CharmingCavalier

Henry Penton sat in his office at night, muttering over a crowded desk of papers. He was alone, in faith and peace. He offered a simple prayer to God on high: "Lord, come what may, I ask for your guidance and wisdom during these trying times. Every great act of Your magnificence can be traced to kneeling men, not those who stand. May You guide me, and help me, O' Lord. Amen." With that the old man, the top of his head shining in the candlelight, closed his books. He stood to leave before an aide rushed in, "another missive, Mister Penton!" The old man snarled, snatching at it. He threw it on his desk, marching off. "What I should have prayed for is one damn night of sleep in this world!"

Peter Augustus d’Arkent stood and read the letter before looking around at the room of tutors. “This doesn’t make any sense. First the Fedei Defensor trusts letters written by literal lizard people and now they publish a letter not written by my grandfather but with his signature tacked onto its tail? We are better than this, surely? Civilization becomes uncivilized once more.” He returned to his studies but shook his head.

AN ANNOUNCEMENT FROM THE IMPERIAL TIMEKEEPER ASSOCIATION CLICK HERE The need for the accurate accounting of time transcends borders. It is a connecting thread that binds all people together, and never ceases. As the Imperial Timekeeper Association, it is our duty to provide functional timekeeping services to the Empire, but also for all who do business with our Empire. Furthermore, at the request of many clocksmiths, merchants, and government officials from the Kingdom of Hanseti-Ruska, we have developed a clock that adequately translated Imperial Standard Time into the Sigmundic Calendar. Therefore, it is with great privilege and humility that we present this timepiece to His Royal Majesty's court, government, and society for seamless coordination of time. May it hang in your bank or halls for many years to come.

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Finals - Week 6 Season 1 A BATTLE FOR BUCKETBALL! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Where we left off last week, the season's final game had just ended, but there was no time for celebration by the victors or sorrow for the loser. These two championship teams were swiftly confronted by an undead team, including liches and other abominations. They sought to challenge the Dunes and the Saints for the game of bucketball itself. Our spectators, officials, and commentators were trapped behind towering walls of flames shooting from the either, obscuring their view and any aid they might have given. Without coaches or referees, the so-called Saintly Dunes will have to come together to save us all or risk the championship and its trophy sinking back underground with the spooks of Almaris! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Heith-Hedran Hoopsters - Almarisian Saintly Dunes As Hakim approached the tip-off line, he looked to the lady with the pink hair, confused by what was about to happen. He asked, "were you the pink-haired lady everyone has been warning about?" She smirked and, without a notice, chucked the ball high into the air, a lich making a ghastly noise as he levitated off the ground to grasp the ball and shoot the ball straight into the bucket; three points for the undead. For decrypt beings, they moved with such finesse, much to the surprise of the Saintly Dunes. The one lich with a tarnished crown swiftly intercepted pass after pass to Herakles from Zaina Al-Hamad and Istvan. Even when Istvan got close to scoring with a layup, dribbling around the skeleton-lord in a white cloak, the pink-haired lady muttered words that instantly sealed the bucket. As the ball slowly rolled to the side and off the court, the players looked at one another with exhaustion on their faces. What could be done against such blatant rule-breaking?! As half-time came, the score was ten to fifty-nine, in favor of the undead who had told them their name was the Hoopsters. Herakles and Hakim looked to their teams and sighed. It all seemed to be futile against such magically-abusive players. As they walked to the tip-off line, expecting another half as the one they had just played, a woosh could be heard from the side of the court. In a breach of the fire walls stood the Saint's Cheer Captain, Selvia de Orsella, a cannon smoking under her. And from that hole stepped the other teams of the ABA, their colorful uniforms accompanied by weapons of all sorts and sizes. The Lady of Pink hissed at them, "this isn't fair?! What are you doing?! This is our game to win?!" Herakles grabbed the ball from her and said, "no, this is our game!" And with that, the most recognizable ABA players charged forth, using weapons to counter the magical abilities with sheer force. Grigory Grubb was seen using a club to bash the knees of the grotesque skin monster, while Lanqui used his height to crash a gigantic war hammer into the head of the pink-haired lady. Gulmon and Gib passed the ball through the legs of a lich, knocking their skeletal remains to the ground with a boney clatter as they hung to the bucket over top of him. Lulubelle Starbreaker was seen on the back of Rakothurz swinging morning stars and even managing to catch the pink-haired lady in the face. When the dust settled, the liches and undead were seen crawling back into the hole from whence they had emerged. The pink-haired lady shouted back at the victorious ballers, "this won't be the last time you hear from us! We'll be back and claim your idiotic championship next season!!!" The ballers looked between themselves and nodded, the crowd erupting into a deafening screech as the fire cleared the way to an all-star cast of the ABA. From the sidelines ran the coaches of both teams, who shook hands. And finally, a monk delivered the championship trophy into the hands of Hakim 'the Brickwall' of the Dunes. He hoisted it high, surrounded by his fellow ballers. VICTORY OVER THE ANTI-BALLING UNDEAD! VICTORY FOR BUCKETBALL! CONGRATULATION TO THE CHAMPIONS OF THE FIRST SEASON OF THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION NEWS ON SEASON 2 BUCKETBALL HAS BEEN SAVED... UNTIL NEXT SEASON?!?! Also, check out our discord below! You'll need it to prepare yourself and your team for season two! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Finals - Week 5 Season 1 THE FINAL GAME! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week is the final week of the ABA's inaugural season. Really, we have to look back at this year's crazy moments and imagine where this all came from. We've lost some people along the way, but the first season made it in the end. All thirty-plus weeks were systematically detailed for your viewing pleasure. Now, I don't know about you, but I am exhausted. My wife has been begging me to spend time with her, or something like that. I don't know what my wife wants! Anyways, enough about me, let's give a big round of applause for you: the fans. You guys have been here through it all. Through the wins and the losses. The season may be over, but I think we've learned that out of the bad stuff from the Almaris, we can extract a single good thread of pure fun: beating each other up over a ball that we can arbitrarily throw into a bucket. Now, if that isn't pure friendship, I don't know what is! But without further adieu, the final game of the first season of the Almaris Bucketball Association... or is it? (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Fakhr Dunes - San Luciano Saints The day started with a bit of an irregularity. A pink-haired guard came to the ABA official in San Luciano and informed them that the stadium was undergoing significant repairs from a recent riot following the other week's loss. Having no other option but to dismiss these valid circumstances, the ABA moved the final game outside of San Luciano, somewhere atop the cliffs between the Oasis and Savoy's capital. With that small administrative note out of the way, the stage was set. The stands teemed with vivid excitement. Hakim and Herakles shook hands at the initial tip-off of the last ABA game for this season. And with a gush of wind behind the ball, pushing it skyward, the two leaped. For the next thirty minutes, the two teams dripped with sweat. Azzam stuck to Herakles like a fly on spoiled food, but Amadea Barclay kept Qamar Al-Nabeel in continuous suppression throughout the field's obstacles. By half-time, the score was tied at forty-five. Head Coach Joseph Brandt of the Saints took his players into the locker room, which doubled as the arena's outhouse, and gave them a rousing speech on the importance of winning. He reminded them that they would kill some tribesmen off the court as payback for such a defeat even if they lost. Meanwhile, in the Dune's locker room, Murad Al-Hamad praised his player's undying courage and let them know that win or lose, they were still the Eastern Conference champions! The heat was back on with the post-half-time tip-off going to Istvan and Zaina. Herakles managed to get away from Azzam multiple times, but Zaina made herself known, pulling the Dunes ahead by two for most of the final half. However, with a slip-up by Qamar Al-Nabeel and a quick reaction from Obasi, the score was evened up. With seconds remaining in the game, the ball was in the hands of Hakim 'Brickwall' Al-Hattan. With a concise leap right inside the arch line, the ball flew upwards and towards the bucket. The score was 81 to 81. As the ball approached the bucket, it slowly sank in, and the monks blew the game's whistles. Hakim looked to his coach with a bright smile, but abruptly the earth sundered between them, and walls of stone and searing flame surrounded both teams on the court... IT ISN'T OVER... YET! A litany of repulsive and hideous liches and spooks emerged from the broken ground, their drab garb clinging to what skin they had left. Among them stood a pink-haired woman laughing maniacally. The ball slowly rolled to their feet, and the tallest of the liches, who wore a crown of tarnished gold, picked up the sphere and held it in one hand. "You did not impress us this season. Now let's see if you can really ball!" The unconscious monks laid silent on the floor, and the coaches and fans could be heard gasping and shouting from the other side of the fiery impediments. The pink-haired girl walked to the tip-off line as both teams stood in shock and awe. She turned to them and hissed, "Well, come on then, lads, get to your positions! We may be undying, but that doesn't mean I have all day." Hakim and Herakles looked to one another before nodding, knowing what needed to be done. A battle for bucketball itself commenced....... TUNE IN NEXT WEEK TO FIND OUT IF BUCKETBALL CAN BE SAVED?! Also, check out our discord below! You'll need it to prepare yourself for season two! