monkeypoacher

1 hour ago, TryaxReck said:

ban all forms of roleplay bc none of you people are able to use critical thinking 


let me romance rp in peace its all i have now I don't have noble or spook friends to invite me to cool cliques 

tryax buddy it's alright we're going to get you out of this slump 

18 minutes ago, hateful boomer said:

The “mental development” thing isn’t even strictly true, it’s purely a cultural enforcement. 90% of elves act like kids either way cuz they’re played by kids. Beyond that I got no horse in this race 

i have seen it roleplayed both ways because it's a not particularly well-explained cultural tradition. seen people who really should know better playing a "physically mature" elf with the brain of a child, for reasons I am sure you can infer from context

and yes I would rather have the kids on this server not involved in romantic scenarios to begin with, but the demographics of this server (socially isolated, awkward early teens who are into roleplay) make it an inevitability as long as we permit it at all. we should just state clearly that we do not tolerate romantic roleplay and ban it proactively so that we don't end up with some kids on the wrong side of a witch hunt for "cultural pedophilia" or some other fantastic nonsense

14 minutes ago, ᴜɴᴡɪʟʟɪɴɢʟʏ said:

 

I never said we should start labeling 12 year olds as pedophiles, nobody thinks that. I think we're all pretty aware of the fact that new players are most often younger and should be granted leniency when they make these mistakes. Don't get me wrong, I and many other players agree that people who roleplay 30 year old elves as teenagers or even toddlers is just as strange, but a 30 year old elf is still not culturally an adult, and have free reign to date a 300 year old elf since the server rules allow it. That's the focal point of this post

this "elven age of consent/maturity" thing isn't really an idiom in the community like people who have done years of sweaty dominion rp probably think it is. is a 300 year old elf dating a 30 year old elf weird? absolutely. should we have to worry about any of this to begin with? no

*wins

(roll 20?)

A man rises on a soapbox and preaches loudly to Providence City's square, as men are often wont to do in a time of spiritual confusion.

"Woe be unto those who - without the sight of our Prophet - draw from his visions their own benighted misconstructions. Woe be unto those who, in the name of the Most High, go out killing Canonists and stealing their lands, and hanging the bodies of God's children on His cross. Those are the men of God! And the world is their right, as holy men. Justice is their right, those whose fists clench in wrath. Glory leads them, those whose hearts swell with pride. Reward is theirs, whose tongues lash out in deceit.

The Deceiver's words find fertile purchase in the minds of men who believe themselves alike God in judgment. Who believe they are peer to Godfrey in pride. Who believe that they may commit faithful acts in untrue spirit, and merely speak the name of God to justify their sins. These are slaves of the Wyrm, and must be chastened for their wrath. It is thus our duty to raise our standards over their walls and drive their coventicle out of our lands, so help us God."

i am going to steal your child and teach him evil magic

A boy in Providence City has vivid daydreams about Sister Silence, his favorite heroine from the broadsides. Cornered by wretched excommunicate agents of the Crown, she draws a stiletto from inside her habit and lands it between the eyes of one. The other two stand in stunned silence, only to be dispatched with a single high kick.

"There will be no reconciliation without meaningful redress for the crimes committed by the Holy See and its high offices. The shameful prevarication and dissimulation of God's judgment. The incitements to violence against fellow Canonists from the altar of peace. The exaltation of heresy, pride, pretenderism, dark magic, and many simple acts of base violence from the pontifical throne. These are crimes which, by their very nature, deny the faithful of Oren communion with the Mother Church. They produce an intolerable conflict between fidelity to the Church and the Canonist virtues of family, loyalty, and humility. 

For a man to sin is natural. For the Pontifex Maximus to sin, from his golden chair at the altar of all of Canondom, is blasphemy unto God. Through his many perfidious instances, Yaromir of Hanseti-Ruska has borne false witness, he has exalted pride and wrath, he has conspired with the temporal rulers of this world to humiliate and dispossess many faithful Canonists from their lands, all for a bitter and ignoble struggle for political supremacy. This is a great sin that cannot be ignored. It must be cleansed from every nave and every altar. 

This sin ferments spiritual pollution in the Mother Church. The debasement of high office necessarily brings about corruption in the lower offices; it exalts sin, so that the flock is in possession of sinners (Auspice 1:11-13, exegesis). Complicit are the Curia of the Canon in Yaromir's blasphemy and conspiracy. So too are the many low ordainments which have been made to support the political aims of the Curia: the priest who winds to and fro through the countryside, fomenting the faithful to hatred and wrath, the holy knight who goes off in brigandage in the name of God.

