AI Can't Generate This

[KeiaTypeBeat 3277]

I'm having some feelings and I'd like to work them out 

And I've found I do that best when I write them all down 

If I care enough to dress them up so they'll sound a little pretty,

If I can fool myself to think I may come up with something witty, 

Then perhaps I can figure out why my heart is wearing thin

Without getting so worked up I lose sight of my intention 

 

But sometimes, I'm too tired to rhyme.

And most of the time, I don't even care if I sound good. 

What matters more to me is that I feel seen

And I hardly ever feel seen

So to me, the next best thing is hoping I can make someone else feel seen when they read the words I have to bring

 

But sometimes, even if I'm happy, even if I'm safe at home 

Even if the sun shines tomorrow, and I retain my hope 

Even on the good days, when I don't feel so depressed 

 

I can feel alone 

 

Alone in my problems, my feelings, the truths that I have to share 

Alone in my perspective, my attitudes, and the lengths I go to care

Sometimes I feel so alone that life itself begins to seem

A little not worth it, even when happiness is so available to me 

 

And when I feel so alone, uniqueness becomes a burden

Knowing not a soul can be found who truly understands my burdens

And when I feel so alone, all I want is to just feel seen 

But truly, there is not a soul alive who knows what it is like to be me 

 

But in there lies the poetic twist 

No matter how profound the hurt, no matter how emotional the fit 

 

Being alone is still something everyone knows 

So even if I'm too tired to care about rhymes, flow, or the style of my prose 

 

In my burdens, there is still something to share

That could let someone know someone is out there 

Who feels quite alone too, and this someone still cares 

Enough to write something bad, and spill her words into the air 

 

And even if it's bad, my effort still holds truth 

And that is something AI can never do 

 

It can't care enough to feel anxious about what others might think 

It cannot care about the potential of hope that it may bring 

It cannot be too tired to give up on a rhyme scheme 

It cannot be human, and it cannot feel alone 

 

And without the misery of life, without the fear of looking good

Without the means to be afraid of being bad, and without the ability to be a soul 

Without having fear, anxiety, and every other thing that makes it hard to be a human

 

What is made with AI will never amount to anything more than a shallow, tasteless joke 

 

Because that's what you are, when you pretend to write of things you cannot experience 

 

If I am writing of despair of being rich, then I am writing a joke 

If I am writing of a love of violence, then there must be satire baked into the prose 

 

If you pretend to know so well something you are utterly ignorant 

 

If you pretend to want to save a people you have an interest against

 

Then your speeches are lies and your quotes are jokes 

 

And only when you use AI, you do all this and more

 

With just a few keystrokes

 

And even in this post, you can see how I've lost sight of the plot. 

 

First I'm alone, and now I moan about AI woes? 

 

Well, I don't care, and I think that's fine. 

 

I don't even care enough to organize the lines.

 

Because even if I don't make sense, and nothing about this makes sense,

 

The way it fails to makes sense is still human, not produced by a rock designed to mimic humans

 

Tl;dr I felt better after writing this, and I don't think you can get that relief when you resort to AI. 

Spoiler

And yes, this did make me feel better.

 

And y'know, I don't think you can get this sense of relief no matter how well or reasonably you use AI

 

And you know? I don't think AI can even productively make up for limitations, either.

 

If I had a button to summon a robot to read Pokemon Blue to me when I was 3, I wouldn't have been so excited to learn to read well enough to make out what I was doing. 

 

Maybe that simple ease of access, that tiny little use, which sounds so reasonable, would have went on to stop me from developing the primary skill I use the most as a survivor to cope with my trauma, and the primary skill I use in my professional life as an advocate, and the primary skill I use in hobbies and activities I do in my free time that make me so happy. 

 

Who would I even be, if AI was around when I was little?

 

Tl;dr using AI because you're bad at something only stops you from getting better at it. That experience is a journey that can bring fulfilment to the soul. 

Spoiler

And, truthfully, I think using AI to make up for a lack of skill is even worse than just being lazy and not trying. Cuz you're making it everyone's problem to see. 

 

When we do things we have little practice or experience with, we are probably going to be bad at those things. 

 

I still have the very first story I wrote, somewhere. I couldn't have been older than four or five. 

 

I wrote a story about a headless horseman, and it was so bad, I could not explain to you right now what it was about. It was not even legible. 

 

But I do remember vividly how excited I was to write it, and how happy I was to be able to say "mama, look I wode this!"

 

I didn't quite even know I could have been bad at writing it, that I would look back on it and struggle to know if I could even write the alphabet yet. 

 

I don't even think I'm a very good poet. I care a lot more about conveying my message or my feelings, in hopes someone can feel seen in it. 

 

And if feeling seen helps relieve their hurt, or makes them cringe so profoundly, they feel less embarrassed to post something they worry might be cringy, or it makes even just one person say "hey, maybe it feels better to speak up for something I think people might judge me for caring about," then I can have fulfilment. 