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Finals - Week 4 Season 1 GOING TO A FIFTH GAME! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week was one of the most unique games, as the Saints and the Dunes matched off in the pitch-black and freezing cold desert near the Fakhr Oasis. Despite the conditions that are not necessarily known to the Saints, the glorious gameplay not only astonished this commentator but the entirety of the crowd! With this win the Saints have tied up the series, with two wins for both. Next week, in San Luciano, will decide it all! Will the Saints claim the title or will the Dunes steal it away in the Home that Herakles built? Everyone is on the edge of their seat to see who will claim the championship, but everyone is also wondering how?! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Fakhr Dunes - San Luciano Saints Back with a rush, the Saints pulled out a win over the Dunes in the desert this week. In a game that was delayed to start, the noontime pushed deep into the cold nights. Both teams were fully clad in thick face cloths to prevent the freezing temperatures from quickly impairing them. Savoyards, including Istvan and Herakles, wore thick head scarfs, and fourteen fans were found frozen to death after the hour-long exposure to the elements. However, the game was anything but cold. This epically chilled air was filled with corner shots from Herakles and the impressive defensive blocks near the bucket by Obasi. Meanwhile, the cold did not fare well for Azzam Bin Hakim, who was seen slumped over on the sidelines after halftime. If it weren't for Hakim's defensive protection and coverage for Azzam, there would've been a more significant deficit for the Dunes. The game ended cinematically as Herakles went to the corner and faded away from his corner guard to sink a five-pointer perfectly. As the crowd went wild, and most ran to find warmth, the game ended with a dreaded silence as both teams now prepared for the final showdown next week. Also, it appears that the cannons that were planned last week did not fire this week. Was it the cold? Was it the victory? Was it a plan for game five?! Find out next time! Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

Louis d’Azor quickly gets back up on the ladder and starts to remove the banner in Providence that read “MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!” He frowns at the Acting Archchancellors mistake before saying to a fellow citizen who passes, “Those who are swift to words are late to logic.”

Peter d'Arkent looked to his tutors with surprise at the missive, wondering what to say. He simply repeated what he has said all along, "any man who believes we should conspire for war on our own kind is dangerous." His tutors nodded and then swiftly returned to lecturing him on the importance of domestic economic development and foreign imports. The young duke just wished he could be a boy again.

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Finals - Week 3 Season 1 THE ROLLING DUNES STRIKE BACK! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week the Dunes managed to roll over the Saints with an eleven point difference, causing the Saints to begin to pull out all of the stops to prevent a loss of the championship. Most impressively, from this commentator's perspective, is the fact that the Dunes have managed to shut down the imposing offensive capabilities the Saints have had all year long. Regardless of how this shakes out in the end, I don't think we could've asked for a better matchup in the finals. Both teams have been through a lot this season and both teams will be better for it next season. Now, on to the game: (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Fakhr Dunes - San Luciano Saints With the lowest score yet, the Saints dropped the bucketball this week at the oasis against the Dunes. Most of this disappointment comes from the stellar defense of the Dunes, putting a lot of pressure on Herakles Mareno in the corners and Istvan inside the arch. Azzam Bin Hakim has battled back against the wound he sustained in week one to lead not only a defensive overthrow of one of the best offensive teams in the ABA but also his team with the spirit of a roaring lion! Meanwhile, the Saints are considering all options moving into next week, since a loss there would lose them the championship. Even Cheer Captain Selvia de Orsella has brought out all the stops in an effort to not lose any more games. She has packed massive cannons full of little pieces of paper and candy, what the Illations call confetti, and plans to use it somehow next game. Let's see if their tactic works, but either way I get a ton of free candy, so its a win for me! Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Finals - Week 2 Season 1 TIED UP, ONE ALL! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. Has it been three hell of a weeks here at the ABA! After the first game of the finals was ended it took very little time for a delay to become rapidly apparent and necessary. ABA Commissioners immediately suspended all games due to a fear of political repercussions. Additionally, the headquarters of the ABA in Providence was looted by a variety of miscreants and it has taken them time to recover. Regardless of all that though, that is behind us. The ball keeps being tossed and the ABA continues to march on. This week the Dunes managed to tie up the finals against the Saints in San Luciano, in what could be described as a comeback victory. Next week will put one of these teams away from clinching the championship, so it is the game to watch. Will the desert be too hot for the Savoyards to handle or will they pass the prickly Dunes and show them that they'll need a miracle to win? (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) San Luciano Saints - Fakhr Dunes The Saints have been marching all over the place this week, with all these politics, but they ended up on the court this week in San Luciano. They stared down the Dunes, who were not predicted to do this well this season by all expert opinions. Nonetheless, they were here and ready to ball. From the first tip off between one of the many Marenos and Zaina Al-Hamad it was on. Miraculously, with two weeks to recover, Azzam bin Hakim was back out on the court this week after being viciously, and illegally, speared by Andronikos Mareno. He seemed hell bent on defending Herakles in the corners, but more importantly taking a whooping to him. Herakles, not a player known for his fighting skills, resorted to fading away on many shots and changing his throw style. This ultimately led to a lower shot accuracy, as Herakles went four in thirteen attempts, only scoring a total of twenty two points the entire game. When the final whistle blew, and the Dunes took home the win, the Saints seemed even more determined to deny them the overall victory. Saint's Head Coach, Joseph Brandt, made it clear that losing a battle doesn't mean you lose the war. He also commented on how he did not like being referred to as a mole by the rowdy Flames fans in the crowd. While some report that Father Paco de Mantequilla was among these vile screamers, he has denied all involvement, saying he was out getting drinks with the boys and would never use such basic foul language to curse the Saints. Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Finals - Week 1 Season 1 THE FIRST GAME OF THE FIRST ABA CHAMPIONSHIP! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week in a historic first, the Fakhr Dunes played the San Luciano Saints in Savoy. This is the first game in the first ever Almaris Bucketball Association Championship (ABAC)! Fans from all across the continent have swarmed south for this once in a life-time event! We have received words from inns all the southern hub, in the oasis, and scattered across the Savoyard territories that there is no more room for all these spectacularly crazed bucketball fans. Memorabilia is hardly able to be kept on the shelf, as signed gauntlets from stars like Hakim the Brick Wall and Herakles the Hella Threes have been seen bidding for over two thousand minas! Everyone seems to have that one team they hate if their team is already out of the playoffs, as many dwarves fans were seen split between who to hate more. We hope you have a favorite team to hate if you're team is out! It makes it much better to watch and laugh as they trip at the final hurdle! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) San Luciano Saints - Fakhr Dunes On to the game, the Dunes came out moderately strong. For a majority of the first half the Qalasheen of the south managed to stay ahead by at least five points. Being led by Azzam Bin Hakim, their defense of Herakles was impeccable and utterly shut down the corner game. However, as we saw against the Berserkers, the Saints' sub culture kicked in and the previously suspended player, Andronikos Mareno, rushed up to Azzam during an inter-play break. Thrusting a spear at his side, blood was spilled across the bucketball court. There is no report on the status of Azzam at this time, but ABA officials have reviewed the evidence presented by the monk referees and issued a life-ban of Andronikos from the sport. Head Coach Murad Al-Hamad seemed deeply troubled by this turn of events, and his players followed suit. Moving into the second half, and with the removal of Azzam's height restriction on Herakles, the corner star went to score eight of his thirteen shots from the corners. Not the best accuracy but that's a total of forty points from the guy alone! By the time the final whistle blew the first game of the ABA championship was a literal blood bath. Some teeth were lost, some fans too, but most importantly we saw ruthless aggression to win possibly damage a player's career. We can only hope Azzam will be back to block Herakles, or the Dunes will have to come up with another strategy to over come the Saints' apparently crack corner. Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

Henry Penton yawns as he examines the document. He spoke to an aide near him, “we won’t have to spend nearly as much on this conflict as the Nordling War. The walls will only need to be three feet tall and it’ll make it impossible for the half-men to see over!” Then the old man cackled at his own joke, bumbling into a rumbling cough not soon after.

