Mannamannaa

AGREED (you will never know if I am meming or serious about this topic)

Kor'garr, Skriptgoth of the Horde, raises his brow in surprise as he reads over this interview with the leader of Canonism. A tusked grin spreads beneath a thick handlebar mustaches before he lets out a harsh chuckle.

"Wehl dun, yub... Wuld hav prifeerd tu peep dah originul zkript uv dah intervyu en ikzakt wurdz, buht ztyll wehl dun. Whu iz diz... Jon uv clan O'Kieran? Dey moight bi'ag hozh imployee." With that question uttered the Kaktuz Weekli owner begins to draft up a letter for the Ward of Tuvia...

Translation

[OOC] Wonderful Lore/Culture piece and I appreciate the more nuanced take on Monotheism/Creator origin story that allows more cohesiveness with LotC history as a whole. It's clear you put a lot of effort and thought into the Soaring Faith. Great job!

Kor'garr, Skriptgoth of the Iron Ugz, grins despite the weariness of his frame upon hearing of this new lesser. His mustache gleams with sweat and grime from the caverns underneath Almaris, and yet...

"Lup'Ublulhar, agh Lup'Ahura-Ma, daht awl zhakulz uv znagadum ahr broken en grukker agh ztrength!"

When I made that malding post in Lobby chat on LotC discord it was a JOKE.

I... I am actually baffled by this.

Who thought they would get away with it?

YESSSSSSSS I SUPPORT THIS

TOTALLY DIDN'T HELP PROOFREAD

LUB PANASHEA, LUB LORE

I am so happy to see this hub post made! I would like to add "On the Blah"

Love new clan lore!!!!

[Will respond soon, too heartstruck to make a god IRP reply atm]

【♢ -♢- ♢】

Bundles of newspapers would be spread throughout Almaris for all to see. While written  vividly upon dense sheets of... mediocre parchment? Anyways, pages of blocky script seem less formatted and many illustrations are absent! The floral berry smell of jungle inks wafts pleasantly from each heavy page. This must be...

【♢ -♢- ♢】

THE KAKTUZ WEEKLI
Issue H'azh (VI), 226 S.A.

[[ Due to Waghtik Damages agh Complications the Kaktuz Weekli is experiencing delays. Zoggyng Mori bug worshippers. Sieges make it difficult to spend time writing articles!]]

ORCISH AFFAIRS - The Clan Moot: A New Iron Horde!

Kor’garr is delighted to announce that the Iron Horde has entered a new era, that of a Confederacy of the clans with our Rex Ar-Borok’Akaal acting as tiebreaker rather than the Rexdom of years past! Now all honorable lineages of Krugs descendants have a voice in the path our nation will follow. As a brief explanation, government leaders are given Ashtkaar, blessed icons that show proof of their authority. The Rex and leaders of Clans use these Ashtkaar to show their approval and support for decisions, called Claims, presented to the Clan council during Klamors. Klamors are official gatherings of the clans announced with at least azh cactus day of notice. With more members of leadership in their ranks, a Clan has greater say in how the Iron Horde is run. The Rex, of course, is independent of the Clans and has III counts upon their Ashtkaar to prevent draws.

Already the Clan Moot has added the Clans of Raguk, Yar, agh Ixtzul to our ranks of Recognized lineages in the Horde. Many changes and decisions have proceeded smoothly, agh Kor’garr is glad even the older elders like Murdok’Lak agh Madoc’Lur approve of this new type of leadership. As Ar-Borok’Akaal wrote in the public declaration “A New Horde”:
 

The Iron Horde is not a Rexdom like the Wagh Nation of ages past, and from now on our ancestors in the Stargush will watch their descendants speak freely for the sake of their Clans instead of a single ruler.

ORC KULTURE - Grog agh Grub
On the Krugmarian Delicacy of Fresh High Albai

Krugmar culinary tradition states that Elven meat, specifically High Elven meat, is a delicacy, and for a number of reasons. First is due to the intense tenderness and supple softness compared to any other meat no matter the age or cooking method: the Elven blessing of immortality prevents repeated strain and stiffening other meats go through as a living being grows and matures. Much like Veal, except you can have the taste and size of a mature Twiggie while also keeping the tenderness. Similarly palatial diets and court lifestyles generally develop fruity undertones and healthier layers of fat compared to other descendants of Malin, which makes a wonderful choice for sweeter cuts and recipes akin to bacon or pork belly. This sort of Umami is very rare to the harshly spiced and generally savory orcish diet, hence the fascination with High Elven ingredients in dishes!

