I DONT CARE IF ELVES MAKE HUNKING GOLEM BOYFRIENDS

[sneakybandit 1650]

 

 

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ᛏᚺᛖ × ᛚᛟᛊᛏ × ᚨᚱᛏ - ᚨᚾᛞ × ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚲᚢᛚᛏᚢᚱᚨᛚ × ᚲᚱᚢᛏᚲᚺ

 

THE LOST ART

AND

THE CULTURAL CRUTCH

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᛚᛟᛊᛏ × ᚨᚱᛏ - ᚨᚾᛞ × ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚲᚢᛚᛏᚢᚱᚨᛚ × ᚲᚱᚢᛏᚲᚺ

 

---

 

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚺᛁᛊᛏᛟᚱᛁ

THE HISTORY

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚺᛁᛊᛏᛟᚱᛁ

 

IN the ancient days, when URGUAN still learned at the forge of the WORLDMAKER. Many early forms of art were developed, such as writing, carving, smithing, crafting, GOLEMANCY, and RUNESMITHING. It is a commonly accepted fact that URGUAN was the first of his brothers to learn these methods.

 

Dwarven inventors first developed all these things; our runes are the first known written language, and we developed methods of refining and alloying all sorts of metals used around the world. But of all these inventions, only one is worthy of reverence.

 

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚨᚱᛏ × ᛟᚠ × ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚱᚢᚾᛖᛚᛟᚱᛞᛊ

THE ART OF THE RUNELORDS

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚨᚱᛏ × ᛟᚠ × ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚱᚢᚾᛖᛚᛟᚱᛞᛊ

 

In the ancient HALLS OF URGUAN, the first RUNELORDS emerged as the direct students of URGUAN. Only his most trusted children were gifted with the knowledge imparted upon him by the WORLDMAKER. The power of these first RUNELORDS was amazing and horrible at the same time. Modern figures such as Arch-Runelord Zahrer shrivel in comparison to even the weakest member of the First Triumverate.

 

The masters of the First Triumvirate mastered the runes, able to speak them into existence as the WORLDMAKER had. Runes they carved into the flattest of plains would sprout mountain chains overnight; they had truly mastered the creation of the WORLDMAKER.

 

And of all his kin, what dwarf learned the most from our FORGEFATHER? Which dwarf took the lessons learned and became a true master of the runes as URGUAN had? PHERAX IRONBORN was URGUAN’S most gifted student; his raw talent was unsurpassed, and his creations were legendary. 

 

This fact might confuse some of you; I doubt many of you even know who PHERAX is. In recent centuries, entirely fictitious stories have sprouted up claiming ‘this ancestor of mine was the BEST runesmith.’ Or ‘my ancestor was URGUAN’S best student.’ All of these claims are false, for it was the youngest son of the Blood-Emperor VELKAN who our FORGEFATHER saw the most potential in.

 

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚠᛟᚱᚷᛟᛏᛏᛖᚾ × ᚱᚢᚾᛖᛚᛟᚱᛞ

THE FORGOTTEN RUNELORD

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚠᛟᚱᚷᛟᛏᛏᛖᚾ × ᚱᚢᚾᛖᛚᛟᚱᛞ

 

Now you might ask, if this PHERAX was the most powerful RUNELORD, then why is he forgotten? Is it because of his clan? What did he do in the blood age?

 

It is because his story does not fit into the narrative. Many Ironborn were called to learn runesmithing from URGUAN’S forge. All of them, save URGUAN’S, twisted the WORLDMAKER’S ultimate tool into the creation of BLOOD RUNES. 

 

Why was PHERAX different? As the star student of the FORGEFATHER, he was chosen for greater things. He was separated by his corrupted father for many decades, learning from URGUAN’S personal anvil. And so, when the BLOOD AGE began, PHERAX was revolted by the atrocities of his kin, especially when VELKAN had the First Triumverate purged.

 

He escaped the massacre and became the only RUNELORD to fight against  VELKAN. And the only Ironborn to turn against his father.

 

Eventually, with his father defeated, the dwarves began to rebuild. But even though he rendered great aid to the revolt against the Blood-Emperor, PHERAX was ostracized for his blood. Causing the greatest RUNELORD to withdraw from society.

 

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚱᛁᛊᛖ × ᛟᚠ × ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚷᛟᛚᛖᛗᛊ

THE RISE OF THE GOLEMS

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚱᛁᛊᛖ × ᛟᚠ × ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚷᛟᛚᛖᛗᛊ

 

It took centuries for runes to return to our people, and even then, no runesmith could come close to claiming they held a fraction of the power of our ancestors. The only scraps of knowledge that could be reclaimed were those lessons deemed insignificant and not worthy of destruction. These were exercises made for apprentice runesmiths. This was how Golemancy came to be.

