The Destruction of the Self

[Balthasar 2093]

Spoiler

The text below can only be found in Tor-Praeth

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THE DESTRUCTION OF THE SELF

Authored by Arpad

 

 

When we are given life. We are without the self. We do not recall our birth, it is only after we grow in years, learn, accumulate thoughts and emotions. It is only then that we develop ourselves and our psyche. These are necessary steps in the cycle of life. We are all beholden to these rules, no matter race or species. Even the sheep grows, learns and accumulates. It develops an ego. Naturally this psyche is not comparable to that of a descendant. In the same way that descendant psyche’s are not the same as those of the venerable Nephilim.

 

Seekers of Azdromoth enter the same process, they are reborn into a society of dragons, fire and ash. It is new to them, it is alien. And so in the same manner, the Seekers grow, learn and accumulate thoughts and emotions. They are all different and unique, no matter how miniscule they may be. A seeker’s mentor varies, but the process is the same. Seeker’s develop their ego. It is once the Seeker has proven themselves worthy of recognition, of a developed ego that they are marked. They are accepted into the fold, granted a semblance of belonging.

 

Never does the mind cease to develop. Some may levy questions against the mind, questions I have oft asked myself. Is the mind and soul the same? Are they intertwined or are they wholly separate? Verily it is a difficult thing to concretely answer. The An-Gho writes that God is everything, thus we living, breathing and developing beings are divine too. Yet when we die, we do not become Gods. We are trapped in a prison of souls. I digress, this is not the purpose of this text - It is my firm belief that the mind and soul are intertwined. This physical being that we are, is merely to experience this plane of existence, once this experience is deemed complete we are moved to another one. The true self or soul is immortal, there is no end to it and changes in nature.

 

The mind through countless developments throughout our lives is what uses logic and reason to arrive at insight or conclusions about people, events, and life. Whereas the soul is the complexity of all our knowing and believing. It is the representation of our true inner self. It is the observer and the source. The mind is the tool of the soul. The mind creates your thoughts and logic, but it can unfortunately come to dominate the self. Through a process of enlightenment Asioth will be achieved and we will master the mind and the self will dominate.

 

It is through this lifelong experience of achieving Asioth, that we learn, become and some will be blessed with rebirth. Although all will not achieve this state, it is the end goal of our experience. Once I have proven myself to the venerable Nephilim and the father, the Firstborn. I dream to undertake the trials to be reborn, but first I must annihilate myself. Break down the mind and recognize my unity with the world, God and all that is.

 

How are we to undertake the final trials and be reborn, If our ego is unchecked? The disunity of our reborn nature. Destroy yourself and you will become an instrument of Azdromoth. I invite you, be you Seeker or Herald to join me in your own annihilation:

 

You must relieve yourself of material and worldly problems; yet you must have goals in this life. Without the fire of ambition, you are nothing. 

 

You must see and understand your own weaknesses; you cannot destroy what you do not know. 

 

Do not live in the past or future, you must be in the moment, the now; see the wind, feel the rushing waters, the color of the night. As transient as this reality is, you must experience it.

 

The powerful is not he who conquers others, but he who conquers himself; strength over others is superficial and fleeting, to overcome one's flaws, weaknesses and insecurities is to master one’s soul.

[Jentos 6885]

"Salvation exists only in the space in which one cannot sin. And only the free one is beyond sin. Therefore, free will occurs only once one is beyond transgression." 

 

Burning words, echoed by the An-Gho in black halls.