herculean_wud
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Posts posted by herculean_wud
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didnt read the post but i agree
i also hate magic and druids but in a based and non-cringe way.
3 -
5 hours ago, MailC3p said:
Baron Arthur read the missive from the Providence gatehouse, a confused look comes over his face as he read it.
"Imagine losing a war that you declared so badly so early into the war that you make a missive when you kill 1 man with 100, when within the last 48 saint hours, we've killed 2,600 of your own kind."
"literally" says fishbref recalling dwarven 1 kill posting.
3 -
says Fishbref
6 -
AN URUK, since cast from his home, trawled through desert sands. His robes rippled in the wind - a chill from the north - that carried with it a great many of these flyers. He read one amongst the many with amusement, "There is only one conception of honour. That which can be successfully defended with tusk and steel." He screwed it up and threw it back into the wind and continued, homeward bound.
2 -
"Dis is very based." Says Leydluk from the Spirit Realm, recalling the kinship - and the rivalry - that he and his brothers had shared with this once mighty clan!
3 -
Fishbref cheers, but he doesn't know what for!
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"I HATE THE ANTI CHRIST" says fishbref raguk from exile at this most cowardly of actions.
2 -
Leydluk grimaces.
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biglipz II, holy knight of King John, disapproves as another false religion attempts to usurp fleeperdom...
he says a prayer to holy st. clownth so that he may intercede on his behalf...
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"Lat wasted all lat time writing dat for a single ork? Who isn't even Snagagoth. Yikes." Says the Targoth.
8 -
this but unironically.
people be out here making flesh demons, building steam ships, having cannons on their boats
but reskinned crossbow?
too much..
i hope allah (swt) strikes the ST down for their stupidity
4 -
i hope you [redacted] a violent [redacted].
2 -
ayo when da nottingham london meet up ?
i havemt got pay pigs like schnub..
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((why do you cringelords always get pvp fleep number 134 with throwaway character to fight on ur behalf instead of just doing it urself.
"Kukavice! Kukavicluk od naj vece proporcije!" Tutted Mirko Chetnik, having been one of two non-high elves in the party, and having come by his own accord and by no one's request, "Cowards! I have expecting of no less from knife-ear."
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FISHBREF’S RODENT REMOVER
ARE LARGE, PERHAPS BEARDED, RODENTS BUILDING TUNNELS INTO YOUR CITY AND BOTHERING YOU?
THEN WORRY NO MORE!
FISHBREF’S RODENT REMOVER IS AN ECONOMICAL AND FAST WORKING SOLUTION FOR ALL YOUR RODENT REMOVING NEEDS.
HAPPY CUSTOMERS:
“Screams in the tunnel lasted an hour or two. No problems since.” - Hu-Din
“It definitely got rid of them!” - Kretz’Ox
“Let's make more loofahs!” - Grishluk’Raguk
(Purchasable at Krugmar, Fishbref Incorporated is not responsible for any injury in the use of this product, keep away from small children, terms and conditions apply)
16 -
37 minutes ago, Lady_Dietz said:
Yazmorra Blackroot picks up the bloodied, crumpled missive from her husband’s desk “Ahhh so t’ey ‘call an end’ tu teh conflict, eh? Funneh fokkin’ way ov showin’ eet uruks.” She smirks, puffing her herbaceous cigar “Try sendin’ ah fruit basket next toime.” She blows out a cloud of smoke, leaning back as she recalls her many travels to Krugmar for ‘business.’ “An’ may Anbella keep yer precious cactus green safe frum Dungrimm’s moight!”
"Dats how dis usually work - lat skah wit us, we slap lat a bunch ov tikz, den when dat get boring, we kall for peace." Says the Targoth to no one in particular.
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Spoiler
THE GREAT DEBEARDING
OF BAKIR, LORD IREHEART
Commotion drew brothers, sisters, snagas, honouraries and guests from near and far flung regions to the fire pit. A disgraced warrior would be put on trial, after all. In normal circumstances, an esteemed urukish warrior would fight the accused in a duel of honour -- but the dwarf would be granted no such privilege for his multiplicity of transgressions. Instead, a tribunal would be called -- to be held before witnesses, spiritual and temporal, with Targoth Fishbref as judge, and his attendant brothers as jury.
“Lord Ireheart is to be found guilty of the crime of refusing an honour duel levied by a sitting Targoth. All those in agreement say ‘yub’!”
A litany of ‘yubs’ followed.
“Lord Ireheart is to be found guilty of the crime of warmongering and sowing discord among the descendant races! All those in agreement say ‘yub’!”
A litany of ‘yubs’ followed.
“Lord Ireheart is to be found guilty of disturbing worship and matters spiritual! All those in agreement say ‘yub’!”
A litany of ‘yubs’ followed.
Targoth Hu-din stepped forward to render and deliver his punishment. It was decided that his beard would be removed -- his face as bare as his dishonour, for all the world to see. But, he would not be executed. Instead, the uruks would be merciful. Where they could have forced him down a mine, or quartered him brutally, they instead allowed him to leave with no more scratches on him than when he was captured. For where Iblees had cursed them with bloodlust, Krug had given them an honourable way of life to follow.
And so, the Ireheart went on his way, now a few grams lighter, and as naked faced as when he was born.