The other main reason is simple: history and supply. High Albai live mojo infused lifestyles and thus have richer mojo reserves than most others, another secret to their wonderful taste and a frequent temptation towards Burz-mojo Void usage. As orcs are obligated to purge such practices for the Spirits, High elves and Krug's kind have fought frequently… meaning the opportunity to partake in such exquisite meals remains consistent to this day.

So what dishes are commonly made with High Albai, lat might ask Kor'garr? Everything from the Raw Orcish Delight mentioned in previous articles to choice cuts of perfectly seared Highsteak (soft and wonderfully marbled)! Twikkon is a common dawnlit snack on expeditions or in the blarg, being thin strips cooked with oil over an open flame… Quite similar to the Zhara's pork bacon. And of course there are the famous Mysteri Stew amd Kruga Kola, the dubt being said Stew aged for ag decade with cinnamon and vanilla to produce a sizzling, sparkly beverage enjoyed around Almaris.

Most if not all of these recipes are available from the Betharuz Tavern, and fresh ingredients can be sold to the Horde for a hefty sum! 

ORC KULTURE - Olog of the Week

This week Kor'garr is proud to present to lat ag special interview… Azh with a legend, the Olog known as Drekur'Ungri! We covered an old story of his that few remember but all deserve to hear again. Also, Drekur is the pinnacle of his kind in age, size, agh intelligence. Most Ologs would be… Nub'hozh conversation partners. This particular meeting starts with the Olog introducing himself. Please note this is translated to Common with grammar added for ease of reading.

DREKUR: “[Mi] is Aengul slayer, first son of the Maw! Uniter of the Ologs! Lat have questions to say to me?”

Kor’garr: “Kor’garr always has questions… How did lat slay an Aengul anyways? Punch it really hard?”

DREKUR, after laughing: “Aengul slayer will tell lat tale! It all started in War on Arcas! Orcs! Humans! Dwarves! Agh elves! United against the Inferi! Inferi came from a portal on the desert of Al-faiz! Many many demons! More than even a Horde of Ologs could Klomp at once! Quickly the Inferi hordes came, took city of Farfolk like it was nothing! Desert fell quickly to Inferi!”

Kor’garr: “More than the Great Wagh? Excellent time for fighting then.”

DREKUR: “Larger than even the Horde could Wagh! They warred and warred, until even the city of wood elves fell! They reached the mainland then.” *The Olog takes a massive drink of Grog here. “Around this time, children of Brev arrived! Told mi, Drekur’Ungri, and the goblin Murdok’Lak of a great Titan Spear of their father Brev! Weapon able to make gods mortal.”

Kor’garr: “Yub, always wondered what that looked like… Lat remember it still?”

DREKUR: “BAH! Nothing was special when we found it! Just very big! Soon, Orcs fought all over the Al-Faiz desert! Mi and the Ungri Clan were bulwark of the army! Slaughtered many Inferi agh soon faced the Aengul, Gazadriel!”

Kor’garr: “The greatest of fights… Enrohk [the spirit of War and Bloodlust] would be proud.”

DREKUR: “Ungri did not even worship the Maw back then… Foolishness, yub! But doesn’t matter! When Gazadriel was in range! Murdok’Lak agh Drekur’Ungri shot the Spear of Brev into Gazadriel, making the angel mortal, and fatally wounding it!

Kor’garr: “Shot it? As in, using a longbow?”

DREKUR: “Ballista, yub! Flatted the Aengul really hozh! Making mi agh Murdok’Lak aengul slayers!”

Kor’garr: “Thank lat for the wonderful history, friend. Lat is definitely Olog of the Week.”

End of Article

Miscellaneous

BOUNTIES OPEN
Kor’garr presents to lat the Bounty section, a place where lat can bird the Kaktuz Weekli with information on people agh beasts lat want vlat… or alive. If deemed worthy, The Iron Horde or Kaktuz Weekli might decide to match a bounty price in up to 300 minas! Nub worry, Anonymity is accepted for those sending in bounties as well as those who bring in the offending ‘owtlaws’. Heads are generally preferred as proof of the request being completed.


SUPPLIES WANTED

Also, Kor’garr is peeping for Alkemists. The details are attached here.

[!] The Missive is crudely attached... [!]


FINAL NOTES
As Lat Kan peep, The Kaktuz Weekli is hiring Artiztz agh Formatters! Nub experienze Needyd!

STAFF

[!] The following record is kept within the Library of Theruz in San'Velku with copies available anywhere needed for public access. [!]

The Goth Council, Updated CXXVI S.A. By Kor'garr

I also support option B. Alchemy is so pervasive and yet locked behind a feat that not knowing it severely inhibits characters from being able to do cool crafting RP. Of course, my issues with Alchemy as a whole are a different conversation.

