The 1000's of mistakes of GAREDYN THE GREEN, EXPOSED !!!

[Charles The Bald 1789]

There was one peculiar habit that Charles “The Bald” possessed—a habit that had become somewhat of a legend within the kingdom and the world.

Every time The Bald finished writing a letter, be it to a fellow dwarf, a distant relative, or even an important dignitary, he would pause, gently lick his lips, and carefully seal the envelope.

 

This act had become so ingrained in his routine that everybody liked to receive letter from Charles, you can guess the rest. However, this one letter was left in the halls of Urguan within the refugee city of Savory for every dwarf to read :

 

The Failures of Garedyn The Green

 

We are the greatest movement in the entire world and the sky, folks. Believe me, nobody comes close. Now, let's talk about Garedyn the Green, the so-called High Chief of Heffrum. Let me tell you, he's been a disaster, an absolute disaster!

As High Chief of Heffrum, Garedyn has failed miserably in surpassing Urguan, the reigning dwarven nation. Heffrum is like a little puppy, always sitting right next to Urguan, never able to stand on its own. And guess what? It's going to stay that way until I'm gone.

Heffrum is a tremendously dull place, believe me. The architecture there, just like the halflings' buildings, lacks any semblance of originality. Sad! I totally get why nobody wants to waste their time in such a lackluster setting.

It's run by Asketil Blackroot, who's calling the shots and making it nearly impossible for anyone with fresh ideas to make a difference. What a tremendous shame for such a "cool" place, right?
 

That’s why the people of Heffrum have to come in Urguan and promote their ideals and their seriously terrible ideas; Our king want’s to concentrate power and religion, instead, Garedyn creates 5 different things and 20 other oaths. What a farce that is !

If it wasn't for Garedyn abusing his powers, Heffrum wouldn't have dared to build right in front of Urguan's gate, attracting all sorts of people who would have never even considered going to his pathetic city.

And let me tell you about Garedyn's role as the Grand Steward. He couldn't even reduce taxes properly. The people rose against him because he was so incompetent. But you know what he did? He abused his position and manipulated the taxes in Urguan to benefit himself. Look at how much Heffrum’s taxes were reduced when he announced a tax break, a joke !

Oh, and don't even get me started on his time as the Grand Admiral. He built a port-city that was empty from the moment it was created until the moment it ended. It was a complete waste of time and resources. And those ships he built? Useless! They never sailed, never fulfilled their purpose. Just a big, fat waste!

Now, let's talk about Garedyn as the High Prophet. What a disaster he is! He has caused nothing but trouble within Urguan. He even went so far as to kill another dwarf, embarrassing the institutions. And let's not forget his favoritism. He promoted his seer buddies within the clergy, practicing nepotism like it's some kind of game unlike Norli Starbreaker, who taught him everything he knows. Norli accepted dwarves from every faction, not Garedyn.

He constantly tried to get other parties arrested, creating chaos and division. He even created multiple factions within the same institution, for Yemekar's sake! And the concept of oaths he came up with? They were just copied from the Rhun, right after they created them. Talk about lack of originality!

And don't even get me started on Garedyn's supposed faith. He called for honor duels among dwarves, but he didn't act with righteousness. No, he let his emotions dictate his actions, just like he's been doing for years. He's nothing more than a childish individual who can't control himself.

He likes to talk about Norli Starbreaker, but let me tell you, he has none of Norli's redeeming qualities. No, he just takes on Norli's bad traits like it's normal behavior. And you know what? Nobody shows up to his clergy events like they do for Norli. He's a nobody, a nobody pretending to be a leader by speaking loud but actually doing absolutely NOTHING !!!

He has secret meetings with his seer pals, engaging in nepotism left and right. And you know what's the worst part?

 

Nobody wants to follow him. Nobody believes in him, nobody respects him.

So, here's what I have to say to Garedyn the Green: it's time for you to leave The Grand Kingdom of Urguan. We don't need your so-called help anymore.

Heffrum will be better with you and Urguan without you.

 

That little puppy of Urguan will finally have a chance to thrive without Asketil’s incompetence dragging it down.

 

THE MOVEMENT

FOREVER

Edited May 19, 2023 by Charles The Bald

[Beholder 200]

Briga at first thought this missive was satire, but then doubted that Charles had the wit for such a thing.

 

"Wot th' feck es 'e oan aboot? Tryin' tae start a fight oar somethin'?'

[DISCOLIQUID 1962]

"I think he is trying to bait Fa' into staying in power." supposes Smart Dwarf, Auriel.

"This Bald Charles Fellow must be quite the reverse psychologist!"

[UnusualBrit 2054]

“Shame, thought the lad had potential, yet he forgot his duty!” Thalgrim agonised at the missive.

[𝕾𝖙𝖆𝖗𝖌𝖚𝖘𝖍 2236]

Duren finds the note placed on top of the meeting table in the underground bunker of Savoy as he glares at the page squinting his stoned eyes as he immediately reads the insults

"Wot did some'un duh to dis hot head dwed. I'uono wot tuh fock is goin on."

[NotEvilAtAll 9927]

"T'ey are jus' jealous o' Gared's magnificence. 'e's t'ah bes' dwed tha's evah lived besides t'ae ol' legendareh Bjor Cottonwood" comments Mimosa Applefoot, a halfling who has met Garedyn before, as she sits around a campfire in Savoy.

[TheBigBubbles 670]

A greying old dwarf reads the missive with a squint of peach hues, "T'e vocabulareh on t'is one could use some work. Regardless o' validity, 'e shoul' take up some debatin' lessons or some shoite."