A Large Crown In Nimble Hands

[Heff 2460]

 

The crown was off in a flash, along with the thief. Screams erupted in the palace as a small halfling boy evaded big legs. He was a blur amongst confused nobles and guards. After sneaking out of the palace the thief made his way down the steps and into the city, quickly approaching The Hadrian Wall. A large man stood before him, long weapon drawn.

"Halt Halfman. Give me the lady's goods."

The "half man's" small carrot was no match for the man's carrot saber. 

He would have to trick his way out of this one.

The halfling hurled an egg and carrot at the man, escaping quickly. 

Soon he tripped, getting hit from behind with a potato. The Carrot-Man's accomplice Richie, had stopped the mad-dashing hobbit. Soon he was cornered, but the crown was nowhere to be seen, only a cake taken from the castle, he was prepared. As an Orenian Noble came to the standoff as well. The halfling began to spew about how his abusive father had forced him into it, and that he didn't actually have the crown. He explained how his evil pa beat him, and had stolen the crown from the princess.

Soon the Noble threatened to trade the hobbit's life for the crown.

This made the carrot and potato men angry, killing a half man is pure evil! As the three began to quarrel the hobbit quickly made his way off, whistling his favorite tune 

"Fumble 'ventures erryday, erryday. Fum'le ventures erryday..."

As the classic tune was sung by the boy, he made his way back to his hideout, happy.

A sealed letter soon finds its way to the Imperial Castle, on the back

of a muddy, and tired, fat pig.

 

                                                                    

 

 Dear Royal Peoples,

We have a list of insults for you to read. After reading them all we will not  return your crown.

Here is our list:

You suck munchkin nipps.

You are as fat as my pig.

You can't drink more than an ounce of ale.

Rethink your idiotic biggun lives.

You can't beat us.

You all can't break-dance like a halfling can.

If anyone tattles, we'll tickle ya to death.

Just go home, and eat your mum's meatloaf.

Have a bad day, like every other biggun day.

​Sincerely,

The Pig Thief

The Sky Thief

 

P.S we are sh*ting in your crown.

P.P.S Don't take this personally, we just had a little fun cause we know you are rich enough to make a new one.

 

[Helvetius 314]

Rand snorts and scratches his chin, "I heard the Prince will just order to have a new one made..." His eyes return to the nobles who just as quickly forgot about the halfling and continued to stumble around drunk.

[Watyll 1104]

Rand snorts and scratches his chin, "I heard the Prince will just order to have a new one made..." His eyes return to the nobles who just as quickly forgot about the halfling and continued to stumble around drunk.

 

"I doubt the thief cares. Crowns are worth an awful lot of money, yes?"

[AlmondTree 418]

*With her crown taken, she sighs deeply wishing for the head of the half-ling along with the crown to be given to her.*

[Helvetius 314]

"I doubt the thief cares. Crowns are worth an awful lot of money, yes?"

"Nope. I could make more money selling ale in the next three days than what he would make in a week of searching for someone to buy it."

[Birdwhisperer 1174]

Moved to the Great Library. It shall be sorted into appropriate category shortly.