 

And you can do all of those things without being good. In any attempt you can earnestly make, there is something someone will see. 

 

Even if you post the most utter, senseless, poorly composed block of text, it has the capacity to be relatable. Because everyone has done something everyone else saw and judged as being bad. 

 

Tl;dr I only wanted to write a poem about feeling lonely to vent and kill time at work, but thoughts flowed. 

Spoiler

It wasn't really my intention to say anything meaningful. I just started feeling lonely, and it really got to me, and during those times, I just write what I feel and it goes from there. 

 

And it eventually led to the AI stuff, and I guess my brain decided that we're going to voice some frustrations I otherwise feel pointless to share. 

 

And you know, I really do believe I'm not helping anyone, voicing these complaints. I don't think a single person will change their minds or be so moved from anything I have to say in a poem. I do wish I was so profound. 

 

But I'm still frustrated all the same, and call me a shitass hypocrite, I feel good when I vent, too. 

 

Tldr; You're not causing evil when you use AI on LOTC and don't even try. But it's bad enough behavior worth pitying. I think so, at least. 

Spoiler

I don't think anyone should be made to necessarily feel bad, or ashamed, or be bullied or hazed for using AI on a platform designed to be productive to creativity. 

 

I do think they should be made aware that they are robbing themselves of the experience and joy that is the journey to bettering a skill

 

I think they should know they are robbing from others the chance to learn from and relate to an honest attempt at creating something, even if it may be "bad."

 

In this, there is true pity to be found in using AI as a crutch. It stunts your humanity. It robs you of your potential. Ignoring the environmentalism, the ethics, how it affects others. It affects your ability to interact with the world the most. And it affects you profoundly. 

 

Tl;dr And yes, the long term effects of AI do have a profound impact on us

Spoiler

No, it is not profound to do something as little as using AI to narrate a game you struggle to read because you are three years old and no one will fault you for not knowing to read. 

 

But the domino effect that could have came from your attempt to fix the issue yourself, may have been the most profound decision you could have ever made. 

 

When you post genuinely, with effort, and passion, you lose the ability to say you've done nothing.

 

In our worst productions, we may say, "look at this mess I thought people would like. I am a fool for thinking I could succeed."

 

The most wise elders I have met, who have spent the time to hone their craft and be skilled, they look at us and say "I remember the first time I did ____. I was so scared, I was such a fool, I looked so stupid!

 

"And, I think I would give anything, to relive that first time." 

 

Tl;Dr I was actually trying to end it here, but, EVEN STILL, I think that's a crucial part of the writing experience not worth skipping out on. It's something you lose when you resort to AI: Not knowing when to stop writing. This is always my struggle when I have something to say. It's a struggle worth having, too, imo. 

• Seriously, the poetic irony of a person being so worried about looking unskilled that they use AI to make up for it is endless. It's very hard to genuinely believe people do this. It makes me sad to know they do. 

Spoiler

Usually I care more about what I post, and not looking frantic and belligerent. These days, lol. 

 

And I'm not sarcastic. I do feel embarrassed when I feel like I've spoken too much about something. 

 

But that's ultimately the point of this. 

 

I think writing has a lot of power. You can get lost in your thoughts. You can invent better ways of saying something if you think others might not like it. 

 

The process of writing, creating, speaking, all of these things that not even every human can have the privilege to enjoy from birth, is in and of itself insightful, learning, and it betters us. 

 

 

Even if I were to listen to myself when I think "actually, Keia, you know what, maybe tomorrow you will wake up and decide this post was not, in fact, it," and I choose not to hit submit, I wouldn't risk losing any of the insight and the positive feelings I got from just writing it all. 

 

And I think that's important enough to talk about; it's worth calling attention to. So I'll hit post anyways. 

 

Tl;Dr I felt lonely at work and started a poem about it, then an AI reference made me lose the plot. That made me think about how I wouldn't be able to lose the plot at all if I used AI to write this. 

 

Even after all this, my mad rambles speak to the depths of my humanity. An AI's mad rambles speak only to the depths of how much it fails to be human. 

 

If I'm making a point that a bad post gives people more to relate to than anything produced by AI... it would be unlike me to resist the temptation to take that philosophy and beat a horse dead with it.

 

I'll tl;dr the spoilers to provide a hint of clarity of the points I'm making. That much might also help express this isn't a mental health crashout, it's a bored at work crashout, if anything. Human things, all the same. 

[MailC3p 2403]

 

AI can, infact, not generate this 

[KeiaTypeBeat 3277]

Just now, MailC3p said:

The game

 

She really decided to post this!

[Ardory 2978]

Ma’am… This is a Wendy’s…

 

Spoiler

I love string of consciousness poems.

 

[Turbo_Dog 3567]

@Grok generate this 

[Random 1690]

[KeiaTypeBeat 3277]

2 hours ago, Random said: