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MeteorDragon

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    [✗] [Magic Lore] - Gravity Evocation

    in Denied Lore

    Posted

    -Weird that it can only be learnt if someone already has a voidal MA. You could argue that Translo or Transfig is also a complex magic, even more complex than gravity, but you don't need to have another voidal magic
    -What does it mean for something to be an "Ability"? Seems odd that that's included, does it mean to differenciate between "Passive" and "Active"? If so, why not just use those indicators
    -Conjure Gravity seems kinda lame as far as Conjure spells go. It has little creativity and I think I can just do more with Alter Position or a Telekinetic limb
    -Orb is a MUCH more powerful gust. Shooting someone with an orc strength punch at T2? If we're comparing it to Gust, then a T2 gust makes someone feel uncomfortable. It's crazy to have it so strong
    -Why is Orb able to disarm? or cause a force on someone directly? Force caused by Gravity should be hitting someone with something physical by making something telekin- sorry, gravitationally shoot at them. A disarm should be a completely different spell if done at all
    -Why is Levitate its own thing? Just combine it with Conjure Gravity and call it a day, Conjure Gravity should be overall spell for Non-Combative use in this magic, just like other voidal magics
    -Gravitational Fluxdoesn't really explain what effect this has on the holder of the weapon, sure it changes weight, but does it also change density? If someone gets hit with something that has "halved weight" in the user's hands, does it do the same amount of damage as normal or does it do less? Why are the emote counts in the Redlines and not the mechanics? 5 block range is SUPER low. That's not even all of Quiet
    -Surged Resistance says in the redlines that it can be used for crowd control... why is that there? It's a radius spell is it not?
    -Surged Resistance says that it has a 5 block diameter, which is about a 2.5 block radius, but it doesnt say how far you can put this from yourself
    -Surged Resistance Why do divided by 3 on a T2 spell? It might work better if it was a scaling spell where the strength increased the higher of a tier you cast at
    -Feathery Feet: Same as Levitate, just add it to Conjure Gravity, and you should only passively be floating if you're connected
    -Can Attract be used to shoot projectiles into someone else? Can it be used on arrows and whatnot or only things like Earth and Life Evocation projectiles? What happens if a projectile made of gas comes at you? Technically that's still effected by gravity
    -Crush is a stupidly powerful spell, I believe. You only have 4 emotes that you have to cast it, not the usual 5 that super powerful spells have or the 6 that stuff like making a Tornado needs. You say it has a range of 15 blocks, does that mean that EVERYTHING in 15 meters of wherever is under this? So you could knock out everyone in a 15 meter radius (or kill) in 5 emotes if they're all standing there
    -Crush should not be able to kill, that's reserved for T5 spells, for the most part, but even then, people die from their injuries, not from being hit by the spell
    -How far away can you cast Crush?
    -For Gravitational Field, what's the effect it puts on people? What exactly does it do besides "making it harder to move"? What does that entail? Why does the range decrease if you put it in an area rather than around you? Is the mage also effected by this spell? Why does it last for 2 emotes after the mage stops concentrating? Losing/Stopping concentration should halt the spell from taking mana, thus ending it. This also feels a LOT less powerful than Crush which you said can KILL SOMEONE
    -Why does it take 18 weeks rather than the typical 16 that all other voidal magics, bar feats, have?


    Overall, it seems HEAVILY unbalanced and very rushed. Take more time on it, add more stuff, balance things more. Descriptions should add flavor to the lore, it shouldn't just be all about the spells, the descriptions are also good. Most spells don't have half a line explaining what the spell does(the italics parts you have). Also, you don't need that ST note. You get to pick grandfathers if it gets accepted(which it won't in this state tbh). Telekinesis would just be better than Gravity Evo, you can do everything this can and more

    15

    [Animatii Creation] [FA] SilverPlatter

    in Accepted Magic Apps

    Posted

    MC Name:

             SilverPlatter

     

    Character's Name:

             Itulan

     

    Character's Age:

             86

     

    What feat(s) will you be learning?

             Animatii Creation

     

    Teacher's MC Name:

             ECS1999

     

    Teacher's RP Name:

             Edvard

     

    Do you agree to keep Story updated on the status of your feat app?:

             Yes

     

    Have you applied for this feat on this character before, and had it denied? If so, link the app:

             No

     

    Are you aware that if this feat is shelved, it will be unavailable to use?

             Yes

     

    0

    Claim your Sorcerous Throne in Hohkmat

    in Other Realms

    Posted

    Name
    Sulieronn Ashwood-D'Avre

    Desired Moniker (If enthroned as a Lord/Lady-Magister)
    Lord Magister, however I don't wish for people to have to call me such

    Age
    170

    Date you wish to compete (You may choose more than one)
    Most likely all

    What are you wishing to compete for
    I wish to showcase my Magical Prowess and potentially gain a position in the city

     

    Justification
    To put it simply, I am one of the greatest in the magical field. I've created the art known as Veil Watching, an ability that allows Mages to keep track of the Veil and its integrity. Magic has been something I've wielded for almost a century now, I'm a little less than 6 years away from that marker, and it shows as my strength and knowledge have expanded. I wish to aid in the leading of new mages and ensure that they too can see the true use of the Void and what it has to offer.

    It is not those who lack power, who are weak, but those who have it and lack the knowledge to use it.

    2

    The Death of a Countess

    in Kingdom of Balian

    Posted

    An old man frowned at the news. He rested a hand to his forehead and let off a sigh, slowly shaking his head. "I'm glad you were who you were. You're one of the few I'm proud of." That man pushed hair back from his face, leaning back to look at the ceiling in his dim home. "Sorry, I won't be seeing you in the Seven Skies, daughter."

    8

    A Halfling's Life [PK]

    in Character Graveyard

    Posted

    A dark elven mage sat within his home, staring up at the ceiling as he dared not sleep. His mind raced, thinking back to the moments he'd shared with the halfling and he eventually sighed. "A shame... I won't be seeing you in the stars. If only you'd turned out more like me." Sulieronn spoke to himself.

    5
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