instead of a serial killer.

 

Why is trying to have a parliament in the village edgy? It was a serious suggestion even if we’re not ending up following through with it all.

 

I don’t think that you know what being “edgy” is. You’re just seeing that we’re having fun without having a 100% straight face all the time and consider that a problem.

 

If you have any advice as to how we can be more serious while still having fun, just send me a message on the Forums. I’d love to hear it))

 

Daisy Applefoot sighs “bigguns don’ know ‘ow ter live ah good life...”

Edited by NotEvilAtAll

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“Truley the only reasonable conclusion is that Knox is a shapeshifter, duh...” Buck Says

 

 

 

((As for OOC, all the halflings are having fun with this and not taking it too seriously. This is the reason we don’t invite you to parties @ImperialTortoise ! ))

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6 hours ago, ImperialTortoise said:

((I know that, nobody acknowledged him to be a serial killer, all this **** about becoming a political party, joining the GA, forming a soviet-style party, changing knoxism to this edgy ****, trying to form a parliament in the halfling village.

Spoiler

I know that you have no idea what you’re on about so I would honestly love to hear your explanation about how this change to Knoxism is edgy. Please dear god, entertain the entire halfling group and respond, it will be great.

 

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11 hours ago, NotEvilAtAll said:

((I hate to tell this to you, but everything in this new Knoxist Dogma was learned in a very serious Spirit Walk led by @_Jandy_ that had 6 Halflings participating and 9 Halflings rallied for the event at its peak.

Knoxism stopped being a joke a very long time ago and turned into a serious religion. While most Halfling religions aren’t meant to be super crazy detailed or anything, most Knoxist RP is fairly serious (especially these recent changes).

 

Why is forming the Conservative Party edgy? It was created in RP due to Lomrun’s character responding to what he had seen happening? The party was basically made in RP without an inch of OOC planning going into it beforehand.

 

Why is joining the GA edgy? All the RP the GA has done is serious and not what most people would consider “edgy”.

 

The soviet-style party is a long-running joke ever since Bernard Oakstool joined the village of Old Dunshire and started writing a bunch of communist manifestos that basically advocated for everything that the Halflings had been doing since Dunwood in Aegis. It hooked on with many Halflings in the village as a result, even some who are fairly Anti-Communist IRL like @Hobbits and @Kaiser. It formed due to slowly building RP and bit of fun-loving attitude here and there.

 

Why are the new Knoxist changes edgy if they’re Canon Lore ever since Jandy updated the official Orcish Spirit list? If anything, it’s less edgy now since we’re worshiping actual deities instead of a serial killer.

 

Why is trying to have a parliament in the village edgy? It was a serious suggestion even if we’re not ending up following through with it all.

 

I don’t think that you know what being “edgy” is. You’re just seeing that we’re having fun without having a 100% straight face all the time and consider that a problem.

 

If you have any advice as to how we can be more serious while still having fun, just send me a message on the Forums. I’d love to hear it))

 

Daisy Applefoot sighs “bigguns don’ know ‘ow ter live ah good life...”

((I didn’t say all that was edgy, I said it was improper and un-halfling like. Joining big political organisations such as the GA veers off what the halflings should be. Peaceful people who hold festivals and farm with each other in their own village, not caring about whats going on the biggun land, not trying to change laws in the biggun land. I remember when myself and three other halflings got a delvers uniform and hid under it and explored their keep, that was fun. Also, these are traditions that are broken by you for example:
|🎃Do not fight with your own or stir any trouble within Dunshire or to other kingdoms...

|🎃Change must and always will be shunned.

|🎃All halflings must maintain properness.))

Edited by ImperialTortoise

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