Eokamaster

THE GRUBNAKH LAND ACT 11th of The Grand Harvest, 154 S.A Grubnakh dressed in a sick ******* suit in new camps built outside the goi Following the mass exodus of 1948, it seems our lands have been found barren, outstretched, and deserted! From the sprawling sea to the overgrown jungles, truly do these lands of the Horde call for new masters to settle! We seek those who shall inherit these lands, lest we waste such prime property on ork cattle drives and frogs from laklul shrines. For those who bear a name, a will, a motivation to take the reins of this new era we have found ourselves in. Come forth then to this goi of ours and make the claims of what land you desire in our control, and you shall take it for yourself! All that is required is your honor sworn to this horde! Send a letter to our head of office, Mog'mog of sandy shores, if land is what you seek!

KLAMOR TIME 18th of The Grand Harvest, 153 S.A The heroes of the new horde, conducting their new trainings learning the magics of battle for future wars Now evicted from my blarg in the swamps outside the goi, as the great toad with its legion of frogs who have seemingly learned the ancient norlandic spell of "ᚠᛚᛖᛖᛈᛖᚱ" and have used it in great capacity to break down my door and loot my chests. I find it most evident now as the new Rex, to survey the lands under my domain, and rally the klompas and shooters for our next great battle, our next great war. The presence of all vassals, protectorates, and tributaries is requested so we may once more find who remains in our new Horde. As well to now fix the gaps within our ranks, we seek to delegate the tasks and positions of honor within our ranks, those of Targoth, Yazurgagatan, Krimpgoth, Scripgoth, etc, as there seemingly has been a mass exodus of the old status quo to new and foreign lands. A depiction of the fleeing Horde bureaucrat We shall conduct this klamor of epic proportions in one kaktus weeks' time! SATURDAY 4:30PM EST. 11/11

THE ERA OF WAR The 14th of First Seed, 153 S.A Krug has willed it. Krug has adorned it. Krug has brought it. No longer shall uruks be led by cowards or sheeple. Let us build anew as Krug wills. Let this horde be bound by none, stalled by none. What each uruk brings, let him claim his rights himself. May this era of stagnation and peace remain forever damned in the annals of time. As the new rex, let these declarations be made: -All those who, in their honor, defended the coward rex, are free of all oaths and vows to he who flees from his own lands. -Those uruks who found themselves against us, heroes of the new age, let them be forgiven and brought back once more as brothers. -All those diplomats who bear weightless treatises, come forth with tributes anew. -All vassals, protectorates, and tributaries, come forth once more and reaffirm their allegiance to this new horde, this free horde. Let us find a new war, a proper war, a real honor and pride for this horde, for orks!

THE BRINGING OF A NEW ERA The 19th of First Seed, 152 S.A Is it not the honor of every orc to follow the will of Krug? Is it not our duty to tear down these acts of cowardice whenever they are seen? When we came to this fateful klamor , surrounded by our brothers, honoraries, ologs, uruks, gobbos, elves, and men, were we mistaken to have thought ourselves within the Iron Horde? When called for a tradition of time immemorial, an honorable challenge for the title of Rex, who has given you the right to dishonor our traditions by 'rejecting' it? What bureaucracy has taken hold of Krug's descendants? What cowardly cabal has found its roots in our home where honor and pride are as intertwined as the soul and body? Had Krug asked his lessers whether he may challenge his brothers? Had Krug not simply willed for it? Tell us, you loathsome knave, is it the turning tides of a new era that you fear, or is it who invokes the will of Krug? Has it not been time enough for this abhorrent excuse? What honor remains in these lands where an orc cannot challenge for his right, as brave Krug did centuries ago? The flames of war extinguished; the bright bloodlust that has been gifted unto every orc seemingly found dim. Have you not exhausted all that is good? Have we not suffered enough under pathetic stagnation and peace? We reject all that this horde is! We are a pride of lions only to find ourselves led by a cowardly sheep! What has occurred to honor and bravery? What has happened to our traditions lasting from the first of orcs? Surely, change will not come to those who remain standing, war will not come to those without pride, and certainly, honor will not come to those who flee! We shall tear down this accursed horde of cowards and weaklings, so that only the strong may rise from its ashes!

17th of the First Seed, 151 S.A Freedom, it calls upon every uruk, every goblin, every olog and honorary. This innate feeling given unto us by Krug himself. This longing comes not from hatred as the former declared, but it is simply what my soul yearns for. I had gathered the wise scholars of Mog and Lak alike, in contemplation, I thought as a pragmatic to uphold the status quo and fight off this challenger to maintain order. Yet my soul could not bear it. In a last effort, I had consulted with the everwise toad, and its legion of frogs encroaching upon the entrance of my blarg. I posed the question, and it met me with truth and knowledge beyond this realm. "What would Krug do?" Thus, do I make this declaration, as Swamppgoth of Lak and Targoth of the Horde, do I call heed to a tradition of time immemorial, an honorable klomp for the position of Rex. Signed, Targoth, Swampgoth, Holder of the Necronomicon Grubnakh the elf