The next day, a missive would arrive at the dwarven hold:
“Hear us, ye of Urguan,
You have brought nothing but disgrace upon your people. You levy bandits and petty raiders to bolster your armies, and have failed in all but one of your incursions upon our lands.
We, kin of Krug, call an end to this conflict. Cease all hostilities and return to us the Fort of Ireheart and no more shall dwarven blood be spilt.
Fail to fulfil our demands and more dwarven bodies will enrich the soil upon which we tread.
We eagerly await your response.”
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THE FESTIVAL OF BETHARUZ
AND CLAN FAIR
KRUGMAR, VIBRANT WITH LIFE
Leaflets flew far and wide informing the descendant races of a festival to be held in Krugmar at the end of the Cactus Year. To the brothers and sisters of Krugmar, this information was delivered to them by a particularly shrill goblin crier.
“Come one! Come all! Come Brothers! Come Sisters!
At the end of this Cactus Week we will gather here in festivity! Betharuz has frowned upon us for our austerity -- the green plants wilt and the grog has gone foul. But no longer!
O great Betharuz, ye shall have our praise! And in your honour the WORLD CACTUS will be grown and its fruits enjoyed! There will be games, food, grog and green; no uruk will be permitted to be miserable!
We will also be hosting a CLAN FAIR for the clanless Brothers to learn more of the Clans. Opportunities will also be had for uruks and citizens of Krugmar, as well as other descendant races, to levy any grievances or suggestions with the Rex!
Wallow no more O brethren of Krugmar, your blades will not dull after a night of festivities!
MINIMUM HEIGHT TO ENTER: 5'1'' NOT INCLUDING HALFLINGS AND SMALL CHILDREN. TERMS AND CONDITIONS APPLY.”
SATURDAY 24TH
CLAN FAIR - 3PM EST
FESTIVAL - 4PM EST
BE THERE OR BE SQUARE
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48 minutes ago, Treaty said:
Azkel is surprised to see the lust for war having left the "War-nation" of Krugmar "Guess daht afteh losing both raids on Urguan and raids on deir home turf dey've jus' given up foighting all togetheh?"
"dis happened when?"
says
fishbref
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"Kapitalism agh Sanoism are da great subvertaz ov Tradition, agh originated from da ignoble agh cunning knife-eared race." Says Evola'Raguk.
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10 minutes ago, Elite_Snipes_ said:
Bakir Ireheart comes out of the Krugmar woods covered in blood, his left hand holding a dozen orcish heads severed from their body "What? Orcs winning a battle? But they sacrifice a dozen of their own? Horrible trade off!"
A HUNDRED YEARS IN THE FUTURE...
The Preserved Footprint of a Fleeing Ireheart
Elven archaeologists made twisted faces at the bootprint embedded in the sediment of the Krugmaric jungle. They knew it was of Dwarven origin -- but it was a strange place for one, in the heartland of where the Uruks once called home. After mulling over records they soon deduced it was from the Battle of San'Velku and belonged to an Ireheart dwarf of insignificant standing who turned and fled at the might of uruk kind, never even landing a single sword blow!
((i didnt catch you at the fight elite! such a shame you waited 2hrs nearly and didnt get to click :/ maybe next time...
23 -
THE BATTLE OF SAN’VELKU
11th of the First Seed, S.A. 32
The historic standard of the Krughai
Deep below the city of San’Velku, the uruks of Krugmar -- silent in mourning and prayer -- prepared the body of a fallen brother for his arrival at Kor’s great gate. The process was bittersweet -- bitter because the passing of a brother never came easy, but sweet because they had heard tall tales of what waited for him in the afterlife.
As this brother’s lifeless corpse drifted ever onwards towards the Stargush’Stroh and made its final passage, a low drumming disturbed the uruks. It was slow at first. Slow and steady -- like groundwater escaping from a stalactite. But it grew louder and louder, until the prayerful brothers were disturbed from their silent contemplation. Eventually it was too loud to ignore. Some brothers recognised it instantly, others -- starved of combat -- strained their ears so that they could deduce what it was. It was the sound of boots marching in lockstep -- and the gruff highland drawl of Dwarven warriors.
Rogue uruks displaced by the instability over the decades, or indeed those who had turned their back on Krugmar, had wronged the honourable men of Urguan. But the residual hubris of previous conflict guided the Dwarves’ feet and their hearts -- they brought swords where they should have brought words and understanding. It had been decided before they even stepped foot on Orkish soil -- they wanted blood for blood.
Thus it would be, as it had been for centuries! A battalion of Krugmar and a battalion of Urguan stood before one another -- evenly matched in men and arsenal. The King and his Generals on one side, the Rex and his Targoths on the other. With a raucous cry, the good men of Uruk and Dwarf kind clashed -- just as their fathers had done before them, painting the square blood-red with the essence of the fallen.
The warriors of Krugmar emerged from the fray and claimed their victory. Bittersweet, but a victory nevertheless.
GF and thanks for the sportsmanship!
25
THE MANDATE OF HEAVEN
in Human Realms & Culture
Posted
"Wub da skah." Remarks Fishbref, fugitive, as he walked past the Orenian 'milking' a steer. He muttered something about Orenians and their strange behaviours as he went out of earshot.