[Denied]Paintballz Second App! :d

[Paint 51]

Out-Of-Character

Minecraft Account Name:

paintballz

How old are you?:

I am 16 years of age.

Time-Zone/Country of Residence:

Canada eh?

(UTC-07:00) Mountain Time (US & Canada)

Do you have a good grip on the English language/good grammar?:

Yes I think I do, but I am human I will make mistakes from time to time.

Small 2-3 Sentence Description of yourself:

I am Paint but my real name is Hunter. Free feel to call me either, I'm a good guy and I try to be as calm an positive as I can be. As while being as nice as I can be to everyone. Like a stereotype Canadian I really enjoy nature (why I choose a elf) like camping and skiing.

How much time could you be on the server weekly?:

I can be on the server (depending) anywhere from 10-20 hours. Daily 1-6 hours.

What do you know about Roleplaying? Give a definition of what it means to you:

Well Role-playing is when someone takes a role, such as a character(s) and making a story with the character, and to be me it’s what I love to do, such as D&D (Dungeons and Dragons) or from my new found love Skyrim.

What experience have you had in Roleplaying, if any?:

Well I have been role-playing since I was a kid, me and my friends use to play a game we called “The Watchmen” we each would make a character and we would go outside and play. Like I was an Rouge and I would steal treasure from my friends. It was the best. But, When I found the internet when I was 11, I played on line in a chat room, it was a warriors role play (based on the books by Erin Hunter) after that I did World of War craft, and then I tried D&D with my friends. Now my lover Skyrim and soon Guild wars 2!

In your own Words, define what the act of Meta-Gaming is:

Meta-Gaming is when someone gives their character(s) Information that the character did not know Like for explain someone kills your family and you are gone hunting or something and when you are gone you know it who did it even thou you are not there or not seem it happen.

In your own Words, define what the act of Power-Emoting is:

Power Emoting is giving your character power that is unfair or just over powered such as "my arrow goes through the steel wall out though 5 cows skulls hitting the king" or get being God Emoting like "Im the god of nature listen to me!" or simply the player giving the character god like powers.

In your own Words, define what Out of Character (OOC) is:

Out of Character is when you go from In Character, to talking about something that happened last night or a news story, when you are not in character.

In your own Words, define what In Character (IC) is:

A character is a person or thing for you to play. Like for explain I want to play WoW I make an character like a Orc named fluffypanda (very manly name by the way) and i play as this Character, and I make him a background, like I'm from the blood-brother tribe as the top warrior! Or a skilled shaman.

What do you expect this server will be like?:

Well I had walked around a little bit and only one word can describe what I saw:

AMAZING. Unlike most servers everyone was roleplaying! it look like a lot of fun and the GM's were really nice and helpful I have never seen such an amazing server.

What other server(s) have you played on and why did you leave them?:

Tethyscraft.net: the tethyscraft is a Hunger Games themed server with an open arena players fight in very much like the books, on the server I was an Builder, Game master (ran the arena with an team)Head Game master, and finally Admin. The server fate was sad, no admins had the cash to play for the flees of the server.

Have you read, understood, and agreed to the rules?:

Yes I have read the rules a couple of times :)

Do you promise to abide by said rules, and laws? This includes the Server, Forum, and Teamspeak set Rules:

Yes I do!

How did you hear about us?:

I googled RP servers back in April I believe and made an application and denied and give up. But, when Tethyscraft was shut down I wanted something new some I wanted to try again.

Have you previously made an Application? If so could you link us to your last Application?:

http://www.lordofthecraft.net/forum/index.php?/topic/66093-paintballzs-app/

In-Character:

Character Name:

Kihew

What Race are you? (You may only be Human, Orc, Elf or Dwarf!) :

Elf :)

What Sub-Race are you? (note, you aren’t required to have a sub-race):

N/A pure elf.

Biography (Please make this at least 2 paragraphs long. This must include the history of your character and his life as well as age, appearance and personality, etc.):

I was born 25 years ago. i was an member of a tribe I cannot remember, till I was 5, when my wonderful mother took me and my best friend Niyaa away from the abuse of my father, to Menorcress where I spend my children hood learning the art of hunting and learning to embrace nature, Niyaa often would follow the towns various healer to learn of herbs. We spend most of our spend time together. I would often try to teach Niyaa of hunting but, she never picked it up. We seemed to grow closer together, much closer when I was 16 when my mother died of Ki'katta. I didn’t know what to do. Niyaa helped me anyway she could.

