WuDz buBhoZh reZipeE buUUk.

[herculean_wud 3662]

[!] Before you sits idle a large, larger than orthodox book, bound in leather with red lettering scrawled over its frontal exterior. You slowly open the book and glare at the blood-red wording of the initial recipe: 'Cacavuuk Roazt.' The olog whom the book belonged to was far too stupid to record his recipes himself, and instead had a goblin named Finkelkrantz inscribe the paper. To aid Wud in cooking, small pictures were intricately drawn next to each instruction! [!]

 

WuD'z bUbhoZh reZipeE buUUk

Cacavuuk Roazt

 

Spoiler

             <--- Uho'Zhikar, 15/01/2k16 - 15/01/2k16

InGrEEdieNtz (Igredients)

- Azh hed ub ah Fat-Kat. (The head of a Kha)

- Azh bubhozh poht ub kaktuz gren. (A large vat of cactus green)

 

- Azh unyun (An Onion)

 

- Azh luhmp ub buttah. (A lump of butter)

 

- Azh Karrut (A carrot)

 

- Blud ub kat (Blood of a Kha)

 

Mefud (Method)

Firzt, remuub fur ub kat hed. (Remove the fur from the Kha's head).

 

Nekzt, remuub peephaz ub kat. (Remove the eyes from the Kha's head)

 

Nuw, kut unyun in dub, agh playz a half ihntu eech peepa zoket. (Slice the onion into two, and place a half into each eye socket).

 

Cuuk buttah agh bluud togevah untyl buttah iz melt'ud. (Simmer the butter and blood together until the butter is melted).

 

Rub dah mikzture ihntu dah zkin ub dah kha hed. (Rub the mixture into the skin of the kha head).

 

Wedj Karrut butween teef ub kat, zidewaiz. (Wedge the carrot between the teeth of the kha horizontally).

 

Pud kaktuz gren ihn poht agh fyll pot wiv watur. (Put the cactus green in a pot and fill it with water).

 

Pud kat hed ihn zame pot. Den, put poht obah fiya. Cuuk uhntil hed am blak. (Put the head in the same pot and cook until black).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Toad ihn dah huule "Juzt lyk momo uzed tu mayk."

 

Spoiler

InGreEdiEntZ (Ingredients)

- Peppah (Pepper).

 

- Zalt, oar hii-twiggi flezh. (Salt, or a hunk of high elf flesh).

 

- Hayndful ub Toad Peephaz (A handful of toad eyes).

 

- Bukket ub Flowah (Bucket of flour).

 

- Udduh-ful ub Mylk (Udder-ful of milk).

 

- Hayndful ub Eggz (Handful of eggs).

 

Mefud (Method)

- Mayk ah tipikal battah wiv dah eggz, flowah agh mylk bi mikzin dem tugetha (Make a typical batter with the eggs, flour and milk by mixing them together).

 

-Tozz ihn dah Toad peephaz (Throw in the toad eyeballs).

 

- Tozz ihn ah pindch ub zalt, oar hii-twiggi flezh. (Toss in a pinch of salt, or high elf flesh).

 

-Ahdd dah peppah. (Add the pepper).

 

-Bayk ihn oban until gulden bruwn, oar charr'd, huwebeh latz preferz. (Bake in an oven until golden brown, or charred, however you prefer).

 

 

Buk

Spoiler

 

 

 

INgrEEdiaNtZ (Ingredients).

- Flowah (Flour).

- Mylk (Milk).

- Zalt, oar meet ub frezhli rayd'd fat-katz. (Zalt, or the meat of a freshly raided kha).

 

Mefud (Method)

- Plunk flowah agh mylk ihntu buuuuuuuubhozh wuuden bukket. Lyk, ah zkahin' bubhozh azh. (Plonk the flour and milk into a big wooden vat).

- Mikz w'iv latz feedt, mayk zure tu zkwazh id thruu latz tohz. (Mix with your feet, make sure to get it through your toes).

- Bayk ihn obahn 'til darhk bruwn. (Bake in an oven until dark brown).

- Playz eech loab ub Buk intu zun, agh wayt fur magotz agh muld tu lib ihn id. (Place each loaf of Buk into the open and wait for maggots and mold to grow, and inhabit the bread).

 

Zerv wiv urukizh grog.

 

Tohnayul Zuup

Spoiler

 

 

[Man of Respect 5471]

eath'lur eats the ingredients before he makes his own food after reading the book... sad eath'lur...

[herculean_wud 3662]

wud sheds a tear

[Ethan the epic 115]

Grokor'Lur attempts to make the dish but cuts his finger. "Skahiung pieuce uf zhiut."

[Bardmancer 942]

Nurena'Yar can't wait for more recipes, and eagerly awaits the next book.

 

[Angmarzku 1251]

Moved to the Archive. It shall be sorted into the appropriate category shortly.