These men are plagues on the spiritual health of Canondom. For Tylos II to mend the growing schism he must stop up the ill humors at the heart; excise the many venomous and corrupted spirits from his church so that they may be rejected and expelled from the flock.

To that end, he must:

1. Accept the penance of our Emperor, Philip III, and immediately lift the excommunication and interdict placed upon his subjects,
2. Immediately and presumptively redact and nullify all exordiums, writs, and instances of Yaromir,
3. Initiate formal ecclesiastical trials for those liable of heresy, of conspiring to commit violence against canonists, of negligence in their protection of the faithful, and all other crimes committed under Yaromir's pontificate.

Without satisfaction on these terms, there is no meaningful communion between the High Pontiff and the sees of Oren. And yet there is no indication that Tylos II shall take any of these righteous actions. It is far easier to watch from the temple as the fires of an unjust war burn in the houses of man, only to minister among the ashes to the bereaved and the dispossessed. Thus there can be no communion, no reconciliation without rectification. So it shall be for every faithful Canonist in Oren, so help us God."

May God Shield You In Faith,

Henry Joren Salt-Herring

17 minutes ago, JoshBright said:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  Reveal hidden contents

due to targeting, metagaming and power gaming SOME BITS OF THE RP WHERE VOIDED! the girl was only attack by a bandit and  the person in question 'Ambroise Pierre de Rosius' DOES NO EXIST 

 

[spoiler]

sry dude I didn't see your spoiler. edited the post to reflect my character's lack of knowledge of this apparently public but irply private memo. oops!

[/spoiler]

"No quarter to invaders and occupiers," Aubergine glibly states!

12 minutes ago, Valannor said:

And the outrage machine continues to churn. 

 

Over a god damn frog. 

 

UNLOAD

THE
 

TOAD

On 1/17/2022 at 12:12 AM, 1_Language_1 said:

This is quite short.. why did it take so long to come out?

 

 

 

 

Thank god that they're short, honestly. The war rules never needed to be anything more than simple hard-and-fast bullet points. Everything else gets settled in war chats anyways, and it's good to have as few rules as possible to lawyer.

Brandt Toadsdorfer, the leader of the Miner's Plot, began to sweat nervously at the news. Had the wool truly been pulled over his eyes? Had the Baroness and her children not been evaporated in arcane fire, as his co-conspirators insisted?

He anxiously re-read his correspondence with the Orenian Government. His attempts to charter the Dobrov Motherlode had been stalled in the courts, placed under indefinite review due to the proceedings of the War. He needed proof of heir Fyodor Carrion's signature, but Fyodor infamously reclusive. Scouts sent to Dobrov found no trace of him, nor, unsettlingly, anyone at all.

Now he had hundreds of pallets of pickaxes and equipment floating on a clipper in Providence Harbor, and several dozen miners milling about N.P.C. in increasing agitation at their lack of pay. But now that rumors of that infernal castle were swirling around Providence, even exponential issuances of promissory scrip could not buy their continued loyalty. Was his whole house of cards about to topple down?

He looked in the silver mirror that sat beside his desk in the attic of Hope Annex. His face was the hue and sheen of melting tallow. The cloak and dagger sat on a nearby stool, its blade reflecting a rare beam of sunlight. It was taunting him, beckoning as he milled impotent circles, hunched over in the cramped garret, coy glimmer assuring - there was only one thing left to do now.

Empress Theodora Augusta Anne Carolina Dakota Ulyssa Maria Horen bows three times in the direction of Karosgrad, site of the Holy See, in deference to the will of the Vicar of God.

"NO" says Aubergine.

"Long may they splinter." Says Alderman Aubergine, dipping a cracker in whipped smoked trout and washing the salty snack down with a draught of fine Red Auvergnat.

MC Name:

         common_carp

Character's Name:

         Baozhen Yehenara

Character's Age:

         i forget

What feat(s) will you be learning?

         Alchemy

Teacher's MC Name:

         Quailheart

Teacher's RP Name:

         Leihana Sirame (partial OOC Oversight)

Do you agree to keep Story updated on the status of your feat app?:

         Yep!

Have you applied for this feat on this character before, and had it denied? If so, link the app:

         N/A

Are you aware that if this feat is undergoing an activity trial and fails said trial, that you will lose the feat? And that if it is apart of the Lore Games, it might drastically change soon?:

         Yep!

"The Empire pledges its swords," said Herod Harrenid, who is in no way qualified to pledge the Empire's swords, "We must be ready to defend Canonism to the death - even if Canonism will be the death of us!"