Master wizard, renowned necromancer, and occasional targoth, Grubnakh the Elf, can be found polishing his thousandfold Nippon steel samurai blade outside the goi in Lak Village "It iz tik...twu kaktuz dayz"

16th of the Amber Cold, 150 S.A The following events are recollected and written by clan Mogs senior scribe Mog'Mog of the desert plains. In the very heart of the goi, gathered the swarm of Mog Goblins and Laks alike led by Grubnakh the Elf. Stood atop the highest ledge in the now defunct and dilapidated Kazin'kul home stood the Targoth, bellowing out for all to hear. "Zo dis mongled krump git, diz momble krump git zkahin baztaard wanz tu klomp fur rex?!" The mob of orks now gathered around were buzzin' with excitement, choppas clangin, bows firin' in the air, as the Targoth continued "Mi been loyal tu da rex, mi klomp vur da rex, mi flatz fur da rex, mi waaaaagh vur da Rex!" The beast paused for a moment. readjusting the rotting head masking its face "Zo mi iz peepin mi da biggest, da baddest warboss uv da horde! Mi haz a dezicision tu mak n' mi iz makin zure all deze orks iz gunna be there! Wi iz gunna klamor, wi iz gonna klomp, wi iz gonna chooze uz own future! In threee kaktuz dayz bruddaz! Nub furget patriotrz iz in kontrol!" And so the beast along with its warband headed back to the Lak Village, where Grubnakh could be seen casting bub'hozh magic spells and other feats of pure intellect. FRIDAY, 3PM EST, IN THE GOI.

24th of the Amber Cold, 149 SA Throm'ka brothers of the Horde, once again I write to you lot in a recent discovery I have made that will assist in our future battles. In my last journey up north into Norland, I have found a dangerous and powerful Necronomicon which has allowed me to cast some real hozh spells. Any uruks who wish to come learn my magiks, come meet me in the goi, you will find me casting many horrible and terrible spells in ancient Norlandic blah. Mayhaps I shall be building a mojo tower, where I may cast spells all over the goi upon our enemies. Gug'ye Signed, Holder of the Necronomicon, Caster of Dangerous magiks, Targoth, Swampgoth, All around hozh urukim, Grubnakh the elf

10th of the Grand Harvest, 147 S.A Good brothers of the horde, it may come as a surprise that I, Grubnakh the elf, am able to now write so coherently. I come out now to the world that I am indeed literate. My life up until this fateful point has been controlled by various means of narcotics, I had been a complete and total addict. Now I have overcome my addiction, I wish to return the favor to the horde that has made me the elf that I am. Bear witness to my endless treasures that I had held so dear and spent so fruitlessly upon my drug fueled addiction. [!] A picture depicting the treasury in which Grubnakh holds his riches I write this letter as a means of rebirth, and to bring rejuvenation to these seemingly now desolate clans of our great Iron Horde. The money provided from me serves to enrich the klompin n' flattin of our most proud orks, and as well to provide the much-needed infrastructure for the autonomy of these great clans. To the good clan of the kazin'kuls, from my treasury you shall receive a small loan of ten thousand minae. And to the good lak clan which has found itself barren, dry, and without leadership I give you myself so you may find yourselves once more under the leadership of a wise and ever-powerful ork. And as well I shall endow the lak clan with a supplement of twenty thousand minae, so they may ever be fruitful in their future battles. And to whichever uruk of no regard bears the title of swampgoth, know well this is not only a reward but challenge for your position, we shall klomp soon. Signed, The Most-everwise and wealthy, Targoth Grubnakh the elf, Swampgoth of the lak clan.

Six isn't enough, probably 24 hours. PvP is too easy

Peter Frostbeard would clench his fist and slam his desk, tears rolling down his face "You bastard Ireheart! I'll nevah forgiv ye for killin Sorviiss! Not Sorvis, you bastard!"

♫♫♫♫ GRUBNAKH’S GUIDE TO KLOMPIN Mi haz been peepin som da bruddaz need know wat tu do fur klompin. Mi grubankh da elf…nub grubanakh da human haz grubbed un some pinkeh brains an learned zo much. Peep wat mi iz drawin, tiz iz da roiiiight way tu klompin yuub. Zo zimple, all mi ork bruddaz needa tak notz, wriiite diz down yub. Scribed by Grubnakh’s smarter less ology brother, Grubgraass.

Peter Frostbeard would be in awe of the smart maneuver by the Frostbeard clan to use the previous missive in order to lure the norlanders in! He would then begin to write a thesis on the morals of norlanders having learned that murder is passable, death by crucifixion welcomed even but All-father forbid.....

Aggravated norlander and occasional dwarf Peter Frostbeard would look at this missive and make a moral stance against ransoming enemies whilst sacrificing the captured to a burning tree!

Peter Frostbeard would smile upon remembering how he slew Torrhen and countless other norlanders at the battle.