My Life was really good, I later married Niyaa and had one son Keia. Who loved with all my heart but my life would later change when The Infamous Plague ripped its way into my town, Niyaa and Keia got infected by the infamous plague Niyaa send me to the forest to find pine needles and raspberries to try to help out our son. I ran as fast as I could. I found the stuff but it was too late, the plague took their lives from me, which was when my life was changed, I did not want any help. Friends tried to help, but the only thing that helped was nature, I meditated every day, but I'm still not sure of my place in the world. I don't want anyone to feel this pain, so I try to help everyone I can. Because I know how it feels to lose everything, and I don’t want others to be stuck in that place. So I give what I can spend to the people who need it.

I was born with eyes the colour of a fresh spring’s glass, and locks of pure brown hair. I have gained scars from my hunts and gathering.

What are your Character's ambitions?:/color]

To travel nature till I find peace inside myself, I found out my place in the world. Along with what else my travels find to make me happy.

What is your character’s favorite tool? (sword, pickaxe, shovel, etc):

The bow and arrow i was trained by my mother when I was a kid.

What is one of your Character's most skilled talents?

The bow and arrow is my best skill, but I'm also an skilled hunter and gather, because I often had to gather food and water for Niyaa, my mother and my son.

A screenshot of your skin (must be in proper format, if you do not know how to acquire one, copy and paste this link into your browser: ( http://tinyurl.com/Lotcscreenshot ):

Other Information about your Character:

Sometimes i trend to push people away from the fear of them getting too close to me and then losing them.

Open-Response-Questions

Each and every question must be answered with a minimum of a single full paragraph and entirely in RP.

Whilst traveling from the Cloud Temple you see a small Halfling, being harassed by two armed warriors. They appear to be trying to steal money from him, how does your character respond?

I pull up my hood then go to found a hiding spot, when I find a hiding spot, were I can see the warriors, I follow up and listen in to what is happening knowing I can’t take down the warriors, I wait till they take his coins then when the warriors are gone, I sneak out of the my spot walk over to the Halfling, sit down, brew some tea and offer an cup to the Halfling, then I reach into my coin purse and takeout ¾ of my coins and put them next to the Halfling “I’m sorry about your lost, I hope this is amount coins.” Then I walk away.

Your character wanders into Alras, and comes across a small stall, behind which a well-dressed man is standing. He’s offering various wares, the merchant turns to you and says in a posh accent " 'ello there, what can I do you for today?" What is your character response?

"Hello good sir! i would like to buy any food you can offer" then I slip my hand into my coin purse and pull out a handful of coins, that is a lot more than the cost of the food " I hope this is an price you were thinking of." I take the food on the corner then I take the food walk a few steps and say "look, I noticed that you don't have any deer meat? Bad hunting spot? Try the east woods" and then I walk away.

Whilst wandering in the wilds, your character comes across a small hut, which looks abandoned. Inside it you see a chest containing a few iron bars, and a golden sword. How would your character respond?:

i look for any other items I can take to the poor when I am happy with what I found, I take the items inside of the chest then I journey off to the local town and give the items I found to the poor and tell the poor to go to the market and sell for as much food and water you can then i slip a few coins into the pockets of each of the poor I help.

Hungry and lost in the wilderness, you stumble across a small trading camp nestled among the forest, they greets you in the common tongue, how do you respond?

"Hello! My misfortune has caused me to get lost, I have some items here I want to trade for a possible bed and some food?" I reply in common tongue and then I pull out the items and show the man the items to the man to try to trade for as much food I can get.

You hear word that bandits occupy the road outside the town in which you have been staying. The town guard have gathered, and are asking for assistance to help eliminate them. The leader of the party is offering a reward for any who offers their support. How does your character act on this information?:

I take up the offer to help out the town guard, and I help with the bandits with as much skill in my shots as I possibly can. After the job is done, I look in the bodies for any items I can either use or give away to help others. When I get the reward I take 25% and then give the coins and the items I can't use to the poor.

Anything else you would like to say?:I can't wait to be-able to join such an amazing server, truly the 5 mins on the server I saw was stunning and amazing.

[James Undercroft 129]

I enjoyed reading your application, but currently it is not a standard which I can accept onto this server.

I do see quite a large amount of effort put into this application, and potential for you to become a great roleplayer so I shall attempt to be as in depth and specific as possible with my feedback.

I am very sorry, but your application has been moved to the denied section of the forums. There are numerous reasons for this, all of which I have included in my feedback below this message. In the mean time there is an abundant source of information, stories, guides and other helpful tips to get you on your way to being accepted; all you need to do is look around. I would suggest the lord of the craft wiki and application submissions section of the forums to start off your little quest to make the best application. Good luck!

