A Letter to Nikolai

[Nectorist 12869]

OOC: This letter is only known to Franz Nikolai Tuvyic IRP unless he chooses to share it.

 

To my Nephew, Nikolai,

 

I write to you now, nephew of mine, because I know that the chance shall not happen again should fortune finally favor me for the first time in my life. Battle shall be had soon with the Sedanites. Were I still a boy, my stomach would be turning in excitement and I would lie awake in bed, thinking of the glory I was to win the next day. Now, a similar feeling arises within me, but it lay on the hope that I am finally slain, my pitiful life ended. You have seen me, I hide it not, such words are no revelation, and I forbid you to think so.

 

All I seek is rest, nephew of mine, something I have been denied. All actions, be they evil or good, aim at this, I have learned. Rest, or peace as it may be called, is a luxury greater than coin after the plunder of a city, or water after a march through the desert. It is something that, should one live in a manner desiring to make something of themselves, shall only be had when they are old. Only the stupid, the weak, those without will, may life in a state of peace, or at least a state they believe to be peace, for they force themselves to be content with their lot in life and mistake their situation with one that is a fine end.

 

I have lost, nephew of mine. I sit here a man who has accomplished naught but lost it all, a man who failed to live a life of good. Your father, my brother, is dead: I will never laugh with him again. My wife is dead: I will never hear her voice again. My son is dead: my last chance to redeem myself, to make a man better than I, one worthy of righting my wrongs and fixing my mistakes, has faded from me. I have failed, my life is now one that is worthless, for there is no purpose left for me in this world. My time draws to a close, my days are numbered, so I will at least recoup what little honor I have left and be of service.

 

I hold no love for you, nephew of mine, but I did once for your father, my brother. The attack on Karosgrad sealed my fate as much as it did his. Without him, I sit here aimless, as if my right hand were cut off. As a last duty to him, for all that he had given me without return, I shall now instruct you. Heed my words well, and you will not suffer as I have- perhaps, even, if you are as remarkable as your father, my brother, you will attain something of merit, something akin to rest.

 

I) Do not dream. What dreams come to you shall be broken. Fear them, banish them, never follow them.

 

II) Serve your country well. Loyalty to the Empire will be rewarded. If you are to be Lord Woldzmir, it will be you who shoulders the legacy of our lineage and the weight of our family.

 

III) Do not let others choose your path for you. In my youth, I allowed my future to be decided for me, and all good that may have resided within me was taken unjustly. Had I been the knight I wished to be, perhaps there would be some merit in delaying my inevitable death.

 

IV) Prepare yourself for loss. Again, in my youth, I was a stupid and naïve boy, unready for any reality this world brought. Had I been ready to face even an ounce of what I have, then my inevitable death would not play in my mind as some cause for relief.

 

V) Know that the only satisfactory end in life is that of peace. Know what actions are best-suited to obtain this and what actions will only bring you hardship and strife. Should you be able to obtain peace in life, then it will have been one worth living.

 

I leave you with this. Even if fate throws its lot in against me, and I am alive after the coming battle, my words will be no different. My life ended many years ago; I survive on borrowed time alone.

 

From,

Your Uncle, Sigismund

 

@JoanOfArc

[Lhindir_ 3691]

Ostromir tweaks.

[JoanOfArc 4604]

Nikolai sat in the company of his sister and brothers as he received the letter from his uncle. His first thought was confusion; his second was concealment. Concealment of the dreadful thoughts that were lain bare to him by his melancholic uncle from his siblings. He hid the letter from his sister's sight and moved immediately to his room to pen a response. His guardian had always told him to return a letter for a letter, so the youth began to try to put down words. He tried in vain. No sentence could ever voice his thoughts, no words be penned to show his agonish. The anger and pain over his uncle's defeatist attitude drove him mad with frustration. Was not the elder to show gentleness to children? Were all eyes in the land of Dobrov filled misery in the shroud of a rational lens of the world? He murmured the first words that came out of his mouth,

 

"You tell me not to follow my dreams? Then I shall do so, Uncle Sigismund. But in return, I take your dreams. I will take your knighthood, your peace, your love,-- your title. I will be the perfected You and I will know the peace you never tried to obtain for yourself."

 

A letter was never sent to Sigismund, but on the eve of the battle, a prayer from his nephew to St. Michael asking for his protection over his uncle was sent into the heavens.

[Tigergiri 3073]

Elisabeth watched as a letter was handed to her brother; trying to peak over the thin edge of the paper was hard enough when Nikolai was sitting even harder when he rushed out the door without a thought in his mind. Ellie mood dampened the energy in the room was set. Since the wars and rebellion, everything was sorrowful...  She wondered if her family had been cursed.