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Semifinals - Week 5 Season 1 THE FINALS ARE NEXT WEEK! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week the Flames, sadly, lost in a fifth game to the Dunes. Despite calls of magical light and dehydration, the ABA officials have been unable to confirm these claims and have hence given the win to the Dunes. Flamers, as they have been affectionally nicknamed across the ABA, were none too pleased with the results but it is a fact that there always must be a winner and a loser to every game. I can only hope they keep their energy alive till next season, where they will seek to destroy whoever bested them this season! On top of that, in the first meeting of the two championship teams, in the abandoned ruins of Rozania, the Dunes and Saints were asked to call a coin in the air. Dune's Coach Murad Al-Hamad called heads but the coin landed on tails, giving the home field advantage in the championship to the Saints. Regardless of how these games go, this first ABA final is sure to set records and make history! We wish both teams the best! For all those teams that are out, training has already begun in Kal'Darakaan and for the Druids. Let's see some more dedication out of some other teams, huh? Gotta put in the work, and the hours, to take what's yours! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Fakhr Dunes - Du Loc Flames Down in the desert the Flames geared up to face off in a striking game five against the Dunes. One of these teams were playoff bound, the other would be sent home packing. To start off the first half we saw plenty of interceptions by Gulmon in the arch against Dunes' supposed dribbling master, Zaina Al-Hamad. However, Gulmon was severely hampered by Hakim and Mehreen Al-Hattan both double covering him or Gib. This dynamic duo has been the centerpiece of the Du Locian offensive and defensive engine all season, and when targeted it usually leads to a favorable outcome for the team pressuring those two. However, the Flames were redeemed before the half by Father Harold, who brought the Flames within striking distance at forty two points to the Dunes' forty seven. After the half, the Flames did not play as well as the first. Spectators noted the intensity of the sun, but Flames fans have claimed it was a magical light which blinded and wore out their players. By the time the final whistle was called every single Flamer, even Head Coach Pace de Mantequilla, was utterly drenched in their own sweat. Hard-fought, but a loss nonetheless for the Flames. For the Dunes, this was another upset victory that puts them in a spot to claim the title of ABA champion! Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

Henry nodded over the missive before passing it to one of his aides, "Look at that, did you read it boy?! Wars are a destructive force and will drive consumption to shrink. To take actual prosperity and turn it into the fuel for war is not only foolhardy but distasteful, HARUMPH!" The old man coughed some more before snapping for another aide to bring him a cup of tea.

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Semifinals - Week 4 Season 1 OH THE SAINTS & GAME FIVE IN THE DESERT?! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week the Saints managed to clinch a spot in the finals with a victory over the Crows. More importantly though, they have now been declared the Western Conference champions. Parties have been scheduled for the entirety of next week in San Luciano to celebrate a spectacular victory for the team. Meanwhile, in Karosgrad, the Crows gave it their best shot but sadly were unable to overcome to dynamic, ever-changing, and often long-ranged threat of the Saints. Woe be those who come up against this team in the finals... They will need luck and some good strategy. Meanwhile, the East is still indecisive with choosing a candidate to send to the finals. The Dunes lost to the Flames this week, by two points, which cause not only the Flames' fans to conduct celebratory riots and "short man burnings," but hopefully pushes them into next week with the UMPH they need! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) San Luciano Saints - Karosgrad Crows Despite valiant efforts, this week the Crows' playoff bid ended with a ten point loss to the San Luciano Saints. This week, expecting the subbing culture to continue, the Crows put Reinhardt to work smashing against the substitutes. Little did they know, the Saints expected the move and quickly repositioned their offensive scheme overnight. Returning to the corner shooting of Herakles Mareno, the Saints scored big. With an accuracy of seven out of eight in the corners, Herakles circumvented the defenses of the Klaus Barclay. As those thirty five points put a large dent in the Crows' chances the deal was certainly sealed by Grigory Grubb, who has been relatively average this semifinal. His desparate attempts to cross up Amadea Barclay failed, and as a result the Crows spent the last minute of the game desperately trying to battle the odds that were staked against them. Regardless, both teams played exceptionally well this season. For the Crows, they will have to come back next year and target the Saints more. For the Saints, well, all I can say is Head Coach Joseph Brandt was seen having wine poured over him on the sidelines before he helped Herakles lift the Western Conference trophy, a towering golden object, bedecked in gems for each of the team's in the conference. This prize will get to stay with the Saints for a whole off-season now! It will make everyone jealous, no doubt!!! Du Loc Flames - Fakhr Dunes The Flames are determined to not lose their shot at the finals, as they pulled out a very slim margin over the Dunes in Du Loc. To begin, Gib and Gulmon did relatively acceptable this week. The only thing of note that seriously detracted from the Dunes' performance was several missed shots by Mehreen Al-Hattan, putting their team in a difficult position to recover after each. In fact, Gib usually waited for the rebound and turn around score anytime they had the ball, and it paid off! The Flames' fans were veracious this week, almost frothing at the mouth. This came to a head when the Flames, with only mere seconds left in the game and the Flames being down by one, had Gill'riik win a tip off and pass it directly to Isaac Jebediah. Isaac not only beautifully scored from the field but sealed the deal with a final three point goal! Meanwhile, dwarven fans were banned from entering the city for the whole week in fear of a repeat of the game two, where the Flames' stars were abducted. Since there were no dwarves, there was no loss for the Flames, said Coach-Father Paco de Mantequilla. However, next week the duo are heading back to the desert to see if the Dunes will be able to seal the deal, or if the Flames will have a come back victory riding into the final. Maybe some dwarves will get in and lock this thing down for the Dunes? Sneaky, sneaky dwarves! Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Semifinals - Week 3 Season 1 STAYING ALIVE! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week we saw both of the team which were up for elimination, the Flames and the Crows, pull back a win to stay in the semifinals and avoid a three game sweep. In San Luciano we saw the Crows offering their first counter to the 'subbing culture' of the Saints. Meanwhile, the Flames came up with an inventive strategy to catch the kidnappers of last week and avoid the same strategy this time around. In fact, when caught they found out the culprit was some rambling dwarf who said some 'pink haired lady' hired him, when everyone really knows it was the Miners! Flames fans are in an outrage, but they are also elated to see their team retain a shot at the finals. Now only two more win Flames! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) San Luciano Saints - Karosgrad Crows The Crows came back from a two game deficit this week to win by seventeen points over the Saints in San Luciano. Most of this should be credited to Ser Reinhardt Barclay taking a new approach to the Saints' subbing culture. Whenever the Saints subbed a player in it was Reinhardt's job to cover them or viciously beat the ball out of their hands. The brutality and sheer tenaciousness, absolutely love to see it! Herakles was very hesitant to take the ball when he was able, only scoring fourteen points for the night. It is most likely due to his double coverage by Klaus Barclay and Carlos Mendez. The Saints most notably subbed in Ernst Barclay, who Reinhardt took to punching in the gut or face for the twenty nine minutes he was on the court. In the end, the win was hard fought and the Saints will need to find a way to counter the giant northerner or could be looking at a comeback victory for the Cawing Crows of Karosgrad! Du Loc Flames - Fakhr Dunes This week the climate was different than the last two weeks as the Dunes had to travel north to Nu Loc Arena to face the Flames. Then again, thinking about it, everything is north for the Fakhr. So I guess they just went the only direction they really could! On the game though, the Flames managed to win a close game and retain a chance at the finals. In fact, the Flames came prepared this week after last week's mid-game kidnappings. Not only did they catch the perpetrator with guards, but they have cleared the Dunes of all responsibility. The culprit was none other than a dwarf! Despite the dwarf claiming to have no affiliation to the Miners and claiming some 'pink haired woman' paid him get caught, the Flames' fans quickly found the holding cell where he was being detained and beheaded him center court. The fury from knowing they arch-nemesis in the Miners had tried to steal their chance at the finals put enough in the souls of Father Harold and Gill'riik to score twenty five and twenty eight points, respectively. Meanwhile, the Dunes were quite caught up by all the beheading and seemed out of their element. Murad Al-Hamad was so confused by the running chaos of the crowd's rage and the field's confusing array of traps that his calls were not as on point as usual. Regardless, we will most likely see a clean game next week between the two, which the Flames will have to win to keep their final chances alive. Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Semifinals - Week 2 Season 1 THE SEMIFINALS ARE HERE! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week saw the same returns as last week, where the Saints bested the Crows in a close game and the Dunes also beat the Flames. However, there were some highlights. The Saints had a bench player, Frederick Gloop, sacrifice himself for the winning play of the game. Like the assault of the Berserker's star, this strategy of sending in unknown bench players seems to be working for them. In the desert though there were some interesting developments. Two of the Flames' starting players were taken from the sidelines just when they were about to come back! This shocking turn of events has sent the ABA commission into a frenzy, trying to secure the safety of future events. Likewise, the Dunes have promised to hunt down those involved but the Flames appear to believe it was a job orchestrated by the southern menaces themselves. (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Karosgrad Crows - San Luciano Saints This verse turned out the same as the first as the Crows now desperately cling to life in their playoff bid, the Saints looking to ****** their shot at the finals away. Herakles Mareno and Amadea Barclay were both on their form tonight, but both heavily countered by the coverage of Klaus Barclay and Grigory Grubb. Surprisingly, a bench player was pulled out by the Saints. The player known as Frederick Gloop not only came from an unknown bench position to playing the arch forward as a replacement of Istvan, but he clutched the win with a last second dunk over the short Grigory Grubb, despite the halflings smashing of his gauntlets on the forward's calves. Gloop was seen being carried off the field, unable to walk, but winning the game for his team in a close race. Next week in San Luciano we will see if the Saints can clutch another sweep and move on to the first ABA finals. If the Crows managed to win it will be because of an excellent strategy, or just good ol' fashioned sabotage! Fakhr Dunes - Du Loc Flames This week in the oasis was a bid out of the ordinary, but the result was not. To begin, the Dunes played a solid field game, shockingly led by the towering Azzam Bin Hakim, who scored an impressive twenty nine points in total on the night. Meanwhile, Gib and Gulmon both strived to succeed inside the arch and in the field play, both combined scoring thirty nine points. However, the oddities began when Father Harold mysteriously disappeared during the half time break. Similarly, Isaac Jebediah did not return from a bathroom break mid-way through the second. This, almost coincidentally, coincided with the come back pushes from the Flames. The two did return after the game, both unsure where they had went and with a severe lack of memory of the game. Without Jebediah and the Flying Father the offensive capabilities of the team were limited. This results in a loss for the Flames but the Dunes have not claimed responsibility for the disappearances. In fact, they have pledged to work with the Flames to find the culprits. Next week the Flames are hosting the Dunes and we will see if the home field advantage turns things around for them, and hopefully keeps them from being kidnapped again! Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Semifinals - Week 1 Season 1 THE SEMIFINALS ARE HERE! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week the first semifinals in ABA history commenced. In the East we had the Dunes claiming the victory over the Flames, showing off their training and dedication to the sport. The Flames were none too happy and are most likely to resort to trickery to score a win next week, pushing the games back to a home field advantage in Du Loc. Meanwhile in the West, the Saints cleanly pulled a win from the Crows and put themselves in an excellent position. Winning both of their home games, where they have home field advantage, would send them to the finals now. The Crows need to be wary of the shifting strategies of the Saints but at the same time prioritize plans they had at the beginning of the season that usually netted them some stellar wins. (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Karosgrad Crows - San Luciano Saints Perhaps the celebrations in Karosgrad made some of their players a little heavy on their feet this week, as the Crows lost by eighteen points to the Saints. As usual, the long game was not only crucial to the Saints' success but switched up several key factors. Instead of solely optimizing Herakles Mareno, the best corner in the ABA at the moment, they passed to Amadea Barclay who has been slowly training under Herakles. Scoring a total of twenty five points from the corners it is safe to say they have learned a thing or two! As for the Crows, Rhys Ruthern was seen celebrating last week but disappointed this week in his team's performance. Carlos Mendez was stopped several times in the arch by the imposing Istvan, leading to multiple quick opportunities for the Saints to score after a steal. Hopefully next week will fare better for the Crows, as the Saints have yet to lose a playoff game yet. Despite being the first seed, the Crows may have met their match in the Saints. Fakhr Dunes - Du Loc Flames In the single most anticipated match in ABA history, the Dunes invited the Flames to the desert. With the scorching sun beating down, the Dunes snatched away a close game with two last-minute field scores by Qamar Al-Nabeel. However, the game was close the entire way through. Gill'riik made staggering defensive plays throughout the night that made this game as close as it was. The only thing that really cost the Flames the win was the fact the Dunes had more accurate shooting from weeks of training. Head Coach Murad Al-Hamad of the Dunes made it clear that the reason for this win was his dedicated, game-focused, players. They are also looking forward to a clean series with no tomfoolery, but the likelihood of the Flames fulfilling that dream is scarce. Next week I expect another close game, maybe even a win for the Dunes, but when they venture into Du Loc there tables may be exceedingly flipped with the extensive work done to their court. Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Quarterfinals - Week 5 Season 1 THE LAST QUARTERFINAL! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. It was a slower week than most, seeing only one game, but what a game that was! The Crows faced off against the Krugs in Karosgrad and managed to pull out a close win. The first five-game playoff series in ABA history ended with the Crows marching on to face the Saints in a brutal affair. Meanwhile, the Flames and the Dunes have been gearing up for next week's brawl. Both teams are set on making it to the finals and seem to want to stop at nothing to get there. While the Dunes have clearly went for a more moderate and conservative training regimen, the Flames have opted to pursue more crafty and underhanded tactics that boost their overall exceptional team of fighters. On top of that, the ABA draft and off-season free agencies are opening up this week. We will see how both of those progress. (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Karosgrad Crows - Iron Uzg Krugs The only game of this week, the Krugs ventured north for a fateful game against the Crows. Despite the recent outrageous behavior of the orcish fans in the Iron Uzg, the Crows fans were more restrained and watched the game with relative calm. Perhaps they were enraptured by the glorious display of showmanship between the two teams. The Yarrow Climb returned this week and seemed to be relatively effective against Klaus Barclay, who struggled to pull the flexible Yarrow from the bucket's rim. However, Rhys Ruthern demonstrated tonight the exact reason why some in the ABA commentator booths call him the Rebound Ruthern. Shot after shot from afar for the Krugs missed tonight, and their only real success was inside the arch with Yarrow and Ulug. Yet, with each missed field shot the ball seemed destined for Rhys' hand and he put up a staggering thirty six points in the field and arch. With that edge, and the lack of the aggressive crowds back home, the Crows managed to scratch out a victory and claim the series and a spot in the semi-finals. The after game celebration was wild, with Head Coach Feodor May having a bucket of wine dumped over him. Meanwhile, the Krugs left without saying much and appeared disgruntled