[Denied]Elf Zeus4365

[Zeus4365 0]

Minecraft Account Name: Zeus4365
How old are you?: 13
Time-Zone: EST
Have you read, understood and agreed to the rules?: Yes
What previous experience have you had in role-playing?: I have played World of Warcraft and multiple minecraft RPG servers
How did you hear about the the Lord of the Craft?: Youtube
Link any applications that you have previously made for the server: None
Have you posted this application on the Minecraft Forum? If not, then please do so (link above): Yes
Have you read the Elven lore, and shall you ensure you make use of it and follow it in your biography?: Yes
Definitions In your own words define the following terms. Do not take any definitions from elsewhere!:
Role-playing: Acting as if you are a particular fictional character.
Meta-gaming: Knowing certain strategical advantages that your character should not know, but the controller is aware of.
Power-emoting: When a player pvp's and the target has no chance of changing  the outcome "Fred was killed by Bob" compared to "Bob tried to shoot Fred"



In-Character Information: Complete the following biography on your character:
Full Name: Guldurdor
Current Age: 217
Sub-race (if any): Wood Elf
Past / History (include childhood, major-events, etc. 2+ paragraphs long): When I was born into the world, I was born into an Ork dungeon alongside my mother and dead father. It wasn't long until an Ork killed my mother and decided it would eat me. I sat there defenseless waiting for my miserable life to end when all of a sudden elves came, they killed that diabolical Ork and brought me, the only survivor, back to kingdom.
                  I was raised by a family of wheat farmers that treated me like their own son. I felt like I had a home and was happy for a short period of time until Orks killed them to. Then I snapped. Now I travel the lands as a self-employed law keeper killing all Orks who wish to do harm to others. Life is hard, but I live on because I know I have helped people, and will continue to help the defenseless.
Ambitions for the Future: To rid the world of all players wishing to do harm.
Personality: Loyal and rough
Skills: I can fire my arrows before you even see whats coming.
Appearance (this must include an in-game screenshot of your skin):


Any other details you wish to share about your character: None
Open-Response-Questions Each question in this section must be answered with a minimum of one paragraph which must describe the event in full. Please be as descriptive as possible and do not break character or lore at any point. ____ 1.

As you walk through the deep forests you hear the sound of whispering and snickering. Upon inspection you realize that a group of older elves are mocking a small elven child.
How do you react? Answer:
I walk up to the elves and ask them to stop. If they do not comply I will get an elf official to break up the bullying. If both of these tactics do not work I will leave and not create a larger problem then there already is. This problem is one for me to help with, not aggravate.

2. Whilst wandering through the Elven forests you come across a frail old man with a walking stick. He collapses in front of you, falling to the ground with a sharp thud. Out of his pocket falls a small pouch of gold coins, which hits the ground and splits open spreading coins across the pathway. The man lies there, defenseless - what do you do? Answer:
I would recover the gold for the man and carry him, no matter his weight back to his home. To rob the defenseless man would be an act of evil. It would kill me on the inside, because under that old exterior is baby me, defenseless and weak to the crazed Orks. Although I do not rob I wouldn't say no to charity if he offered it to me for my services.

3. Whilst traversing the Elven Woodlands, you come across a small clearing in which a colored carriage sits. A trader stands outside of it and calls you over, telling you of his wares. He points out that his carriage sells just about everything, and that he's willing for you to haggle for a price. What does your character do? (Please include:- item, haggling for prices and the discussion involved). Answer:
When I approach the salesman he offers me an enchanted bow, and says its user has the powers of fire. He says he would like $1000 for this weapon of greatness. I say no on account that this bow may be like any other Elf carried weapon. So, he says, "I'll show you its power." "The bow shot arrows of flames like no other, it was so beautiful, but I only offered him 700." The trader said, "no I would like 1100!" Respectfully I said," 900 no more, no less, do we have a deal?" The trader agreed to the offer and the deal was struck.

[cruzazul 2815]

 

Unfortunately your application has been denied. Below are suggestions I have listed that you should implement into your application before reapplying.

 

I'd like to see you implement more lore into your biography. You don't really state any city names or events that show me that you have thoroughly read through the lore and used what you learned in the application.

 

Having your parents killed by orcs is very cliche. It is one of the most used biographies we see here. I am not saying you have to change it but it would give your character a little more originality if you did.

 

Describe your character in more detail. With what you have said I do not really get a good picture of how he looks, thinks, and acts. Add onto that and explain even the minor details. They can help a lot when describing your character in general. Painting the reader a picture when listing the tenancies and personality as well as look of your character can be an enormous help when trying to understand what your character is.

 

I'd like to see you expand on all three of your ORQs. Add more dialogue and unique emotes throughout to give your character more of a unique feel. 

 

Please wait 24 hours from this denial post before reapplying. If you have any questions don't be afraid to send me a message.

 

[cruzazul 2815]

Moved to Denied Forum