11 minutes ago, space warlord organ trader said:

I’d be all for smuggling rp but kinda impossible to do w/ zero ways to get into a 300000 foot walled city that has been optimized to keep people out even when it looks like shit forcing you to the front gate

 

kinda impossible to do smuggling rp if city leads care more about dollhouse than injecting another aspect of narrative I.e. crime into their settlements !!

This is an entirely separate issue!!!

Also lying to the guard works like 70% of the time just tell them you're unarmed and watch as Elysium roleplayers are terrified of confrontation

5 minutes ago, ᴜɴᴡɪʟʟɪɴɢʟʏ said:

Yeah they would disarm you but I'm pointing out that it's not something that people can actually monitor effectively, because there is literally zero way to keep track of it without some over-the-top process, so people instead tend to make up their own rules to bypass having to actually put any effort into enforcing their city's safety without having to worry about losing out on activity

Yeah, I know it doesn't make perfect sense in RP. But most things don't on this server. Yes, it breaks a footnote rule, but so do a lot of staff verdicts. It's just such an incredibly silly thing to tell players they can't do - I can't be nice to someone and not take their items when I disarm them? 

I could also keep track of people's weapons with chests and signs, it's just the inconvenience of both of us having to be on at the same time - which is not an issue of RP enforcement - that makes this untenable. I have no idea if I'm going to have to log off in 20 minutes when the guy wants to leave. But I could also just build a "weapons locker" adjacent to the gatehouse that players could publicly access, do /cprivate myname theirname, and then let them pick it up on the way out. It's a solvable issue, people just found the path of least resistance.

When I tried to roleplay a corrupt city watchman and relieve magic roleplayers of their special enchanted contraband I was faced with players who would get so apoplectic about their special carbarum-lunarite-diamond alloy swords being taken off their person that I was basically forced to say "okay just don't RP having it buddy" to get them to stop chimping out OOCly. So there's that, too. What you're complaining about is just a convenient workaround that you do not have to participate in. You can always give your items away.

19 minutes ago, ᴜɴᴡɪʟʟɪɴɢʟʏ said:

If u somehow have never seen certain nations do this then it sounds like a u problem at that point

I have, I just don't see the issue? Any reasonably well-managed town on Almaris realistically would disarm you at the gates. Crossbow violence is an epidemic. If you want to toss someone your items instead of just RPly agreeing that some of them have been removed from your person and sent to hammerspace that's your prerogative. If you want to smuggle weapons into a town you should do it in RP instead of telling people that they can't guard their towns in a certain way.

If anything, I think the /search command is really game-y and doesn't represent how a guy would be able to search me for weapons through 4 feet of iron bar reinforced concrete and voidal-proof glass, but that's apparently not the issue you have

IGN: MonkeyPoacher

Dicord: carp#1818

Persona Name: C. Melongenus Nephus

Persona Race: Human
Persona Sex: Male

Persona Age: 29

Position: Stablemaster

Letter:

... Dear Praefectus Cabinet,

My name is Cyril Melongenus Nephus. I am writing not to grovel for a position in your ranks (a letter which I am sure you often receive, oho!) but to humbly ask to continue my service to the Savoyard state. Before my religious retreat I was the humble keeper of the stables of San Luciano, and a scholar in horse breeding and equestrianism. My able hands delivered foals that grew into the personal steeds of the late Olivier Renault and of the unfortunately mutinous Blackwald Company, and it would be a personal penance to continue breeding horses for the Argent Legion. Given a few years' time, I would be able to provide one brave charger or swift courser to each of your cavaliers, free of charge, as a serjeants-service to the Crown of Savoy. I ask only to have your official recognition of my ownership of the stables, so that I can ensure my livelihood - my mares and stallions - are not abused or unduly taken. 

Yours in camradery, 

Cyril

Aubergine de la Baltas mounts the rostrum at City Hall, fitted in full regalia of the Captain of the Watch (a position to which he was honorarily appointed), to deliver a speech:

"Southbridge. Southbridge will be the chestnut that cracks the tooth of the foraging hog. Fight bravely, dear citizens, for your very homes and homesteads, for every buxom peasant matron who weeps for her slain boy. By the grace of God, on this day, we will not yield a single inch of Imperial loam!"

Alderman Aubergine de la Baltas wonders if he, too, will be banished back to San Luciano. A great fright overcomes him at the thought of returning to his beloved Taffeta, having left the southern citadel without so much as a word goodbye. Sweat soaks his suit as he sits in the fitting room, obsessively dabbing a handkerchief on his glistening head, repeating feverishly as he stared at the tailor's cloths ..

"The switchel, the searing scourge of the swatch... The swishing, slashing scourge of the silk swatch .."