Loathe the Spineless

[Boomzerang 515]

LOATHE THE SPINELESS

 

SWAMPGOTH DRÛTRAM’LAK had, until recently, been loitering in his home among the rolling hills of the Mokh-Uruki savannah, a small helping of Toalak sludge on the tip of his index. As it neared his tongue, a rat wrapped tightly in parchment approached him; the parchment itself detailed the Federation’s declaration of war against Vintas.

 

He retired to his office for hours - what he did inside is unknown, but what is known is that as he emerged, eyes bloodshot and speech slurred, he ordered the mass printing of a number of posters, which were soon plastered along the walls and posts of the Federation’s capital.

 

[A selection of a few of the SWAMPGOTH’S posters]

 

Content with the distribution of his re-education material, the SWAMPGOTH decided it best to declare his clan’s role in the Federation warmachine.

 

“These SPIRITLESS, SPINELESS toelickers are an insult to all that we know; Enrohk loathes them, for they are not warlike. Leyd loathes them, for they do not expand their borders and enslave their opposition. Kezt loathes them, for they show no bravery in the face of conflict.

“Most of all, brothers, we loathe them. We loathe them for the war-machine loathes them. We loathe them for they remain vassals of those who have slaughtered us innumerable times. We shall let them taste but a fraction of what we have been made drunk by for decades. Sharpen your spears, brothers. String your bows, and fletch your arrows, for soon, we march to war against the weak.

 

“Send word to the Targoth. We shall see these scum burn.”

 

And with that, he set off to his armory, to polish his armor and to plot his attack.

 

Frûm Ulmakhizishu

[Guzr 2050]

The Wargoth of Clan Raguk is pleased to hear of Drutram’s allegiance, delivering a Raguk salute! “ WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! “ 

[Ardory 2978]

Fizzard’Raguk picks up the poster “Mi swearz mi peepz deeze before,” he says as he scratches his head.

[pkdon 2045]

A newly initiated Lak would take his spear with a firm grip, inspired by the Swampgoth’s words. “Wid da myt uv da bub’hozh Laklul, wi zhall zmite deze pinkehz. Der blud zhall bi zpilt, agh dey zhall tazte our zpearz. PRAIZE LAKLUL!” He’d exclaim, running off towards the Klomp Pit and practising.

[Guest]

“So march da Laks.” The Targoth squeezed leather gloves behind his back, then doffed his peaked cap as the swamp warriors joined their allies of time immemorial on the field.

[Gopnik Is Poggers 121]

[!] Clog grabs a spear from his back and yells into air “PRAIZE LAKLUL UR LAT FLAT”

He went to practice killing

[Inferno_Ougi 1454]

Aki’Raguk clapped for his blue friends.