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The Troubles of An Anxious Player


ChillHumor
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Hi all! I made an account here awhile ago but only started playing last month. I've had some good rp through some events and I've been really enjoying lotc, but I've come to a problem. I get horrible anxiety any time I even think about engaging in rp with strangers without any particular reason. I can force myself to roleplay fine when it comes to events, but random spur-of-the-moment rp is difficult to engage in. Most of the events that occur in the area my characters in happen while I'm at work. Does anybody have any suggestions to help engage with strangers or perhaps find other events to attend?

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I feel like the only suggestion is maybe getting a friend to tag along or introduce you to new groups IRP, hopefully that helps.

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lotc is an open world that is meant to be explored and interacted with. there's no such thing as someone who isn't "open" to RP, bc the moment you log on, you subject yourself to the world and players around you. the people you interact with subject themselves to your interaction by logging on to the server

i understand how the new player experience can be, and more so, i understand how rough dealing with anxiety can be. with that being said, i sincerely think your hesitance to approach strangers in-RP is just a result of overthinking. no one is judging you for engaging in conversation in-RP, because that's what the world is about. of course there will be instances where someone might not respond the way you would have liked, or someone might be totally AFK, but it's not something to let bother you too much

remember, it's just a game, and you can choose to disengage at literally any time

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1 hour ago, ChillHumor said:

Hi all! I made an account here awhile ago but only started playing last month. I've had some good rp through some events and I've been really enjoying lotc, but I've come to a problem. I get horrible anxiety any time I even think about engaging in rp with strangers without any particular reason. I can force myself to roleplay fine when it comes to events, but random spur-of-the-moment rp is difficult to engage in. Most of the events that occur in the area my characters in happen while I'm at work. Does anybody have any suggestions to help engage with strangers or perhaps find other events to attend?


 Hey bud!

 As others have mentioned, so I will as well give a bit of advice from myself.

 Oddly enough I suffer from similar issue even after many years, though most of the people that know me would never think like that I believe.

 

 My honest opinion here is going to be as followed:
 Join some nations ACTIVE military. I did so when I first joined the LOTC, and did the same for the next few years whenever I returned back to play for a longer time. Proper military RP gives you a lot of chances to RP, where you will have people to talk with based on the matters of simply even asking "Is everything alright?", or doing gate duty, where you can actively meet new people, and then have a reason to engage in a conversation afterwards like "How are you enjoying the town so far?".
 There will be also a lot of recognition from the nation itself. People who actively work in guard force, engaging in RP on everyday basis, even as simple as saluting to the passing general, or talking with citizens to ensure they are feeling okay, will receive a lot of attention and good chances to be engaged in RP, instead of having to engage by themselves.

 

 If you would like any more suggestions, hit me up in DMs and I can try to help you figure out something that will work for you!

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56 minutes ago, Wulfery said:

My honest opinion here is going to be as followed:
 Join some nations ACTIVE military. I did so when I first joined the LOTC, and did the same for the next few years whenever I returned back to play for a longer time. Proper military RP gives you a lot of chances to RP, where you will have people to talk with based on the matters of simply even asking "Is everything alright?", or doing gate duty, where you can actively meet new people, and then have a reason to engage in a conversation afterwards like "How are you enjoying the town so far?".
 There will be also a lot of recognition from the nation itself. People who actively work in guard force, engaging in RP on everyday basis, even as simple as saluting to the passing general, or talking with citizens to ensure they are feeling okay, will receive a lot of attention and good chances to be engaged in RP, instead of having to engage by themselves.

 

absolutely reccommend this. However, make sure you're a part of a military, and not just a piece of it.

 

I started the server in the Renatian Legion back in ~Nov 2018. It's a fantastic way to sort of have a "Starting position" in the world. You get access to some buildings, gate doors, some basic gear and if you're lucky lodgings in a barracks. It's a great way to start getting to know people. Do gate roleplay. Sit in the gate and do basic checks on allowing people in and out of the city. Get to know other characters and saying things as simple as "Ah, welcome to _city_ , what's your name? place of residence? any weaponry on you? reason for visiting?" Your "Papers Please" roleplay will see your anxiety generally begin to dispel on roleplaying. 

 

The reason I say it's bad to be a piece of a military is that nations in the past would assign you to grinding or other menial activities which detracted from time spent roleplaying. Some people liked it, I kinda did. But just say "Oh well, instead, how about you put me on patrol with someone?" in RP, that way you can do stuff like that. It can be hard to approach people and there can be even more anxiety when you're afraid of them ignoring you. But as you rp more and more, that anxiety will generally begin to fade and dissipate. I did RP in the Renatian Legion up until ~July 2020. I highly recommend military rp in an active city. Great way to make friends ICly and OOCly.

 

Best of luck and happy roleplaying.

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6 hours ago, SquakHawk said:

 

absolutely reccommend this. However, make sure you're a part of a military, and not just a piece of it.

 

I started the server in the Renatian Legion back in ~Nov 2018. It's a fantastic way to sort of have a "Starting position" in the world. You get access to some buildings, gate doors, some basic gear and if you're lucky lodgings in a barracks. It's a great way to start getting to know people. Do gate roleplay. Sit in the gate and do basic checks on allowing people in and out of the city. Get to know other characters and saying things as simple as "Ah, welcome to _city_ , what's your name? place of residence? any weaponry on you? reason for visiting?" Your "Papers Please" roleplay will see your anxiety generally begin to dispel on roleplaying. 