with the results. Next week the Crows will have to battle it out against the Saints to see who will get the chance to claim the title of Western Conference Champion and a shot at the grand championship! FREE AGENTS AND THE ABA DRAFT A lot has changed over the course of one season in the ABA, but as the inaugural season ramps up to its grand finale many other teams are looking to the off-season. In particular, the ABA draft and the free agents who will be floating around. To start off, the ABA draft will have teams select newcomers into the ABA in reverse-rank order. This means the Bucks will have the first pick, followed by the Rabbits, Pigeons, Druids, Purifiers, and so on. This should help boost their abilities moving into next season but it will all depend on their dedication to finding the right fit for their strategies. For the free agents, there are several enticing players left homeless after this season concludes. One notable player is Alexander Antler, who was released from the Talus Grove Druids. He has suffered from morale and attitude issues, but is still a capable offensive player for those who want to expand that capability. On the other hand, Isa Basrid is seeking to move from the Vigilants. One part of the Susa Boys, he is possibly the most sought after free agent at the moment, expecting many offers from across the ABA. Without a doubt there are more to be listed, and we will continue to bring you free agent news on the slower weeks of games. If you find out someone you know is a free agent or is looking to be drafted please let us know! Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Do you want to be drafted or made a free agent in the ABA? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Quarterfinals - Week 4 Season 1 A FIFTH GAME TOSS UP! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. Week four is upon us, and only two games were being played this week. The Krugs took on the Crows and needed a home win to stay alive while the Miners took on the Flames in Du Loc and tried to tie up the series. At the end of the week only one of these teams fulfilled their objective. The Flames beat the Miners by a wide margin and sent them off to face the Dunes in the semi-finals. Contrarily, the Krugs beat a win out of the Crows, literally, and managed to tie up the series. Now it will go to a fifth game, the only game of next week, to decide who plays against the Saints in the semi-finals. More importantly, we have some big news coming out of Vortice and Rozania this week as the two teams have decided to merge. Big congratulations to them and a bigger congratulations to the Miners for playing an excellent season this year. Let's hope those grudges they hold carry them, with a burning passion, to victory next season! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Iron Uzg Krugs - Karosgrad Crows In the most decisive defeats in the Western Conference quarterfinals, the Crows lost to the Krugs by a deficit of twenty six points. Not only were the Krugs compelled to win this game or be eliminated but they once again focused on hyping the ravenous home crowd of orcs. Many strolling food vendors were suddenly hoisted into the air and thrown onto the court after shots were made by the Crows, including one particularly limber halfling warm bun seller who was punted directly into Head Coach Feodor May, who was seen taking the last half of the game in the locker room with attentive medics. Meanwhile, Rakothurz was once again racking up points and played particularly well with the ten foot tall Mal’Acatch. With this defeat though, the Krugs now have to venture back north to Karosgrad to seek out their final, fifth game, victory and secure a spot in the semi-finals. On the flip side, the Crows have made it particularly clear that the orcish spectators have lost them these games, not their players. Their resilience will be tested next week when the verdict of fate is delivered and we find out if the fourth-seeded Krugs can displace the first-seeded Crows! Du Loc Flames - Kal'Darakaan Miners The Flames and Miners faced off this week but the match seemed to begin long before the sun even rose. In the darkness of night, Miner's fans or players appeared to have snuck onto the extensive court in Du Loc and attempted to dig tunnels underneath the court. And they almost got away with it, if it wasn't for Azdor, a bench sitter for the Flames who's keen dwarvish eye caught the remnants of digging activity near one of the corner lines. With quicker intervention before the game the tunnels, all thirteen of them, were blocked up and traps were laid inside the tunnels as well. When the game began, Grimdal Irongut was swiftly ensnared by a trip-wire activated trap and laid underground for the entirety of the first half of the game. Going into the half the game was at seventy five for the Flames and thirty two for the Miners. Although they desperately tried to come back, their offense was off-balance and ultimately led to their defeat. The only thing that saved this from being more of a blow out was the Miners' still impeccable defense, led by Agnar Ireheart. Regardless, this come back by the Flames sets them up against the dastardly Dunes for the semifinals and the Miners are now confined to watch the rest of the season from the sidelines. But I doubt those dwarves will forget this grudge, it's like they have a book or something where they write this stuff down?! OTHER ABA NEWS - TEAM MERGER In other news across the ABA, the Krakens and Rabbits have officially signed a contract saving the Krakens from relegation. Rabbit's Head Coach, Billy Bob Johnsilton, announced the deal this morning. The Krakens will retain their name, logo, arena, and all other staff while taking on a few of the homeless hobo players of the Rabbits. With that, next season is shaped up to see the Honeyhill Hedgehogs enter the Eastern Conference in place of the Rabbits and the Western Conference will retain the Krakens. As for the draft, the ABA Commissioners have deemed that the merger must entail the higher of the two team's standings. This means, the Krakens will not have the first pick in the ABA draft and must use the Rabbit's standings for all post-season activities. Head Coach Johannus of the Krakens was ecstatic about the change and promised the winners of the ABA finals an entire batch of Krakens cookies! Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Are you interested in bucketball and want to learn more? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Quarterfinals - Week 3 Season 1 TWO SWEEPS AND TWO SERIES ON THE ROPES?! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. Happy Harvest or St. Robert's Feast to all of our eager readers out there. I, for one, am stuffed to the brim with various sausages and biscuits. Can you believe my wife says drinking beer and watching bucketball makes me lazy?! I mean, for crying out loud, it's my job! Anyways, this week we saw two teams advance to the semi-finals. The Dunes managed to sweep away the Vigilants in a not-so close series but the Saints had to squeak out three wins from the Berserkers to barely claim a sweep. As for the teams eliminated, we will see you next season and this commentator feels the Berserkers will be back with wrath! Meanwhile, the Crows, Krugs, Miners, and Flames are all locked in mortal combat and will still play next week. If the Crows or the Flames win they will advance, but if not those series are heading for a final game five! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Iron Uzg Krugs - Karosgrad Crows The atmosphere around game three of the Crows and Krug's series was very different, as it headed to the Iron Uzg and shifted home court advantage to the Crows. Not only was the crowd feverishly radical in their support of the hometown team but they were essential to the defeat of the Crows. Rakothûrz’Ram was seen streaking across the court, literally, as they blew up an impressive twenty nine points. Not only did they optimize the field and arch rushes but they used their moves to fire up the crowd, including Yarrow who was seen standing on top of the bucket and dancing for a whole minute towards the half. Meanwhile, the Crows saw Klaus Barclay miss some vital shots tonight towards the end of the game. What sealed the deal though was the Krugs' fans literally throwing bags of flaming hot embers at the Crows, including the despised Grigory Grubb. These orc fans are serious about some violence, and another match will happen again in their home court next week. Let's hope the Crows don't learn to adapt, and if they don't this is heading for a fifth game in Karosgrad. Varhelm Berserkers - San Luciano Saints In a saddening end to Berserkermania, even home court advantage did not stop the power house of the south from keeping their ranged game in the corners strong as ever. Lindhardt, a valuable member of the team, was out again this week due to an injury sustained from Andronikos Mareno's bladed boots. Without him the team, struggling along with the likes of Vykk Volaren and Alric Edvardsson were not able to put up as well of a rounded defense. However, it did mark the first appearance of substitutes Lee Sun and Ellenore Eiriksson, as Head Coach Vane Freysson was desperately trying anything to make this game a win. As for the Saints, Herakles was once again vital in their attack but this game they shifted