How do you make friends?

[Priceflash 757]

You're overthinking it. Literally just talk to people. That is how you make friends. Have a genuine interest in them and find people who seem interested in you. In game, start roleplay with someone random. Do it consistently, and you'll have a friend.

 

If you look weird or act weird, people are going to think you're weird. So, at least try to conform a little. In 2022 you can stylistically do whatever as long as its put together and your not a furry. (This pertains to real life especially)

 

Be nice and respectful. Be self aware. 

2 hours ago, Air said:

 

 

What if you say the wrong thing or you feel like they don't like you from the start? The idea that you might've ruined something and should've tried a different time? Or even the thought that you missed and opportunity that you should've taken. Should you just ignore reason and go for it? It all feels so overwhelming when faced with someone you don't know.

Thank you all for taking the time to reply to this, I appreciate all the advice even if I haven't taken the time to reply to you individually.

 

Sounds like you got some anxiety fam, i'd address that. 

 

Your thought process probably is something lie: What's wrong with me why can't i make friends is it me?

 

In reality: You have anxiety talking to people and therefore you won't make friends because you don't talk to them. It's probably not anything you said or did, but the fact that you aren't interacting. Stop overthinking it.

 

 

[A_Good_Fellow 31]

3 hours ago, Air said:

What if you say the wrong thing or you feel like they don't like you from the start? The idea that you might've ruined something and should've tried a different time? Or even the thought that you missed and opportunity that you should've taken. Should you just ignore reason and go for it? It all feels so overwhelming when faced with someone you don't know.

Hmm looks like your views real particular.

 

Plenty will tell you how to live or to how you should act or think. That's up to you to practice, live out, and deal with what comes.

 

As for regrets and treating people like NPCs, it ain't that simple. No friendship bars IRL and even a good friendship could go crazy south for no fault of your own like them getting hooked on drugs. I would say do what you think is best, whatever BEST is for you.

 

As for actionable steps building up confidence and practicing the skill cuz, it is a skill that can just be practiced and observed. Body language and first impressions is a whole thing so be your best self and learn what ya can by trial and error even with just shot interactions. Again the internet provides sources.

 

 

 

1 hour ago, Werew0lf said:

Who needs friends… ;(

Hugs are nice

[Laeonathan 3929]

I just start talking to people. Usually at places where I share hobbies. May it be your political party, firefighters, online rp community, church... but usually its, the 10 same people I hang out since 8 years lol.

[Unwillingly 11110]

4 hours ago, Priceflash said:

You're overthinking it. Literally just talk to people. That is how you make friends. Have a genuine interest in them and find people who seem interested in you. In game, start roleplay with someone random. Do it consistently, and you'll have a friend.

literally this tbh

real friendships come from interactions that form out of genuine interest, not hamfisted "wanna be friends?" tier messages

for me, most of my friendships form as a result of roleplay interaction as opposed to the other way around

[TheCaptain 403]

 

 

 

I annoy people until they like me.

[MeteorDragon 2809]

Yeah I find it impossible to make friends unless they start talking to me, this is both ooc and irp

[Royal Peasant 444]

I would say that I'm a bit of a introvert myself, yet when it comes to me having friends it usually worked by us having a common interest. Something we both liked and could bond over. For example, where we are right now! Lotc. I have made several friends since I ended up joining this place that have been a delight to interact with. Another common interest I have made friends with over the last ten years would be d&d, or dungeons and dragons for those not aware. My oldest and closet friends I met through the game and have been close with them for over ten years now. 

At the very least, having a common interest serves as a ice breaker even if you both aren't in the same games, hobbies, or interests when it comes to discussions and conversations. Not sure if this advise will assist at all but I do wish you luck in gaining a few life long friends! 

[Astrophysical 999]

Join a cult of personality. It's how I made them. :)

[Myleres 1658]

There's no universal, 'be all end all' way to make friends. If you interact with people on this server you're bound to run into someone with a common interest eventually. Priceflash and Unwillingly said it best. (: 

[Elite Snipes 3542]

@AirBest way to get friends is get involved. Join a community and join voice chats, involve yourself in conversations and be helpful to people. Playing games with people is also a big deal, some cool ice breaker games would be Garticphone and skribbl.io

You'll get the hang of it buddy :)

[Rayna Star 167]

13 hours ago, un-w said:

for me, most of my friendships form as a result of roleplay interaction as opposed to the other way around

 

As someone with social anxiety, this is key. I've found that it helps me to make a character whose natural personality is to not care what others think or be sort of brash (I try to feel out vibes if people aren't liking it though!). That way, I can easily find reasons to "force" myself into others rp. For example...

 

See someone sitting at a tavern? Offer to buy them a drink. Or try to get them to buy you one! Ask about their life story and maybe they'll start asking about yours. Don't have a life story? Try talking about something interesting you saw... rumors of war, bandits on the road, a strange clown fellow wandering the city... Getting their opinion on something that's actually happening in the overarching story of LotC is a great way to create conversation from nothing.

Join groups/guilds like you're taking free samples from the grocery store. Then find which one appeals to you and stick with it. Friendships occur from multiple positive interactions with the same people over time. It doesn't happen right away, so be patient!

 

Honestly, focusing on having good roleplay with others is going to lead to a lot more friendships than worrying too much about the irl person behind the character at first. If you work on improving your roleplay, people are naturally going to want to be around your character, and from there they'll naturally want to be around you as they slowly get to know you/recognize you ooc as well. Good luck out there! :D

[niya 180]

usually irl, i dap them up and act like their the "big dog". online i just talk ab relatable topics :)

[Nord 313]

Here is my step by step guide on friends on LOTC

 

If you're roleplayer join a active human

 

If you're goon join anything

 

 

[Nug 1885]

unironically just be yourself

[Pancho 2498]

Make friends by forging bonds in blood and iron! WAR!!! DEATH!!! GET KILLED BY COUPS!!!