 

The reason I say it's bad to be a piece of a military is that nations in the past would assign you to grinding or other menial activities which detracted from time spent roleplaying. Some people liked it, I kinda did. But just say "Oh well, instead, how about you put me on patrol with someone?" in RP, that way you can do stuff like that. It can be hard to approach people and there can be even more anxiety when you're afraid of them ignoring you. But as you rp more and more, that anxiety will generally begin to fade and dissipate. I did RP in the Renatian Legion up until ~July 2020. I highly recommend military rp in an active city. Great way to make friends ICly and OOCly.

 

Best of luck and happy roleplaying.

Did excactly the same thing a month later, can only suggest doing it.

 

Oren

Haense

Celia'nor

 

Are 3 nations who I know have active military RP.

 

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6 hours ago, ChillHumor said:

Hi all! I made an account here awhile ago but only started playing last month. I've had some good rp through some events and I've been really enjoying lotc, but I've come to a problem. I get horrible anxiety any time I even think about engaging in rp with strangers without any particular reason. I can force myself to roleplay fine when it comes to events, but random spur-of-the-moment rp is difficult to engage in. Most of the events that occur in the area my characters in happen while I'm at work. Does anybody have any suggestions to help engage with strangers or perhaps find other events to attend?

Hello!

 

I can understand that feeling because i have been overlooking a lot of players with anxiety problems and it is sometimes really hard to trust people if you just want to have some "Trustworthy RP" (As in rp that is not going to turn toxic bla bla bla, that kind of stuff). Maybe this is not what you are looking for, but I would still say in any circumstances, look for a active roleplay group that would fit your time. Majority of them are centred around EST timezone but there is also groups that are centred around European timezones.

 

I could give you some advice if you need to, but since I didn't get enough information from you, you could perhaps maybe explain more about what type of roleplay you are looking for? Are you interested in Military? (Cuz I see thats the most suggestions you've got), or is it other things?

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10 hours ago, SquakHawk said:

 

absolutely reccommend this. However, make sure you're a part of a military, and not just a piece of it.

 

I started the server in the Renatian Legion back in ~Nov 2018. It's a fantastic way to sort of have a "Starting position" in the world. You get access to some buildings, gate doors, some basic gear and if you're lucky lodgings in a barracks. It's a great way to start getting to know people. Do gate roleplay. Sit in the gate and do basic checks on allowing people in and out of the city. Get to know other characters and saying things as simple as "Ah, welcome to _city_ , what's your name? place of residence? any weaponry on you? reason for visiting?" Your "Papers Please" roleplay will see your anxiety generally begin to dispel on roleplaying. 

 

The reason I say it's bad to be a piece of a military is that nations in the past would assign you to grinding or other menial activities which detracted from time spent roleplaying. Some people liked it, I kinda did. But just say "Oh well, instead, how about you put me on patrol with someone?" in RP, that way you can do stuff like that. It can be hard to approach people and there can be even more anxiety when you're afraid of them ignoring you. But as you rp more and more, that anxiety will generally begin to fade and dissipate. I did RP in the Renatian Legion up until ~July 2020. I highly recommend military rp in an active city. Great way to make friends ICly and OOCly.

 

Best of luck and happy roleplaying.

So I did actually join the Brotherhood of St. Karl, and I had some good roleplay with that. Gate duty has sounded fun but I don't actually know when I'm supposed to do it? I've wanted to attend a lot of the BSK's events but the server tends to schedule their events during my work hours, unfortunately. I think my biggest concern relating to all this is engaging the roleplay, if that makes sense? I've had other players randomly engage in rp with me and I get a huge wave of relief over me everytime that I don't have to be the one to start it. I'll probably hop on today and force myself to rp with some folk. Thank you all for the advice.

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7 hours ago, ChillHumor said:

So I did actually join the Brotherhood of St. Karl, and I had some good roleplay with that. Gate duty has sounded fun but I don't actually know when I'm supposed to do it? I've wanted to attend a lot of the BSK's events but the server tends to schedule their events during my work hours, unfortunately. I think my biggest concern relating to all this is engaging the roleplay, if that makes sense? I've had other players randomly engage in rp with me and I get a huge wave of relief over me everytime that I don't have to be the one to start it. I'll probably hop on today and force myself to rp with some folk. Thank you all for the advice.

Hey man! For the first bit.. In Haense feel free to do gate duty when ever! There’s a channel to log it in aswell in the discord! :))

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When I first joined, the way that I managed to get around my anxiety was through tavern keeping roleplay. Try to head into a town and become a staff member at a local tavern! It's a good way for you to be able to interact with people, and most of the time, people go to you for roleplay while you're behind the bar of a tavern. You get to know the other people who work there, and some of the other people in the local town, and an active tavern roleplay scene really gives you an opportunity to get to know your 'regular' customers on a more personal basis and allow you to make connections.

 

The one thing I always like saying to new players is "Tavernkeepers and Guards!" when they're looking for initial roleplay jobs. After that point when you start to get to know more people, you can start to branch out in what you want your character to do a bit more easily.

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