Edition III of Fi'Maehr

[Demented_Delila 1119]

Fi’Maehr

In Pursuit of New Knowledge

Published 361 ES

This newspaper was written on the part of several elves within Haense, in order to both familiarize our valah lliran with our habits and provide information to new elves entering the city. It should be expected Fi’Maehr will be posted every one to three elvish weeks, given time for the collection and articulation of information.

Drink of the Year

This year’s “Drink of the Year” has been declared a superbly rare vintage, the Curonic Mead at Wittenbach’s Warehaus, originally from F. Vintners and made in the year 1705 of the FA. 

For reference, this mead is from the northerly castle-city once called “Curon”, often known for its extensive array of roses, brews, and available schooling. In later years, all that remained of this once historic city was the fortress known to many as “The Eye of Man”. This vintage is a touch over a century, and likely not that good for you to drink anymore.

Meads are a versatile drink, pairable with just about any meal or food you could think of. My preferred pairing is cold mead served with a fruit pie or baked cheesecake. However, I do recommend that if you seek to recreate the Curonic Mead, that you needn’t do too much research.

 

 Mead is an incredibly simple recipe and can be made by combining honey, water, and fermented yeast. You must heat it before adding the yeast, then store it in your cellar in bottles. You’ll want to strain it before serving, but it’s a relatively simple alcohol to produce. Once you have made it, you can also experiment with it by adding fruit to your taste, and extra sugars if you prefer a sweeter mead.

 

Author's Note: Upon publication, this rare vintage has been sold.

Recommended by a Librarian

 

In remembrance of what was lost.

 

Dear Mali’thill in exile and Haeseni readers, these last couple of years we have witnessed a number of publications attempting to tarnish the name of the Republic. Sure, that ought not come as a surprise considering that the one in charge of the sole newspaper in Haelun’or is a convicted impure who sold miracle cures and contraceptive methods in order to hoard as much gold as possible, but still, the attempt remains. So, considering that we are now celebrating two years since the fall of the Republic and the beginning of this schism, I consider it fitting to remember some of the Republic’s greatest accomplishments that, were the establishment to last more than thirty years, no doubt would’ve fructified into something even grander.

 

I. The Haelun’orian Medical System. 

During the years of the Republic, courtesy of a handful of able and devout medics who oversaw the institution, the Clinic of Haelun’or was a center of medical progress and learning. Not that long ago, Maeve Elibar’acal and Lorelei Miravaris were the physicians to publish perhaps the most comprehensive curriculum of medicine to this date. That, coupled with the dedication of the medics and the most modern equipment readily available, rapidly made the quality of medical training one of the best. 

 

II. The Revival of the Eternal Institutions. 

During the last decade of the Republic, the change in leadership in the maehr department generated massive progress in the academic sector. The system of the Eternal College saw the meaningful changes designed to facilitate proper education and saw the resurgence of almost forgotten areas of academia such as the Elven language and Thaumaturgy. At the same time, many agreements were struck between the Eternal Library and other centers of knowledge throughout the realm, most significant of them perhaps being the one with the Northern Geographical Society, through the skillful use of Library pins. 

 

III. Steadfast Diplomacy. 

The Republic’s skilled diplomats secured Haelun’or’s position in continental politics, maintaining and restoring friendly relations with nigh on every nation, avoiding blunders like recognizing an illegitimate princedom ruled by an illegitimate dynasty. One of the most important of the Republic’s diplomatic accomplishments was the securing of an alliance with the Holy Orenian Empire. Said alliance is what enabled the Eternal Library’s collection to be moved safely first to Helena, then to the Eye of Man and later to the continent of Almaris during the Fall of Arcas. So diligent were the Orenians in handling Haelun’or’s treasure that not one single book of the one thousand five hundred went missing or was damaged.

 

IV. It Served the People.

Lastly, but by no means the least important, the regime of the Republic was one of freedom. In regards to the individual rights acknowledged by the state, it was one of the most enlightened  systems and served as inspiration to many of our lesser friends seeking to better their own lives and governments. It was seen as liberating by many foreigners fleeing from oppression. Now, the tables have sadly turned, and it is we, the Mali’thill, who are now fleeing from oppression.

 

~Maenor Aildhuin

Aevaris Column

 

Basic First Aid Everyone Should Know:

Upon my full transition into Haeseni society, I have noticed the sheer lack of general first aid that anyone can do. Not to dissuade anyone from attending the clinic, especially when injury requires more advanced treatment. Cuts are the easiest to treat, just washing them and wrapping will save you a trip to the clinic in the long run. Burns are a little more tricky, depending on the severity of the burn. If it’s not blistering, just keeping it cool and covered will heal it quickly. If there is blistering or anything worse, do report to the clinic to have it be treated properly. Simple first aid kits should include: a small bottle of Carrion Black or high proof Vodka, clean strips of cloth or bandages, cotton swabs and some form of cooling agent (snail slime, aloe vera, and or frost vine salve). Keep the kit in the house or in a small waterproof pouch for optimal use. For any other questions, please contact the clinic staff.

~Aestenia Aevaris

The Pillows of Sutica

 

Unfortunate realization came to me, just this evening, as to the creation of more elvish body pillows. This time, the one I had the most undue luck of finding, starring the Trade Prince Mika Uialben. I am both alarmed and appalled by the existence of this item, as this one more then definitely seems to try to entice a buyer into more unsavory activities.

 

Could you believe this? He is decorated with a smirk, and many jewels, all the more to seem enticing to good young lasses. I can only declare this much: any mali who consents to having their likeness made upon large, body sized pillows ought to be ASHAMED of themselves! 

 

Our ancestors outlived the White Rose, outlived tragedies, in all the hopes that we would live better lives than them. This is most definitely not what they desired for us, not in the LEAST. The objectification of mali, as a whole, is an affront to the population. It endangers us.

 

I have lived this long, and I am most definitely not without memory of men and women approaching me with intent to flirt and woo. Of course, I was always appalled by this behavior, especially in scenarios when they approached believing I was relative to their age- usually early twenties. Something Valah do not realize is that Mali children, of every sort, are not adults until the age of fifty. These are age old laws instituted from the days of Malin. 

 

Of course, this doesn’t prevent the occasional case of less than savory men going for actual youths of sixteen or so. Twice, within twenty years, I encountered this. Men with power over young mali in foreign courts desiring them as wives and bedfellows! I will remain appalled by the apparent lust that exists for all mali, regardless of their gender, or type.

 

I beg, as a living being, don’t make this stupid ****. An additional note, of course, is don’t do business with Sutica! Most of their fabric is DISEASED.

[Ryloth 4312]

1 hour ago, Demented_Delila said:

Unfortunate realization came to me, just this evening, as to the creation of more elvish body pillows. This time, the one I had the most undue luck of finding, starring the Trade Prince Mika Uialben.

"Another that I shall acquire for my ever-expanding collection!" Haskir slams the table at which he sat with a firm fist, like the gavel of a judge. He WILL have his pillows, and he sets out post-haste to collect one.