[!] A wooden pole has been set up nearby the missive, and on the pole, a letter has been attached by way of a single nail!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Good day, Lizardfolk! I am writing this response to your very, very scary edict, not out of ideological concerns (though I do believe you are speaking utter dribble on the matter), but rather out of a desire to rectify the missive itself! I believe you could get your message across much clearer if you took on some of my suggestions! Hope you find them useful!
First, let’s start with a bit of art critique, shall we? While I can’t claim to come from a background of the visually artistic (I’ve always been dreadful with drawing, you see), I think some changes could be made to your emblem! Though I think the idea of the eye in the middle has some promise, it reminds me of a piece of pineapple held between two buns. Is this an Azdromoth sandwich, perhaps?
In terms of the drawing of the ‘A’ at the top, it reminds me of an ‘Aheral scholar’s hand; all flowery and ultimately weightless. Maybe you could stylise it with some spikes coming out of the ‘A’, and surround it with some flames? Could get the point of Azdromoth across a bit better!
First paragraph, first sentence, I believe you can remove, ‘brethren who we call friend, who you call foe.’ Following that statement about ‘kith’, it just seems a little redundant in my opinion. You’ve already established the relationship in the initial part of the sentence, so there’s really no need to go on and on about it! Syntax is key!
The repetition of ‘for too long’ in the initial paragraph holds very little weight here. It is reminiscent of a child attempting to add a certain flare and ‘drama’ to their first story. Perhaps you could just use it once to establish your argument, and then let your message speak organically for itself from there?
Second paragraph. ‘Stop what will bring your end. Your end…’ Once again, the repetition! No need to say ‘end’ once again, especially after it just ended your sentence. ‘Demise’, maybe? ‘Desolation?’ I’m sure Azdromoth can invest in a thesaurus!
‘We will bring to you the fires of New Beginnings, for we will cinder your grand trees to ash and ember, to regrow without the squalor of man and beast in their tandem dance.’ - Consider breaking this sentence up! It may flow better if it was broken up into multiple sentences, rather than a single one.
‘We know of your destructive acts across the world -- destruction of arcane sources of power, repetitive, annoying.’ - Once again, REPETITION!!!! You used ‘destruction’ and ‘destructive’ too close to one another! Snore!
Third paragraph - ‘Heed our call or suffer in blazing dragons flame, unless you seek the meek end of baleful ash and brimstone same as Amaethea.’ - By the Aspects, this sentence made me wish that I forgot how to read. ‘Blazing dragons flame’. Really? ‘Blazing?’ How dull. ‘Meek end of baleful ash and brimstone?’ I take back what I said about the thesaurus before. Now it just seems you’re vomiting adjectives onto the page. Yawn!
Overall, a decent piece, but I believe some improvements could really make it shine and intimidate! Please take the time to rectify your mistakes before posting another missive. I hope this was useful to you! Much love,
Shark Druid Za’Kabar