Galendar 631 Share Posted May 30, 2015 A long time ago, there was a young man. This young man's name was Gilbert the Bootymeister. Gilbert was a funny little lad. His original ser name is Heinz, like the ketchup brand. When he was born, he did not cry. Only a single tear leaked from his gentle eyes, gracing the world with his first and only tear. Gilbert, otherwise known as Gibby growing up, went on to like many a women. When Gilbert turned 16, he had a single wish... the booty. He was so centered around the idea of getting the booty that it became his life. All he cared of was booty. He craved the booty, he wished for it, and in the end, fell for it. Gibby created an order solely devoted to the booty and gaining such a prize. To join, one must truly dedicate their life to the booty and all who hath a good one. Many a young, hormonal teenager struck to join the order, but few were worthy. After another two years, Giblit took the mantel title of "Bootymeister". The been below him were termed Booty Hunters and served him without question. The rise of such a powerful force in the north struck fear into the Papacy, and was met with the fist of the faith. A crusade was declared on the Bootymeister and his men. They were pinned against a mighty foe, the Catholic bovines! Gasp! The ultimate square off.... Booty versus the Cross... The two armies met on the field of battle in an old Germanic territory that didn't really matter. There was few words, but much action. Both sides charged towards the other, one calling "FOR THINE BOOTY!" the other, "AVE MARIA!". When the two forces met, the Bootymeister crossed blades with two of the greatest enemies he would ever face in his life... Eddy Murphy and Morgan Freeman. Both of these men were fabled crusaders who were said to have been gods of war. They fought for many an hour, but there was only one outcome. It is obvious the Bootymeister was struck down in battle against Morgan Freeman and his close friend, Eddy Murphy. Some even say once Eddy struck him down with one swipe of his sword, Giblit grabbed the supple rump of the famous black man. He silently whispered to Eddy... ever so silently, "Ogres have layers..." and with that, a crack of thunder resounded out as Shrek descended from the heavens and let out the almighty rally call... "DUNKEEEEHHHH" It is said that due to Gibson the Bootymeister, the Catholic Church is known for touching little boys on the rump, but it is just speculation. -Galendar/Grant Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rassidic 470 Share Posted May 30, 2015 you have sinned , my child may god have mercy on your soul Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knox213 10 Share Posted August 2, 2015 Moved to the Archive. It shall be sorted into the appropriate category shortly. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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