much of their carrying time to Obasi, who was surprisingly dominate inside the arch. They walked away with a total of thirty points even. What can be said about this game is that the Berserkers put up a valiant last stand and they will be back next year with vengeance in mind, especially for Lindhardt. Providence Vigilants - Fakhr Dunes This week the Vigilants were not able to pull a win, even in Providence. The Dunes, a team which has kept its morale high throughout wins and losses this season, has pushed through to banish the fourth-seeded Vigilants. Erik Othaman, despite being a bit of a boost mid-season, has fallen flat and failed to genuinely improve the team overall. His showing tonight was pitiful, with a measly five points and leaving with a twenty two percent shooting success rate. The Dunes saw Qamar Al-Nabeel take the lead tonight, as they showed off the speed of the sand vipers of their home. Quick in the arch and even quicker to pull up for a shot in the field, their twenty nine points were key to the Dunes advancing to the semi-finals. Now the only question that remains is who they will face: The Miners or the Flames? Du Loc Flames - Kal'Darakaan Miners What a close one, again these two teams are not looking to give away a win. The Flames, with home field advantage and off of a close win last week, managed to squeak out another close win this week. Rumor has held that in the new city construction, nicknamed Nu Loc, the bucketball court is not only rigged with extensive machinery but moving obstacles in the field. Those rumors were proven true this week as the Miners found out about the added trapdoors, faux player dummies, and moving bucket. Despite calling foul the referees did determine that the ABA does not specify that the bucket cannot move and it explicitly encourages the addition of obstacles in the field. Isaac Jebediah was well informed not only of the rules but of the layout and seemingly random movement of the field obstacles and managed to score the final, game winning bucket, from inside the arch with the entire Miners team standing on the other side of the flame-spewing arch line. Grimdal Irongut and Lulubelle Starbreaker both had significant trouble tonight but Agnar Ireheart from the corners managed to salvage what could've been a blowout. Next week, if the Flames pull these same tactics, they may very well steal away this quarterfinals from the favored dwarves. Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Are you interested in bucketball and want to learn more? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Quarterfinals - Week 2 Season 1 DONE IN THREE?! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week we have to stand amazed at some of the displays this week. The Crows, Saints, and Dunes have managed to pull within one game of ending their series early and sweeping their opponent. Meanwhile, the Flames and the Miners seem intent on brining their series to the fifth, as neither team seems keen on giving on inch to the other. If the Crows and the Saints advance we could be looking at a very dominate Western Conference bid in the finals. Meanwhile, there is little hope among fans that the Vigilants would be the best pick for the East. Between the Dunes, Miners, and Flames it really is a toss up to see who deserves it the most, but it doesn't come down to that. It comes down to who wins and who loses. (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Karosgrad Crows - Iron Uzg Krugs In Karosgrad this week the Krugs could not overcome the Crows and their home audience's enthusiasm with bucketball. Two new additions also joined the Crows' lineup this week and they keep varying up their players to produce some off-kilter defensive measures by the Krugs, who already suffer in that category. Andrik Barbanov and Sigmar Mondblume were both brought in, and with little record of their strategies put a combined thirty seven points on the board, specializing in the field and in arch rebounds. Meanwhile, the Krugs saw the Yarrow Climb continue to be countered. The ten foot tall Mal’Acatch did happen to pose a greater threat this game, severely hampering things for arch rushes. Grigory Grubb was unsuccessful on most of his plays towards the arch as a result. Next week will determine the Krug's fate against the top ranked team in the Western Conference, but perhaps this series isn't over after three. Perhaps the Krugs are holding out for a comeback win! San Luciano Saints - Varhelm Berserkers In a game that was closer than last week's, but still not a win, the Berserkers lost in San Luciano against the Saints. This loss puts the Berserkers on the verge of elimination, one game away from ending Berserkermania for this season. With the loss of Lindhardt last week to a reckless Mareno assault, many expected an even steeper point deficit in game two. Those people, were wrong. Vykk Volaren came out big this week, shooting forty from the corners and securing just under half of their team's overall points. It almost looked like Herakles and Vykk were trying to one up each other, performing various trick shots from afar. However, it came down to some last minute arch rushed by Ulrich von Alstreim, charging directly against Skjord Svardssen, that sealed the deal and put an end to the second week in San Luciano. With any luck, the change of pace and environment next week in Varhelm will allow the Berserkers to overcome the Saints and claim their first playoff win of the season. Is Berserkermania dead? We will find out next week! Fakhr Dunes - Providence Vigilants If it wasn't the water shortages this week it was a sloppy display this week as the Vigilants came crashing down in front of the Dunes. With ease the sturdy Azzam Bin Hakim was able to effectively limit the Susa Boys and bring about a switch end to their arch rushes, especially late game when he only let one in thirteen to the bucket. This absolute dissemination comes as no surprise to the keen observer who has seen the Vigilants decline all season, with an aging and overpaid team. In particular, the Dunes are a youthful team that clinched their spot first. The Vigilants, on the other hand, had to wait until the second to last week to even secure a spot. To then have to face the Dunes, on their home turf, does not spell good fortunes for Provy. However, maybe next week in their home city the Vigilants will take advantage of the familiar environment and show the Dunes up. Kal'Darakaan Miners - Du Loc Flames In the only game this week that told a different tale than last, the Flames squeaked out a win over the Miners. Coming back from magical manipulation this round, the Flames almost seemed like an entirely different team. Father Harold stood out this week as an essential shot caller that directed the Gib and Gulmon dynamic duo into position. From the field he seemed to weave a coherent offensive against the stout dwarven defense. Managing to break through many times, Agnar Ireheart and Grogg were limited in their response from the quick thinking and moving dark elves. This win puts the Flames as the only team to even up a series in the ABA playoffs so far. And if I had to bet, this series may very well be going to the fifth game. Neither team wants to give an inch, but eventually one will have to falter. Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Are you interested in bucketball and want to learn more? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Quarterfinals - Week 1 Season 1 THE FIRST LAST WEEK! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. The first thing we wanted to get to this week was an announcement from the Almaris Bucketball Amateur Division (ABAD). Congratulations to the Honeyhill Hedgehogs and their prideful Perry the Porcupine as they will be the team advancing to the ABA next season. Meanwhile, in the ABA this week the quarterfinals kicked off to a heated start. This really is some of the best bucketball we have seen in ages, truly the cream of the crop! However, these five games series are about endurance and quick wits. Countering your opponents is essential, but even more essential is kicking some... Sorry, forgot this is a kid's pamphlet. Uh, kicking their patooties or something like that! Anyways, forget about that and let's see how the best teams in the ABA ended up after smashing and crashing against each other this week! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Karosgrad Crows - Iron Uzg Krugs In the first ABA playoff game in history the Krugs took on the Crows in Karosgrad. It was a hard-fought game, maybe the most hard-fought game in the history of the league. At first it seemed like the Crows might run away with it, ending the first half with a fourteen point lead. It was only after the half that the Crows came back appearing weaker, disoriented, and lacking any luck to hit their buckets from the field. But in the end it came down to an overtime last minute shot by the Krug's corner, Ahng, which missed and flew out of bounds, ending their chance of victory this week. The Crows put up a spectacular defense and the Krugs did as well, both teams a bit more tense than their usual aggressively offensive play styles. Carlos Mendez was essentially shut down in the arch tonight as Rhys Ruthern and Ailred var Ruthern, a new addition to the Crows' lineup, had to pick up the slack left behind. This may prove to be one of the tightest playoff series ever! San Luciano Saints - Varhelm Berserkers The Saints clashed with the Berserkers in San Luciano this week, and I think if the Berserker's would have been home in Varhelm this week they may have snuck out a win. However, they weren't, and the team ended up with a loss. Of particular note, Lindhardt "Bucket King" Faretto, was injured very early on into the second half by Andronikos Mareno, a substitute from the bench who was immediately ejected following the blow for wearing boots with blades in the toe. He has been given a suspension until the finals, if the Saints make it that far. The injury to Lindhardt has yet to be disclosed but his claves did not look well for the ware as he hobbled off the court, supported by his teammates. Berserker fans were quickly ushered out into the countryside following the game due to their tendency to loot and raid, and this week was no different. Moving forward the Berserkers will have to see about shutting down Herakles' long game and maybe playing a bit dirtier than usual. Fakhr Dunes - Providence Vigilants The Dunes took on the Vigilants in the desert this week and the Vigilants were entirely out of their element. Quite literally, their water boy had forgotten to bring water with them. The Susa Boys and Erik Othaman seemed mightily out of energy, especially the later who is now over a hundred years old! Meanwhile, the prepared Dunes did not spare any of their liquids until after the game, granting each player a pitcher of water as a prize for their loss. The magnanimous Dunes were led by Zaina Al-Hamad, who played aggressively inside the arch this week. Hakim did not even seem to break a sweat in the field or the arch this week, passively pushing aside the Vigilant's players who were worn out after the half. This series may end up being the most lop-sided of the engagements in the quarterfinals. Kal'Darakaan Miners - Du Loc Flames The Miners had the Flames in Kal'Darakaan this week and the Flames were suspiciously incompetent, even for a team that has never beaten the Miners in the regular season. Although many of the Flames' fans were quick to call foul play by the Miners, inspection by the referees determined that the Miners were not the ones casting magic on the Flames and called an end to the game early to prevent further interference. Regardless of the little under a half of the game that remained, the Flames were down by a sizable margin and had to take the loss. Father Mantequilla was seen vigorously trying to get after the Grand King after the game, verbally accusing him of encouraging the magical abuse of the bucket and his players via some pink haired lady in the crowd. The Grand King has denied these claims and no one but the Head Coach of the Flames saw the supposed witch. We can only hope next week will be less controversial for this series! Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Are you interested in bucketball and want to learn more? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Week 22 Season 1 THE FIRST LAST WEEK! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. We finally made it! Its the final week of the inaugural season of the ABA. Although many have protested, died, gotten injured, or cried along the way we are still standing! Despite knowing last week who would be in the playoffs, we now know how the final standings look for our statisticians out there. In the Western Conference the Crows, Krugs, Saints, and Berserkers are seeking the title while the East has offered the Dunes, Vigilants, Miners, and Flames. Each of the next weeks will be filled with five game series, with the first team to three wins sweeping the series and advancing to the next stage. Below we have included a nice chart of the starting playoff positions, whereby the first seed will take on the fourth and the second will take on the third. Regardless of how it works, the games will certainly be some of the most exciting in our short ABA history! Buckle up kiddos, this one is gonna be a wild ride! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) San Luciano Saints - Iron Uzg Krugs The Saints and the Krugs, both playoff bound teams, faced each other this week. Unless the Krugs had managed to squeak out a high point surplus this game, the largest in ABA history was needed, they were set as the fourth seed, and the unlucky team to face off against the Crows. As fate would have it, the Saints kept their long game alive this week, with Herakles successfully moving about in the corners. Meanwhile, Yarrow was constantly being swatted by Istvan near or under the bucket to help relieve the pressure for his teammates. Now comes the question if the Berserkers will have the same trouble against the Saints in the playoffs? Vortice Krakens - Yong Ping Dragons The Krakens hosted the Dragons this week and both teams were certain that they missed the playoffs. Lanqui, in particular, seemed to be aware of this fate. In interviews after this week's game it appears he feels uniquely responsible for the loss last week that ended the Dragon's chances at the playoffs. Despite this, both teams enjoyed the Kraken's signatures cookies after the game and tea was shared amicably. This time, the referees informed everyone the tea was untampered with and there were no emergency bathroom breaks seen at the after party. The Krakens have truly become the kindest team in the whole ABA, for what that is worth! Elysium Foxes - Elvenesse Bucks The Foxes had a lot in store for the Bucks this week, as neither team will be advancing. As their final game, the Foxes unleashed a flurry of successful arch rushes that even the High Prince had very little defense against. Meanwhile, we saw Elsiimah'Ceru score several successful field shots, racking up a total of twenty four points on the night. As for the off season perspectives, the Foxes are going to focus on developing the great team they already have while the Bucks are certainly bound to acquire some necessary talent in the draft. Karosgrad Crows - Varhelm Berserkers Two more playoff bound teams faced off this week as the Berserkers challenged the Crows in Karosgrad. The Crows demonstrated their dominating force as Carlos Mendez scored a record forty two points in the arch this week. Really focusing on tying down the Berserker's offensive pushes with distractions or outright full team coverage on the ball carrier seemed to be partially successful, but it only took Skjord Svardssen a few attempts to break through and score before the strategy seemed abandoned and regular play resumed. As for the playoffs, these teams will both have worthy challengers and its really a tossup who takes the win. Providence Vigilants - Rozania Rabbits The Vigilants hosted the Rabbits this week, only one week after clinching the final playoff spot in the East. The Rabbits managed to, despite their deficiencies, score several times in quick succession at the beginning and end of the game. Erik Othaman seemed genuinely turned about by the quick paced Rabbits, something we haven't seen before. Meanwhile, the Susa Boys were able to keep pace but were seen excessively sweating and needing a multitude of water breaks. For the playoffs the Vigilants are squared off against the top-seeded team, the Dunes. We can only hope the Vigilants put something together before next week or they may very well end up wiped from the playoffs in a three game sweep. Kal'Darakaan Miners - Talus Grove Druids The Miners took this week to experiment with a varying amount of contraptions they had built to boost their player's abilities. Many, for the most part, did not work and the Druids rather got around them or fully removed them from the players by holding them down and ripping, for example, their ear wax out of their ears. This easy week turned into a rough one as they lost to the Druids, but nonetheless have a spot in the playoffs secured. As for the Druids, we expect them to move this off season as none of the members of the current roster are even druids or from the grove, instead mostly being Orenians. Du Loc Flames - Fakhr Dunes The Flames and the Dunes, two dominate team in the East, faced off this week in the newly constructed Du Loc arena. Gib and Gulmon were uncharacteristically quiet this week on the field and the Dunes took advantage of it by having Hakim and Mehreen rush and corner respectively. The game was close for the most part, as both teams kept pace with one another, but ultimately this ended in a loss for the Flames just due to time and points. Both teams may even have the rematch in the semi-finals for the Eastern Conference if they can manage to beat out their challengers. In which case, the Flame's fans certainly hope for a different outcome. Freeport Pigeons - Haelun'or Purifiers The Pigeons took on the Purifiers this week but the Purifiers simply looked unenthused again. After giving the Vigilants a run for their mina, the Purifiers seem to have fallen back into disinterest in the ABA. The Pigeons, on the other hand, have only won this game because of the lack of defense on the Purifiers side, not their overwhelming offensive capabilities. In fact, on multiple occasions the Pigeons missed the ball several times and just stood around the bucket screaming "mine, mine, mine!" as the high elves looked on, sharpening their nails with files. When they did play, the Purifiers scored points so easily it looked like they were playing against a flock of birds... which they were! STANDINGS The Western Conference Pos. Team Points Played Won Lost "+-" 1 Karosgrad Crows 36 22 18 4 180 2 San Luciano Saints 34 22 17 5 145 3 Varhelm Beserkers 28 22 14 8 183 4 Iron Uzg Krugs 26 22 13 9 114 5 Elysium Foxes 24 22 12 10 71 6 Yong Ping Dragons 22 22 11 11 -17 7 Elvenesse Bucks 10 22 5 17 -141 8 Vortice Krakens 8 22 4 18 -299 The Eastern Conference Pos. Team Points Played Won Lost "+-" 1 Fakhr Dunes 32 22 16 6 164 2 Kal'Darakaan Miners 26 22 13 9 97 3 Du Loc Flames 26 22 13 9 93 4 Providence Vigilants 24 22 12 10 21 5 Haelun'or Purifiers 16 22 8 14 -60 6 Talus Grove Druids 14 22 7 15 -134 7 Freeport Pigeons 14 22 7 15 -148 8 Rozania Rabbits 12 22 6 16 -269 AMATEUR DIVISION RESULTS AND STANDINGS Halcourt Eagles - Fennic Blizzards 83 - 81 Honeyhill Hedgehogs - Valwyck Bears 93 - 98 The Amateur Division Pos. Team Points Played Won Lost "+-" 1 Honeyhill Hedgehogs 38 22 19 2 152 2 Valwyck Bears 30 22 15 7 83 3 Fennic Blizzards 16 22 8 13 16 4 Halcourt Eagles 4 22 2 20 -257 Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Are you interested in bucketball and want to learn more? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT

THE ALMARIS BUCKETBALL ASSOCIATION GAME RESULTS Week 21 Season 1 FULLY CLINCHED! (THIS WEEK'S ANTHEM) Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for picking up another edition of Almaris Bucketball. I am, as always, your dutiful commentator and author Martie Lickman. This week is the second to last week of the inaugural season of the ABA. We have seen a lot of highs this season and a lot of lows, but now we have a fully clinched playoff roster. Congratulations to all teams who played this season and good luck to all those who are advancing to the playoffs. For the teams who didn't make it, especially those who were so close, we want you to know that there is always next season. Some of you finished with winning record, which is an admirable feat all unto itself. But never forget to keep pushing during the off-season and preparing for season two, which will be here before you know it! Next week is the last week anyways, so get your final shots in if you can! (ABA OPENING POST LINKED HERE) Du Loc Flames - Haelun'or Purifiers This week the Flames hoped to put to bed the playoff dreams of the high elven Purifiers and they did. In a close game led, surprisingly, by Gill'riik with twenty nine points the Flames beat out the unenthusiastic Purifiers and sealed their fate to miss the playoffs, boosting the Vigilants in. The Flames have been clinched with their position for several weeks now but could've thrown this game to cause Providence more grief but chose not to, probably because they don't like to lose very much. Now that they know who their opponent will be it is only one week between them and the playoffs starting. Kal'Darakaan Miners - Fakhr Dunes The Miners took on the Dunes this week in the halls of Kal'Darakaan. Neither team wanted to relent and both teams pursued hyper-defensive strategies that focused on double or triple man coverage on the ball carriers. In some instance where Grimdal Irongut had the ball and began arch rushing he found the entire Dunes team tackling or attempting to strip the ball away. Despite the best efforts of the fans to cause distractions the Dunes had also brought branded earmuffs. However, they did not have a counter for the jump boots which allowed the Miners to come eerily close at the end of the game, literally jumping over the walls of opposing players. Both these teams are heading to the playoffs so are we getting a preview of the matchup at the championships here this week? Providence Vigilants - Talus Grove Druids The Vigilants managed to win this week against the Druids, putting the Purifier's dream of a playoff spot to sleep. The Druids fielded both Amie Halcourt-Ruthern and James Madron in what is increasingly looking like an Orenian lineup. Could we be seeing a rebranding or move for the Druids? As for the Vigilants, their standard lineup managed to suffice for this week. Old man Erik Othaman struggled to keep pace with the Susa Boys who were the primary reason for the high score this game. The Vigilants don't have much to celebrate in the playoffs as they are now bound to face off against the top-seed, rather that be the Dunes or the Miners depending on next week's score. They can only hope there is a change in pace for that team or for theirs, or a quick exit from the playoffs might be in store. Karosgrad Crows - Rozania Rabbits The Rabbits headed up the Karosgrad to face the Crows and left in an odd situation. For the second time this season the Rabbits did not finish a game, instead leaving after the first half to beg for food from the amassed game-goers. One Rabbits player, named Hobo Hoboson was seen drinking muddy water from a hole in the street and claiming it was the best 'soup' they had had in weeks. Since the Rabbits never returned the monks lets the Crows take the victory and the Rabbits forfeited the first game in ABA history. Despite this, before they were drawn away, the Rabbits managed to earn a sizable number of points. Was it the smell of food or the possibility of merging with the Krakens that made them ambitious? That is up for you to decide. Elysium Foxes - Varhelm Berserkers The Foxes hosted the Berserkers this week and both team's playoff chances hung in the balance. Astasul'Ceru tried desperately to get past the Berserker's formidable defense but was stopped time and time again by the likes of Vykk Volaren. The ultimate shutdown of Eugeo de Astra did not help them score points, as he was double teams for most of the game in the corners. With this win the Foxes have officially missed the playoffs and the Berserkers have officially clinched theirs. The Foxes put up an excellent challenge this season but managed to be beat out by some of the most competitive teams in the most competitive conference. We wish them tons of luck next season! Vortice Krakens - Elvenesse Bucks The Krakens took on the Bucks this week in Vortice and the result was surprising. Neither one of these teams have had that successful of a season but the Krakens, led by Paris Langren managed score several successful corner shots towards the end of the game that really gave them the advantage. The High Prince was less than amused by this performance, especially losing to the Krakens. He did not stay for any after-game interviews but the Krakens certainly celebrated their win this week. Despite being the last place team in the ABA they have a chance next year to show the league was wrong about them and their delicious cookies! San Luciano Saints - Yong Ping Dragons The Dragons came into this game against the Saints in San Luciano with a hope that they could keep their playoff dreams alive. A win here tonight would've kept them in the running, but alas that was not the case. Lanqui was seen desperately struggling with Amadea Barclay in the field during the last seconds of the game before shooting an ill-fated last minute shot. It missed the bucket and as a result the game ended with a close loss for the Dragons. Lanqui was spotted later this very week crying in a tavern over an alcoholic beverage. This loss is quite truly the saddest fate, having a shot at the playoffs ripped away at the last moment by a team like the Saints. Nonetheless, we hope next season they can return with a full lineup of Lanquis ready to conquer the West! Iron Uzg Krugs - Freeport Pigeons In the final game of the week we saw the Krugs take on the Pigeons, their new nemeses. The last time these two clashed we saw the sudden death, the first in ABA history, of a Pigeon's player. This tragic loss continued its trend tonight as the entire starting lineup of the Pigeons was sent off the court, including the new Mister Albatross who had both of his wings dislocated. The Krugs fully dominated this game and have now clinched the fourth and final spot in the Western Conference. The Pigeons, on the other hand, have only managed to beat out the Rabbits and are rated the second-worst by experts in the ABA. Who even knows if they will stay around for next season?! STANDINGS The Western Conference Pos. Team Points Played Won Lost "+-" 1 Karosgrad Crows 34 21 17 4 172 2 San Luciano Saints 32 21 16 5 138 3 Varhelm Beserkers 28 21 14 7 191 4 Iron Uzg Krugs 26 21 13 8 121 5 Elysium Foxes 22 21 11 10 47 6 Yong Ping Dragons 22 21 11 10 -9 7 Elvenesse Bucks 10 21 5 16 -117 8 Vortice Krakens 6 21 3 18 -307 The Eastern Conference Pos. Team Points Played Won Lost "+-" 1 Fakhr Dunes 30 21 15 6 158 2 Kal'Darakaan Miners 26 21 13 8 106 3 Du Loc Flames 26 21 13 8 99 4 Providence Vigilants 22 21 11 10 8 5 Haelun'or Purifiers 16 21 8 13 -40 6 Talus Grove Druids 12 21 6 15 -143 7 Freeport Pigeons 12 21 6 15 -168 8 Rozania Rabbits 12 21 6 15 -256 AMATEUR DIVISION RESULTS AND STANDINGS Fennic Blizzards - Honeyhill Hedgehogs 78 - 84 Halcourt Eagles - Valwyck Bears 87 - 88 The Amateur Division Pos. Team Points Played Won Lost "+-" 1 Honeyhill Hedgehogs 38 21 19 2 157 2 Valwyck Bears 28 21 14 7 78 3 Fennic Blizzards 16 21 8 13 18 4 Halcourt Eagles 2 21 1 20 -259 Do you want to add your name to the roster of your favorite team? Are you interested in bucketball and want to learn more? Join our discord and supply us with your player's names so we can include you in our posts! https://discord.gg/UbdSZNrTFT