 

In the absence of proper runesmithing, golemancy became a staple of our people. Even this small portion of the RUNELORDS' power was invaluable and was highly sought after by many people. This led to countless anvil thefts and greedy teachers who sought to make a quick buck by teaching our sacred rituals to Elgi and Umri.

 

It was a natural occurrence for us to be outraged at this; it was ours, and it was being stolen.

 

Eventually, a lesser form of proper Runesmithing was recovered by the Second Triumvirate. But just like golemancy, its secrets were sold for greed and personal gain.

 

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᛊᛖᚲᛟᚾᛞ × ᛈᚢᚱᚷᛖ

THE SECOND PURGE

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᛊᛖᚲᛟᚾᛞ × ᛈᚢᚱᚷᛖ

 

These RUNELORDS grew too greedy, and so they were smitten down at the hands of vile entities. But Golemancy stubbornly endured.

 

With Runesmithing gone, Golemancy became the only dwarven ‘art’ that remained to us. But even by then, more than half of all golemancers were elves. In our grief at the loss of our runes, we clung to this shred of the WORLDMAKER’S power like a baby clings to its mother. 

 

And so, we became overreliant on it. Golems were built in exorbitant numbers, tasked to accomplish many things that dwarves had no need for a golem to do.

 

ᛟᚢᛖᚱᚱᛖᛚᛁᚨᚾᚲᛖ

OVERRELIANCE

ᛟᚢᛖᚱᚱᛖᛚᛁᚨᚾᚲᛖ

 

When built in such numbers, our golems slowly became less and less powerful. Whatever power that remained to our runes was stretched to its limit, and they broke. I ask you now, what is even the point of building obedient servants when they are no longer obedient? Golems are now mass-produced and have no significance in our society.

 

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚲᚱᚢᛏᚲᚺ × ᛟᚠ × ᛟᚢᚱ × ᚲᚢᛚᛏᚢᚱᛖ

THE CRUTCH OF OUR CULTURE

ᛏᚺᛖ × ᚲᚱᚢᛏᚲᚺ × ᛟᚠ × ᛟᚢᚱ × ᚲᚢᛚᛏᚢᚱᛖ

 

In recent times, we have made an effort to purge Elgi and Umri golemancers. But what has this even achieved? There are so many now that it is a near-impossible task. Our state was weak, so we relied on feigned might and diplomatic relations to beg other realms not to tolerate its spread.

 

This became, for some stupid reason, the only focus on our leaders. When time, effort, and funding could be better spent in countless other directions.

 

But Darid, I already hear you whine. Muh Golemancy is dwarven, Elgi are tainting it!

 

No shit, but it has already been tainted for centuries, and we taint it ourselves in our over-reliance on it.

 

How can you say such a thing! You outrage next. I ask you, URGUAN invented many things besides Golemancy. He invented smithing, but do you desire to impose limits on how many nails a human smith can make in a year? We carved the first runes, so have we burnt Norland down for copyright infringement? 

 

Obviously not, so why do we pick and choose what we enforce when we humiliate and degrade our own practices at home?

 

ᚹᚺᛁ × ᛞᛁᛞ × ᛁ × ᚹᚱᛁᛏᛖ × ᛏᚺᛁᛊ

WHY DID I WRITE THIS

ᚹᚺᛁ × ᛞᛁᛞ × ᛁ × ᚹᚱᛁᛏᛖ × ᛏᚺᛁᛊ

 

A very fair question, sometimes I do not know the inner workings of my brain. But I am tired of seeing young beardlings with their servus golems when they should be working in the mines themselves.

 

Also, every dwarf who uses their shitty servus golems to retrieve missives for them and then BURN THEM makes me want to CRASH OUT. 

 

GET SOME EXERCISE, WALK TO YOUR OWN DAMN MAILBOX

===================

 

Signed,

Darid Irongrinder.

 

P.S.

 

As per usual, I am open to any debate, but this was just more rant than anything else.

 

Spoiler

I wrote this one on my lunch break lmao, gotta get back to bombing Iran now. I might write one about the forest dwarves after work or tomorrow.

 

[Riot 743]

Deep in the ground, Dorin Starbreaker is brought another missive by his servus golem while his Anaimii constructs and himself are hard at work investigating metals and materials. One of which brings him a new tool with a little dinging of the bell as he reads the missive and promptly tosses it into the fire of his forge

 

[Carson 1165]

Spoiler

Excited to see what you come up with re: forest dwarves. Were you planning to do so previously or did my character's response inspire it? I wanna know the scoop!

 

P.S. Love the clickbait titles, got a good laugh outta those.

 

[wowj 9747]

"Don't listen to him, Rocky." An Elf said to his Golem.