The Redlines here are contradictive to the rest of server rulings, let's change them.

[!] An edit is made, written in ink and nailed upon all the public missives! [!]

A deal has been made for number Dub (II) on the list with the craftsman of Sands.

[!] The following record is kept within the Library of Theruz in San'Velku with copies available anywhere needed for public access. [!]
The Goth Council, Updated CXXV S.A. By Kor'garr

 

[!] The announcement below has been nailed upon noticeboards within the Iron Horde and mailed out to any with mercantile connections. Dense parchment is blotted with blocky letters in heavy ink. [!]

 

Requesting Goods: Alchemists and Tinkers Wanted!
 

To all that peep this message, Kor’garr the Clanless is seeking a variety of supplies in preparation for future endeavors. Prices will be hozh, agh negotiable, especially for custom made crafts. The Skriptgoth of the Iron Horde currently seeks:

I: Packets of the dust known as Flash Powder, color irrelevant. Willing to buy in bulk, more is better.

II: A set of Heat-Peeping goggles or similar lenses, wearable under a large helm and sized for an Uruk.

III: Bottles of the concoction grukked as Tactical Greaser.

IV: Luminosity potions, Arkenlight, agh other longlasting unquenchable sources of brightness.

V: Vials of Bottled Charm or other animal attractors or baits.

VI: Bottles of Air and Liquid Purifier.

If lat has any item not mentioned on this list that could be helpful to Kor’garr, please feel free to send a bird in advance. The Skriptgoth is available in Blarg 0 of San’Velku, and will respond promptly to any delivered messages.
 

For Truth agh Honor,
Kor’garr the Clanless
Skriptgoth of the Iron Horde

Allowing previously accepted elements of Magic to become accessible again by their community is Hozh. I support this.

Happy for the Druii!

Thank you greatly for being clear and outspoken with your position and goals as a member of Staff. I love this forward thinking and hope to see it spread throughout LotC as a whole.

Kor'garr the Clanless, Skriptgoth, growls as a small banner is torn down from the bookshelf within his tower. Images of unblinking eyes are thrown into fires, and only the fact his new Warhammer, Zhell'zmazha, does not have the Deceiver of Forbidden Knowledge's name inscribed prevents him from deciding to abandon the new weapon. Shaking hands carefully organize Jabbernak feather quills and bottles of brightly hued ink despite the perpetual rage coursing through grey veins.

"Ixli iz Kurzed. Der muzt bi riplazement tu karry dah Truth uv dah Ugz... Muzt vynd new zpirit. Lezzer bikome Greytur, azh daht iz Honorabul..." Kor'garr continues to mutter under his breath as he searches for records of some lesser spirit trustworthy of taking upon themselves the mantle of Truth.

Perhaps the STUDENT and TEACHER would find a Champion within the Horde if such an orc was made aware of their discovery and pact?

 

Don't make the Kaktuz Weekli go on strike oocly over this pls.

Tech Team I will pay money for this to get fixed.

[!] A message is written In vivid jungle inks, carried by Krugmarian courier Hark to the underground fortress of Urguan [!]

To the Honorable smiths of the Dwed,

Kor'garr the Clanless has heard of lat's discovery and the quest taken by mi hozh friend, Garedyn of the Cactus Hue. Kor'garr also obtained a sample of this silvery, not-quite-Ztarmetul material, and as Skriptgoth officially offers Blah to diskover the Truth of this newfound implement of Wagh. Using our blessed spirit forge, Kor'garr has created a capstone for his Wagh-Hammer 'Zhell'zmazha', agh it has been quite effective so far. This... Alamantum (as it shares color with the Alabaster Leef), or as lat call it Mithril, is a wonderful discovery.

May we meet tusk to beard for a conversation on this opportunity for shared artisanship?

Let the Forge Burn Eternal,
Kor'garr the Clanless

I LOVE THIS! WONDERFULLY DONE DRAS!

Kor'garr hums in thought, nodding after a few moments. 

"Grimruk iz hozh, agh wyze. Kor'garr wyll zupport diz en dah nekzt Klamor. Lup'Votar, mey wi git bak awl owur mizzing hunterz."

MC Name:

         M4nnam4nnaa

Character's Name:

         Kor'garr

Character's Age:

         150

What feat(s) will you be learning?

         Lutaumancy

Teacher's MC Name:

         ColonelSoberFunk

Teacher's RP Name:

         Qudlia Jusmia

Do you agree to keep Story updated on the status of your feat app?:

         Yes

Have you applied for this feat on this character before, and had it denied? If so, link the app:

         No

Are you aware that if this feat is shelved, it will be unavailable to use?

         Yes