Thrawn

its not about "bad guy but not really", theyre objectively bad and vile but they just dont believe they are

Depends on what sort of villain you want to play. An abusive parent is a villain, an evil arch-wizard is a villain, a common street thief is also a villain, but they can all be a 'good' villain.

My main suggestion is make providing a story and interesting rp the focus, and be fine with losing or having the purpose shift.

My main character was originally intended to be a villain, but was turned away from that by his interactions with good people. My favorite villains I've seen have been basically player-controlled NPCs with mini events where they do petty crime like steal someone's sweet rolls. Neither requires fancy magics and powergaming to do, just have fun with it and create fun, non-stressful situations for others. Good luck.

play an illatian, do crime, become mayor, do more crime. bam, very good villain