Prime Pumpkin Time

[Little__Lady 339]

[!] A letter would go out to the members of the Alliance of the Four Brothers.

 

Hello, my name is Primrose.

 

A few days ago, I was taken hostage by the people with a big burning tree. I think they called it Northland or something. I wasn't too focused on names at the time, given the whole "being taken hostage" thing. Anyway, they came into the village a few days back while I was doddling about at home. A human man knocked on my door and very politely asked if they could take me hostage. I was very surprised at the politeness of it all. I even felt as though they wouldn't mind if I said no. However, I didn't have anything planned for the upcoming week, so I said yes. 

 

They bound my hands pretty loosely and put me on the back of this massive horse. I'm not fond of horses, given I'm the size of a small human child, and I'm pretty sure I would have died if I had fallen off. Good news, however, the Northlanders were very nice and made sure I did not fall off the back of the horse the whole trip. Speaking of the trip, I think they got lost at a few points. Every now and then, they would stop in the woods to get off their horses and argue about what the signs said, which is fair, in my opinion. The signs are very high up, and I cannot read them from the ground either. 

 

Eventually, we reached the capital of Northland, which was very cool. Big place, lots of stuff going on, where they unbound me, provided me with food and hot cocoa, and then began to write a ransom note to my village. Turns out they knew my people don't use money, which made it really odd that they took me and not literally any other person in Urguan. But nevertheless, they started talking about what they wanted from the village, and frankly, I zoned out. The cocoa was really good, and I focused on that rather than their talking. Eventually, they handed me a letter and told me to send it to a friend who would come pick me up. In case you don't know, halflings spend most of their time high, and while it's a great pastime, it does not make for the most reliable friends. So with no sober options left, I sent the letter to the one halfling I knew would at least read the letter, whether she was high or not, Ruth. 

 

Ruth, great lady that she is, did come to my rescue, but she would have to walk. And poor old Ruth had rickets a few years back and has been slow as a snail since, so I had a few days to wait. During that time, the Northlanders assigned a human man to watch me. He took me fishing and showed me around. He even showed me where they keep the bodies. FYI, it's in the burning tree. 

Eventually, Ruth showed up, and lo and behold, she had brought Big Pumpkin in exchange for my life. Big Pumpkin is the frog that had been eating my flower back home, so I wasn't too sad about having to trade him for my life. Unfortunately, the humans did not want Big Pumpkin the frog. They wanted a really big pumpkin, as in the food item. Honest mistake, but Ruth and Pumpkin had walked days to get there, and it felt unfair to ask her to go back, so I asked if we could see the king and see if he would accept the flower-eating frog instead. 

 

Great news, the King liked the frog. Hopefully, he will give Big Pumpkin a good home. Sadly, though, the Northland people apparently were really fond of halfling pumpkins, especially our pumpkin pie, and that's why he asked for it. Ruth smartly pointed out that if they wanted food from us, they could have just asked. But nevertheless, after a little more talking, it turns out the king would like us to set up a pumpkin patch in his kingdom and throw a pumpkin party. Ruth reminded the king that, on account of the whole war thing going on, our landlords, the dwarfs of Urguan, would probably not be okay with that. The king seemed very sad at this but thanked us for the frog and said he'd talk to us about the whole pumpkin party thing after the war. He let me go after that.

All in all, it was a very nice time being kidnapped and held hostage by the Northland people. Also, I think we could just end the war with pumpkins and pie. What do you think? 

[NotEvilAtAll 10906]

"Oh meh KNOX! I'm glad tha' yeh're okeh Primrose! Hopefully the whole bein'-kidnapped thing t'was less scary than the evil carrots in the field earlier" 

exclaims Isabelle Applebrook, another pumpkin-eater from Amberdell (not the frog-pumpkin kind)

[__Stal27 2126]

Haraldr stared at the frog, entirely mesmerized by the creature.

[Sonybut7 530]

Ulfric the Tavern Keeper, continued to make Hot Cocoa for his tavern.

[Qaz_The_Great 1394]

Kynric Ash recalls the poorly directed roads, scratching his beard at the signs and he references his own map.

 

    "Father above, those roads were impossible to navigate! I had to trek the mountain itself."

[lemonke 6014]

A Oyashiman remembers giving the Norland King a frog Plushie as a gift. Maybe, it was FATE for Harald to become the Frog King.

[Calise11 841]

The High Keeper documented this event along with her younger under study, Eden. The histories did not always need to speak of trials of War. 

[AnneOfTheDawn 5]

Anlusyne thinks back on the poor halfling she had to bound and mount on Kynric's horse, wondering if she was able to get home safe, or as safe as it could be

[Riot 743]

Dorin Starbreaker reads the letter for a few of his brothers before smiling and looking up and stating,

 

"Iffn teh "Northlandahs" want peace wit teh Urguani an 'er vassals. Ah, t'ink teh Urmos come tah urguan an' ask us. Ah doubt we say nah iffn teh leave teh people 'lone an leave teh war 'gainst urguan."

 

He would look around the room and hear his brothers agreeing with him.

 

Dorin would begin pondering trade routes to give the Norlanders some pumpkin pie or ways to get the halflings a shop in the capital of Norland. 

 

"Mahaps tis time tah plan ah trip."

[frant1c_xr 29]

Fenrick smirks at the memories of that trip. They did have to climb mountains themselves. Heck, he had to swim a waterfall one time. 

Nevertheless, it was a fun trip. 

He hopes the halfling they had taken hostage, Primrose, got home safely though. Too bad they weren't able to get a huge pumpkin this time, but in the future perhaps.

He focused his attention back on the road as he prompts Sleipnir towards Solgaard village.

[salamanderfantasy 1340]

For Ruth, the hundred and thirty-fourty-something year old, childhood rickets survivor, previous prisoner of war herself, and consumer of four pipeweed gummy before she even set off, the road trip from one end of the continent to the other was arduous. But we can all rest assured that Norland is not discriminatory, as they gave her an extra half a day to be fair about it. 

 

Spoiler

I will pay for any and all hobbit ransoms by walking a frog across the map in the future. this isnt an offer this is a threat.

 

[ArgentEra 459]

The grey furred musin looked over the copy of the letter dropped off in his tax box and chuckled. "Onleh the halflin's could get away with that. Ets good tae see that they had humor over the matter." He said, tucking it away into his pack. 

[ichigomaster98 966]

The Shogging King naps the Sun's sleep.