Cursing In Style

[Nonival 147]

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WELCOME!

Do you play LOTC? Does your character have the mouth of a sailor? Are you tired of using those boring, modern day insults?

WELL YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE!

Within LOTC, our characters are constantly expressing themselves. It's time we start getting less offensive and more creative in the language we use.

This guide will help you discover more ways to display frustration or give your foes the what for. 

 

 

LOTC INSLUTS

 

- Dagger-eared (Elven)

- Iblee's Spawn 

- Munchkin (Halfling)

- Adri (Ancient Elven for evil/immoral)

- Glob (Blah for fool)

- Hyll (Sevent for ugly)

- No-beard (Dwarven... don't say this to a dwarf please)

 

SHAKESPEAREAN INSULTS

[Modified]

 

"The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes."

- The Comedy of Erros (Act 5, Scene 4)

 

"The rankest compound of villainous smell that ever offended nostril"

- The Merry Wives of Windsor (Act 3, Scene 5)

 

"If only you were clean enough to spit upon."

- Timon of Athens (Act 4, Scene 3)

 

"Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage"

- As You Like It (Act 2, Scene 3)

 

"More of your conversation would infect my brain."

- The Comedy of Erros (Act 2, Scene 3)

 

"A most notable coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality." 

- All's Well That Ends Well (Act 3, Scene 6)

 

"His wit's as thick as the desert kestrel's feathers."

- Henry IV Part 2 (Act 2, Scene 4)

 

"If you seek to mary, marry a fool; for wise men know well enough what monsters you make of them."

- Hamlet (Act 3, Scene 1)

 

"Leather-jerkin, crystal-button, knot-pated, puke-stocking, caddis-garter, smooth-tongue, [Waldenian/Uruk/Malin born/etc.] pouch!"

- Henry IV Part 2 (Act 1, Scene 4)

 

"You are as a candle, the better burnt out."

- Henry IV Part 2 (Act 1, Scene 2)

 

This is but a few examples! There are plenty more Shakespearean insults to go around.

 

LORD OF THE RINGS INSULTS

 

"I would cut off your head, dwarf, if it stood but a little higher from the ground."

- Éomer

 

"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."

- Bilbo

 

"What is the house of [house name] but a thatched barn where brigands drink in the reek, and their brats roll on the floor among the dogs?"

- Saruman

 

"What office of less honor would you accept? To carry a sack of meal up into the mountains- if any man would trust you with it?"

- Éomer

 

"Begone, foul [name], lord of carrion!'

- Éowyn

 

"The sooner you depart from my land the better it will please me."

- Eol

 

OTHER GEEKY INSULTS

 

"You are so mercifully free of the ravages of intelligence."

- Evil, Time Bandits

 

"We all have something to bring to this discussion. But I think from now on the thing you should bring is silence."

- Arnold Rimmer, Red Dwarf

 

"Well, my days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle."

- Malcom Reynolds, Firefly

 

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go."

- Oscar Wilde

 

"Your brain's so minute that if a hungry cannibal cracked your head open, there wouldn't be enough to cover a small water biscuit."

- Black Adder, Black Adder

 

"I'll explain and I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand, you warthog-faced buffoon."

- Westley, The Princess Bride

 

Was this just an excuse to share some of my favorite, clever insults? Probably. 

Should I retitle this to Insulting in Style? That's also a probably.

Are there any appropriate insults or curses I should include? Comment down below.

Why is this in a billion different colors? Because we are talking about c o l o r f u l language, of course.

 

 

LET THE (appropriate and less offensive) INSULTS FLY!

[Guest]

I approve of this. Nice post 

[Zacho 2177]

fine, have my rep

[Lark 2227]

You forgot french taunting!!!!!!!