Love Sick Junkies Full of Scars

[KeiaTypeBeat 3277]

I miss the weight of your head 

As it rest upon my chest 

I miss your presence in my bed

Now no longer can I rest 

 

I miss your shape, your silhouette 

And the brightness of your smile 

I miss that prom dress that you kept 

Oh, our love it lasted for a while 

 

I miss the lies I miss the drama 

Oh the ways you would decieve me

I don't even wish you karma 

To do that much with all our history?

 

Your narcissistic pessimism had me convinced there for a while 

That I was broken dumb and stupid while you convinced yourself you were so guile 

I wisened up, I had enough, the way we acted was so vile 

I can't believe it was my dream for us to even have a child 

 

I miss the taste of your breath

Addicting like a cigarette 

All the same, a kiss of death 

Such a poignant epithet 

 

I miss the perfume that you'd wear

When did it all turn so sour 

I miss every dream we used to share

I used to fill the house with flowers

 

I miss the way you made me cry 

And the way you put me down 

Did our love even die?

If I could I'd make it drown

 

I wish the aching in my heart 

Would find relief without releasing 

All these feelings I don't want

It felt so perfect at the start

Had no need for people pleasing 

It was you I loved to flaunt 

 

And even now oh how I weep

Over promises you couldn't keep 

You were so scared you would be beat

But that was only ever me 

 

And even now you hit me up

And let's be real I have no honor 

I'm always down to say "what's up?"

Especially at those late night hours 

 

Your love was so addicting 

Stronger even than the nicotine 

That I breathe into my lungs 

We fell in love way too young 

 

Didn't know what we were doing 

Didn't know how to be treated 

Heartbreak oh it is so grueling 

Can't believe we got so heated 

 

I hurt you bad, you did the same 

And even now I'd rather blame 

It on myself, what can I say 

I like to choose the easy way 

 

I choose the path of least resistance 

These thoughts they can be so persistent 

Creator now, lend me assistance 

I'm struggling now to stay consistent 

 

I miss the way you made me feel 

I miss that way it felt so real 

I miss the dreams we used to share 

I miss the smell of your brown hair 

 

But I'm tired of the drama 

Maybe you deserve the karma 

Even now it hurts to say 

But damn it all it's not okay 

 

To take my love and optimism 

And say they're nothing but a symptom 

Of innocence and naivete 

From the trauma of my younger days 

 

Girl tell me now, what are you saying?

Love, I'm sorry, but you're depressed! 

You've gone mad, you must be playing!

You convinced me somehow to repress 

 

Years of coping, my hope eroded

You made me miserable just like you 

And so my patience, it imploded 

When I came to learn the truth 

 

All it took was a change of view

Learning perspectives that were new

What a healthy love should feel like 

What I found it sent a spike 

 

That shattered my whole world apart

It slowed the beating of my heart 

You were abusive right from the start 

Didn't see the signs until it was too far!

 

Years of abuse filled up my past 

And then I knew we couldn't last 

And oh it happened oh so fast 

And the pain was like a shotgun blast 

 

I'd rather it have been some lead 

Cuz at least then I would be dead 

Instead alone laying in this bed 

Thinking of the day we wed 

 

It's gonna hurt now for a while 

And even if I miss your smile 

We were toxic, self destructive 

Codependent, unproductive 

 

There is damage that you caused 

You tore my heart with your claws

It'll take some time for me to heal 

I still have pain that I have to feel 

 

And that's just life

It's who we are 

Love Sick Junkies full of scars

Put down the knife 

Leave that bar 

Lift your head up to the stars 

 

It'll be alright

It'll be okay 

Feel the pain of yesterday 

The future is bright 

Start a new day 

I hope someday you'll be okay 

 

Right now I'm not 

My heart's been shot

At least I know I'm not a bot 

That's a con of being real 

Being real comes with pain to feel

 

And hey, I'd rather be me than Chat GPT

A machine can't replace the part of me that bleeds

Somewhere in there's a reason to feel free

Like, even if it hurts, at least I still breathe

[Two2the 365]

1 hour ago, RezRatKeia said:

And hey, I'd rather be me than Chat GPT

[blackhand7 368]

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