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About monkeypoacher

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    Diamond Miner
  • Birthday 01/01/2018

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    Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan
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    Fatty Peach Dog
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  1. why is it that posts in the "Holy Orenian Empire" subforum need to be approved

  2. Aubergine de la Baltas fingered through bolts of lush Sutican Seersucker, admiring the bright yet subtle coloring, the soft thread of the light fabric - perfect for enjoying a balmy afternoon fishing on the Sava river, or savoring a belt of apple brandy as the sun set over the foggy dwarven mountains. ".. Any of these will do," he tells his tailor, knowing he had nothing to prove. Whatever he wore, he'd look sharper than any powdered syphilitic from the Augustine Court.
  3. "... Yes?" The wizened mountebank answered, eyes peering through the thick fog just long enough to recognize another human face. Though he was almost gone, his mind too far lost inside itself to come up with a quip - though he was in a foreign land, wheeled out here and there to ends he could no longer understand, - he knew with one thing with complete conviction and clarity. He had something the False Duke lacked, something he could never be sure of; He knew exactly who he was. He was a Clown, a man bound by neither the strictures of legitimacy nor the tired mores of nobility. He was a descendant of the Old Clownstbuergers, a witness to the mirthless horrors of the Long Joke and his own father's slow death by the vices of Helena. He was a sinner, a penitent, a father, and though his proud heritage was founded more on pretense than reality, he was more Adrian than any of Providence City's lace-wearing bewigged mongrels.
  4. i am more than an ascended void wizard. something to be truly feared and loathed... a dead by daylight player it would be cool to have void magic rewritten into something greater than a garbage bin category for generic d&d evocation. if the void is really supposed to be this terrifying alter realm and a source of otherworldly power, as many people try to write it, it should be characterized as such, themes of corruption and power and all. a permanent, gruesome CA transformation isn't a bad way to do that imo hard agree with what you're saying here
  5. "Who?" An elderly Ves patrician repeated, gumming the word out over and over as he read each name on the list. An attendant of the TRUE and HONEST Duke of Adria would then wheel him into a closet, where he would continue for several hours.
  6. ves republican army (VRA) crashed the forums

    1. Publius


      Okay... But they're a terrorist group??

  7. To Phil Novellen Jr., The nature of human history is cyclical. Fortune’s wheel is ever revolving, spinning each man’s fate into her grand design. Names are forgotten and then remembered, roles are concluded and reprised, and there is rhyme, but no reason to all of it. Only one thing is certain: those who are atop the wheel must descend, so those below it may arise. I say this not as a threat, but a warning; such is the immutable nature of a story that does not end. To your letter, I must rebut that our pedigree also holds great men. Men like Timeo de la Baltas, who was cut down carrying news of the Mad Emperor’s betrayal to the countryside. Men like Sun Watanabe, who led the charge of the Ves Watch into Helena and never returned. Women like Bernadette Galvus, whose passions led her to defy the most bloodthirsty and overbearing tyrant in human history, and the countless other citizens whose stories are woven into the tapestry of man. The tapestry is too great for any man to comprehend, and to claim any more than one’s own thread is abject folly. This is why I am so interested in your letter, Phil Novellen. As an Sarkozic and Pertinaxi scion, are you not well-versed in your own genealogy? Have you not seen your own family tree, as broad as the mast of a warship, scrawled with endless and twisting roots? How can you claim to be the heir of any great man - to the exclusion of anyone else? Surely any man can claim to be the Duke of Adria or the Emperor of Oren, and such is the necessity of our laws and tradition. Succession, property, parliamentary procedure - all which you have trampled with your illegal primogeniture and preposterous Duma. A meagre ten nephews and hangers-on do not silence our three score, just as one thread does not make the tapestry. To you, and the Emperor your predecessor, you stand at a crossroads. Your nation heaves its numbered, rattling gasps - as its legislators and secretaries piddle away behind a thick curtain, ignorant and ineffectual to the real world. Your Empire has already lost Haense, lost Sedan, lost Savoy, and lost Adria. It has lost all of the proud peoples who were left outside the high palace walls. Yet the Augustine has done nothing but watch, its inhabitants staring out with longing hearts, as its power diminishes and its name is mocked and unheeded. At this crucial moment, will history remember you as the man who quibbled over a titular title? Whose ‘Empire’ was reduced to a single city before his eyes, then a single palace? I pray that you find the wisdom and the courage to concede in this pointless and self-destructive squabble. A. de la Baltas Representative of the Grand Adrian Duma
  8. Aubergine de la Baltas is troubled by the letter. Where would he find a tailor on such short notice? What would he wear? The pinstripe suit hung ominously in the closet.
  9. these are extremely based changes thank you
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