The reasons that I have denied you are:

Your have used incorrect formatting of the application.

You've messed up the BB code less than half way down which makes it difficult to discern question from answer. Thus, I would like you to fix this.

If you don't know how then please just send me a message over the forums and I shall give you detailed instructions so that these errors do not occur in the future.

Your grammar makes sections of your application hard to understand.

Your spelling and grammar is not exactly a strong point of your application. I would like you to spell check your application first, and then later read over it at least once to make sure that you've corrected your grammar. Such things as including full stops and commas in the correct places, as well as using the right words in the right places.

RPGs or Role-Playing Games are not RP’s.

Games such as World of Warcraft, Skyrim, Rift or similar do not count as Roleplaying as there is no person to person interaction within a Roleplaying scenario (unless of course you were on a Roleplaying server in which you need to explain where and how you role-played to show your understanding of the term).

I would also like to point out that with a name such as "fluffypanda" you probably were not on a roleplaying server or you were roleplaying incorrectly. Please do note that roleplaying only constitutes roleplaying if you are IC through the interactions.

Your definition of power-emoting is incorrect.

In lord of the craft we use an RP definition of power-gaming, rather than an RPG definition. While these may seem like the same thing, we can loosely judge that an RPG definition would fit in with games such as World of Warcraft or Skyrim, and the RP definition would fit in with games such as D&D or other person to person Roleplaying. Please do not confuse the definition we use to the definition that other Roleplaying groups may use, relating to creating a character which is too powerful, or doing an “overpowered” action; this is not the definition we use. To make sure you have the correct definition you can either have a look at the Lord of the Craft wiki, or by joining our Team Speak channel (send me a message if you need help getting started) and asking an experienced member. I would also like you to include an example of the term as it demonstrates your understanding of the concept.

You need to have a character last name.

Unless you have a specific reason for why you do not have a last name of your character, you need to write a last name to show that you have put some in-depth thought processes into developing and creating your character.

Your biography needs improvement.

At the moment it is... barely acceptable. It shows rather standard use of server lore (Which is okay!) but from your biography, your skills at creating stories or other roleplay-like situations is rather lacking. The story itself, while perhaps fitting in the server's theme, is portrayed rather basically without much form of justification. This is the "Why's", why did this happen? The reasoning behind the actions of the story.

The Infamous Plague ripped its way into my town, Niyaa and Keia got infected by the infamous plague Niyaa send me to the forest to find pine needles and raspberries to try to help out our son. I ran as fast as I could. I found the stuff but it was too late, the plague took their lives from me, which was when my life was changed, I did not want any help.

What is this "Infamous Plague"? Where does it come from? Why is it in the city? Why are Elves effected so? Why would pine needles and raspberries help at all?

In my person opinion the whole idea of having a loved one then having a unknown, unsubscribed and rather spontaneous plague wipe them out is fundamentally flawed.

This is a single example, go through your entire biography and attempt to making the story more realistic and flow more. If you need further assistance please contact me.

Some or all of your answers to the Open Response questions need improvement.

Instead of describing what your character would do, you need to assume that your character is in the situation and acting as they would in that situation. You need to describe a scene of RP. This means that you cannot write “If this happens, then my character would do that.” As this shows that you are not Roleplaying, you are answering the question from what you think that your character might do. You need to show us that you know who your character is, you know what the situation is and you know how your character is going to react.

This also means that you need to write in full RP. For example:

Josh talks to the shopkeeper, buys a few apples, pays the shop keeper and leaves. X BAD

Josh walks up to the man standing behind the rough oaken market stand. The sounds of a busy market can be heard all around him. An annoying fly buzzes around his head, so he absent-mindedly begins to inefficiently swat it away. “Ah, greetings shopkeeper! I was just browsing your wares.” The shopkeeper nods at Josh and then turns towards another customer to attempt to assist them the way all market shopkeepers must. Suddenly Josh felt a slight tugging sensation on his belt. He was about to brush it off as nothing, perhaps just someone bumping into him until he realised his belt was slightly lighter. He noticed a man beginning to run off in the opposite direction of himself. He glanced down to see that his coin purse was missing. He put two and two together and then shouted at the top of his lungs. “STOP THEIF!”… √ GOOD!

We expect that you write in full RP and that you write a full paragraph or more for each question.

If you have any questions about my feedback, or would like to create some constructive criticism about the way I give feedback (I.E am I being TOO blunt, or am I coming across rude) then please send me a message! I take all questions, none are stupid! :) You are not allowed to apply again for a full 24 hours.

[James Undercroft 129]

Moved to Denied Forum