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New player’s second month, OOC bs, Hard work and war


JoshBright
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Josh, I may get after you sometimes, but truthfully I feel like a big sister to you and many others. Ill push your buttons, you'll push mine, but at the end of the day Ill have your back. You needed this break, just as we all do at some point. The amount of friends youve made will forever outweigh those who seek to bully and harrass you. You've got an army, they have a platoon. 

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luckily, this  server  is big enough to the point where a person  can safely just observe from the  sidelines, theres plenty of places like that currently, anywhere that isn't Norland, Urguan, Haense, or Oren should be relativley peaceful, even some places  in Urguan should be peaceful, and some places in Oren, seeing as theres  places too deep into each empires  for raiders on the other side to really care about, either way, i wish you well on your break  and look forward to your return!

2 minutes ago, argonian said:

The war isn't OOC though.

while terry and most of the urguan government are oocly amazing people.

 

it is kind of silly to irply start a war because someone "supposedly" tried to stab a sheep, hm?

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4 minutes ago, MailC3p said:

while terry and most of the urguan government are oocly amazing people.

 

it is kind of silly to irply start a war because someone "supposedly" tried to stab a sheep, hm?

Except the staff enforced the end of that war, and then Nectorist sent an ultimatum and started it back up again. The war would not be happening rn without that ultimatum, so unless you're saying Oren started it back up because of OOC, then the war is not OOC.

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9 minutes ago, MailC3p said:

it is kind of silly to irply start a war because someone "supposedly" tried to stab a sheep, hm?

 

 

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4 minutes ago, Crevel said:

 

 

 

okay, this is funny i must admit

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Take a break man, we all need one. I would however look at your tavern and all your work differently. You have worked so hard and so passionately for what you had, and it all was burned to the ground (literally).

If I was in your spot, I would think of this as great character development. In-roleplay, you can take this as a devastating event, and become absolutely disheartened and vengeance-seeking. Or, you can deal with it in-character through rebuilding. Take the cards you were dealt, and do good from it. It's up to you though. No one's gonna stop you from leaving, and no one's gonna stop you from staying.

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The fact that you tagged me has warmed my heart.

Come talk to me and tell me what we can do better. No one should feel oocly targeted or pushed out of the community.

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my advice to you would be to avoid large-scale communities, especially ones at war if you feel as though it's damaging your mental health

chill in a smaller settlement, guild, or lair. hook up with some friends of yours and create self-sustaining RP

leave discord servers if you have to, limit it to the ones where you know you won't be exposed to drama or toxicity 

i know it's easier said than done, but ever since avoiding nation-RP and OOC politics and staying in my own lane, i've been enjoying my time on LOTC considerably more in the last six months than the last six years i've been playing

wishing the best to a new player, from an old player

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Hey mate, give me a ring if you want some personal pointers on how to avoid much of the chagrin and stress that you've described.

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5 hours ago, UnusualBrit said:

I think you should take a break if you’re having a hard time on lotc, there’s no point playing if your not getting any fun out of it at the end of the day!

You're telling this to a dude that forked out 300 $ and played 600+ hours in two months, I think dude has bigger problems than not having fun

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In addition to what everyone else has said about picking and choosing your communities and generally going for the smaller ones, as well as choosing to ignore or not participate in certain things:

When it stops being fun, it's time to take a break. I realized this myself earlier this week - There's nothing wrong with taking a break. Look back on it all after a break and decide whether you want to come back. The most important thing is that you have fun

 

Same as everyone else, even though I'm on hiatus, my PMs are always open for anyone

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On 12/12/2021 at 1:07 AM, Ziggitee said:


“Haense, nicht Heanse..” Murmured a young Barclay boy as he trained with his crossbow. “But gutte job, cousin Jurgen.” He’d state shortly thereafter, grinning proudly.

 

15 hours ago, EXCITED said:

You're a great dude, hit me up if you need anything!

 

15 hours ago, tadabug2000 said:

Take the breather you need, friendo! Eat some icecream, touch some snow, chug a gallon of water. 💖

 

15 hours ago, Harald said:

I love you man <3

 

15 hours ago, SoulReapingWolf said:

It genuinely saddens me to see that your experience has gone from an amazing first month to this. I really hope that if you do decide to come back your experiences will be more akin to those you lived during that first month. 

