Haz

Very good, I am impressed. Although you could add some more emotes though, but you've covered the main ones so that's fine (since there's an ever-infinite number of actions one can do). Perhaps add a little paragraph about the understanding of emoting and using the body language you have helped to detail here. Understanding how to use body language is just as important, learning to adapt these emotes to a variety of different situations or even combining them.

I never said his lore was 'wrong', just that there is nothing to suggest the Creator would create even more life, rather let the already inhabited world takes its course, this is supported by the whole Horen, Krug, Urguan and Malinor thing. I'm not saying it's impossible, just that it seems like the last resort or a little laziness (?) perhaps, it's something that has been tried a lot. Basically, you'll have everyone creating lore with the explanation of the Creator (i.e. "The Creator did it."), perhaps this is a little exaggerated, but it was and is the point being made here, you cannot blame everything on divine intervention.

No, the first man and woman birthed four children (Horen, Krug, Urguan and Malin) in different corners of Aegis, it even says it on that page. Their physical characteristics were due to chance/environment, some of the races were also influenced in their physical attributes by their curse from Iblees. All things inhabit the world and these things are also creatures, I'm not entirely sure where you're going with this. I got the 'sub-race' thing from the fact you've compared Orcs to Trolls throughout the lore, perhaps I jumped to a conclusion slightly, though. It makes perfect sense to me and thus motivated this conclusion. That reasoning seems fine. ^^

Not everything needs an explanation, no. But the origin of a race? That's a pretty important thing and seems very silly to throw away an important detail based upon the premise that you think "Not everything needs to be explained!" All lore regards races have lore to their origin, and a pretty solid that at that, look at the lore for the Mori'Quessir for example. The Creator did not create Humans, Orcs, Elves and Dwarves. Why would they turn to stone though? What reasoning is there behind this? Again, take the Mori'Quessir, they did not turn to stone but they could not live in the light - why? It was excruciatingly painful and severely limited their sight. The Creator wouldn't just 'forget'. The point is that Trolls are supposedly a sub-race of Orcs, right? Because of which, it should have an origin which relates to Orcs. That's how I see it, anyway.

I thought there already was troll lore? It was actually very well written, I can't seem to find it though. It was more directed to an evolutionary approach, whereby they were orcs whom lived within harsh weathers - growing very large and storing plenty of body fat to ensure that they keep warm, their strength derivative from their need to kill large snow-creatures. They had an inability to speak the native tongue due to their solitude, language was lost and they developed their own way of communication (grunts and other noises). I'm not saying everything must be explained, but it's nice to see something other than "creator did it" for once. These trolls just sounds like someone taken out of Tolkien's books without much amendment. Sure, LotC is meant to be loosely based upon them, but this is practically identical. You haven't much explained why an Orc turns to stone, the Creator 'forgot' to make them able to live in the light? Sounds like something a devout religious man may ramble. This seems like a character profile of a generic troll more-so than anything (physical characteristics, habits & behaviours). It's an alright idea - people want something similar to a Troll to roleplay and have for quite some time. However, I do not believe you have explained their origin with enough detail, it seems to me that you got a little lazy during this part and just resorted to the Creator explanation. Most race proposals have an in-depth reason for how they have come to be and why they are in the world. It doesn't seem to make much sense for the Creator to be suddenly creating new creature, especially since their only purpose is to ransack and pillage.For what reason would the Creator have to do this, he already created plenty of life in the beginning of which have prospered - then just to create a Troll to cause misery? Evil Creator.

Thank you for the re-formatting, much appreciated. After reading your lore thoroughly I can safely say that I have not picked out any major points for improvement. which is not something I say or even see very often on this forum, so I congratulate you. However, something which has constantly spun around in my head whilst reading this is... How exactly do you decide whether the Daemon Metzili decides the fate of a Kharajyr? If your power is entirely divine, and Metzili wishes to choose whether her people live or die then to what extent can your priests invoke this decision? It may be considered powergaming by some that such a decision can be made and is mandatory. Does she entrust her people (i.e. priests) to make the right decisions about who lives and dies? Some clarification on this matter may be needed. Overall, your post is very thorough and highly detailed, its not often I get to read something so defined and in-depth as this, it really does show that you've thought about almost everything.

It would be nice to be able to read this piece of lore and offer some form of feedback, however because of the size and colour of the text I am unable to withstand even 10 seconds of reading it. For the meanwhile I'll extract the text and read it a little laterlater, but it would be nice to not have to manually extract a piece of text from the forum in order to read it. Thanks!