Please know that if you ever need anything my DMs are open. 

 

15 hours ago, FredrickTeufel said:

Gods speed king. I'm still here with you.

 

15 hours ago, PrettyCuteAnna said:

I WILL MISS YOU- KEEP IN TOUCH!! :(

 

15 hours ago, UnusualBrit said:

I think you should take a break if you’re having a hard time on lotc, there’s no point playing if your not getting any fun out of it at the end of the day!

 

15 hours ago, EmiliainWonderland said:

Sorry you feel that way, LOTC is a pretty toxic place but I hope you'll come back and give us a chance to make you playing more worth it. 

 

Don't let the war get you down, because when it's over, you'll have a lot of fun if you ignore all the other ooc drama.

 

15 hours ago, GMRO said:

I really hope you don't quit @JoshBrightas you've been great thus far. I would suggest taking a break though to avoid wearing yourself down. On the plus side, don't give up as you do provide a lot of people with a positive view of what enjoying the server can look like, and just remember that you can rebuild anything.

 

I would encourage in the meantime to hopefully find something within Providence to do so as to stay far out of the way of conflict, but also whoever is in charge of Oren taxation to give you a tax break on the tavern!

 

15 hours ago, Cjmate8 said:

I like your face.

 

15 hours ago, Eryane said:

To go off of what @GMRO said, please send me a DM and I can help you find something in Providence that will keep you away from the conflict. I know for a new player this can be pretty scary to see a war and a lot of OOC hate (because wars unfortunately always seem to turn out this way and become so toxic) but know that all these communities will be okay at the end of the day. 

 

Taking a break is definitely a smart decision to give yourself some time to breath. These sorts of things can get so stressful and you have to take care of yourself first and foremost. If you need to VC, or anything at all, do not hesitate to reach out whatsoever.

 

Always here for you, you've been an amazing addition to our community and I really do hope you stick around - but choose what is best for you at the end of the day. o7 

 

15 hours ago, MapleSunflower said:

Hi Josh!

I went through something extremely similar back in August, my second month on LOTC as well. Ferrymen were consistently raiding Providence and we were all feeling the same stress and demoralization you feel now. Here’s some tips I’ve learned from my time here on LOTC:


-Take breaks when you need to. Go take that shower, eat a meal, watch a tv show, or play another video game (even if it’s like club penguin or among us lmao!)
-If this means going to another nation to rp with your friends, go ahead! Ask your orenian friends out for a vacation rp in elysium or anywhere you wish. Just be careful on the roads of course. Maybe meet in the spawn and ride on horses together. 

-You are allowed to not rally. If they ask? Just say personal life reasons. If you’re online, you can’t be able to hear oren’s bell from let’s say elysium or lubba’s keep or wherever else you are. So then you may not have to come.

-Allow yourself to ignore birds. You can accept them and throw up away, or right out not answer! 

-If there are rude people on lotc who are oocly targeting you, and you really are bothered by it, get a desktop (NOT MOBILE) ss by doing ctrl & prnt scr (print screen copies the content on the screen and you can paste it into discord message!) Make sure there is the time stamp and is not edited/cut. Then you may send it to a mod and request to open an investigation into harassment/targeting/whatever the mod thinks.
-Value your time where you are. Value your irp and ooc friends. They’re here for you. 

-Be kind to yourself.

 

People will tell you “it’s just a mineman server.” And yes, it is, but they’re always missing the second half- the true point they might be trying to say. It is a minecraft server, but your emotions connected to it are valid. Everyone gets character bleed here and there, everyone feels the pressure. Irp or ooc actions truly affect us - the same way someone a fan of a tv show may cry when their favorite character suffers a major loss or even dies. Lotc is like our little tv show that everyone writes together. You are allowed to feel these emotions, but make sure you rest up from them too. 
 

LOTC is a story we all have made together, It’s ugly and beautiful simultaneously. 
 

So, be kind to yourself and rest.

Enjoy the story, my friend. 

 

15 hours ago, KaiserJacobII said:

Take a break when you need it, and leave if you want to. If you don't leave, and if your current roleplay is burning you out I suggest you look into various different roleplay communities on our server. There are tons of unique experiences to have on this server! Do what you want, and what makes you feel good. My DMs are open if you ever want to talk about anything.

 

14 hours ago, SapphirePool said:

Josh, I may get after you sometimes, but truthfully I feel like a big sister to you and many others. Ill push your buttons, you'll push mine, but at the end of the day Ill have your back. You needed this break, just as we all do at some point. The amount of friends youve made will forever outweigh those who seek to bully and harrass you. You've got an army, they have a platoon. 

 

14 hours ago, MailC3p said:

luckily, this  server  is big enough to the point where a person  can safely just observe from the  sidelines, theres plenty of places like that currently, anywhere that isn't Norland, Urguan, Haense, or Oren should be relativley peaceful, even some places  in Urguan should be peaceful, and some places in Oren, seeing as theres  places too deep into each empires  for raiders on the other side to really care about, either way, i wish you well on your break  and look forward to your return!

while terry and most of the urguan government are oocly amazing people.

 

it is kind of silly to irply start a war because someone "supposedly" tried to stab a sheep, hm?

 

14 hours ago, Crevel said:

 

 

 

14 hours ago, Ryanark said:

Take a break man, we all need one. I would however look at your tavern and all your work differently. You have worked so hard and so passionately for what you had, and it all was burned to the ground (literally).

If I was in your spot, I would think of this as great character development. In-roleplay, you can take this as a devastating event, and become absolutely disheartened and vengeance-seeking. Or, you can deal with it in-character through rebuilding. Take the cards you were dealt, and do good from it. It's up to you though. No one's gonna stop you from leaving, and no one's gonna stop you from staying.

 

13 hours ago, Disheartened said:

The fact that you tagged me has warmed my heart.

Come talk to me and tell me what we can do better. No one should feel oocly targeted or pushed out of the community.

 

13 hours ago, ᴜɴᴡɪʟʟɪɴɢʟʏ said:

my advice to you would be to avoid large-scale communities, especially ones at war if you feel as though it's damaging your mental health

chill in a smaller settlement, guild, or lair. hook up with some friends of yours and create self-sustaining RP

leave discord servers if you have to, limit it to the ones where you know you won't be exposed to drama or toxicity 

i know it's easier said than done, but ever since avoiding nation-RP and OOC politics and staying in my own lane, i've been enjoying my time on LOTC considerably more in the last six months than the last six years i've been playing

wishing the best to a new player, from an old player

 

12 hours ago, Gaius Marius said:

Hey mate, give me a ring if you want some personal pointers on how to avoid much of the chagrin and stress that you've described.

 

9 hours ago, Salvo said:

You're telling this to a dude that forked out 300 $ and played 600+ hours in two months, I think dude has bigger problems than not having fun

 

9 hours ago, Polysemic said:

In addition to what everyone else has said about picking and choosing your communities and generally going for the smaller ones, as well as choosing to ignore or not participate in certain things:

When it stops being fun, it's time to take a break. I realized this myself earlier this week - There's nothing wrong with taking a break. Look back on it all after a break and decide whether you want to come back. The most important thing is that you have fun

 

Same as everyone else, even though I'm on hiatus, my PMs are always open for anyone

the level of support I received from this is something I never expected or could have guessed. started crying after I read it all, thank you guys 

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13 minutes ago, JoshBright said:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

the level of support I received from this is something I never expected or could have guessed. started crying after I read it all, thank you guys 

Remember to have social interaction outside LotC my friend, burying yourself in a game won't do you any good in the long run

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This one pulls a bit on my heart strings since I was in very similar waters a long time ago. Although I agree a lot with what others have said above, a simple break isn't the solution here. To explain, let's break down the hours. 630 hours spread out across 2 months (60~ days) averages out to 10.5 hours a day, every day, for two months in a row. It is very difficult to not get upset at a negative RP event, such as war, if the majority of your waking time is invested into LotC. That world becomes your world.

 

I don't know what your situation is, and I certainly can't tell you how to use your time. I only want to warn you that LotC is a different beast than other video games. It's a living and breathing world with the heartbeat of hundreds of concurrent authors throughout the day - thousands in the weeks and months. It's a great escape, but the curse of its engrossment can last longer than you needed it for. 

 

Practice moderation like with all things. It is possible to balance roleplay with the rest of real life, but it's not the same prescription for everyone. Check in with yourself periodically -- if you feel that you're becoming too involved, then you probably are. Empower yourself to make that decision because, at the end of the day, it's just Minecraft.

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