Not every role-play experience is intended to be pleasurable.
If I am playing Baldur's Gate 3 for instance, or Dark Souls 3, there is going to be a moment my character "dies" and respawns.
On LoTC, the gravity of consequence is often not applicable whatsoever. My friend Sam killed his enemies multiple times but they never perma killed, and then once they killed him he did - this is not a equal scale for consequence, some people PK and others do not.
A consequence of that freedom to keep a persona and not have to re-roll is that sometimes, you will die to competitive people in obscene and unfun ways. When I see the "Game Over" screen in mini-games, I get mad too. Except in this community for some reason, instead of calling hacks, people cry and bemoan the fact they have to face adversity whatsoever.
I advise the people who despise bandit rp so much to actual rp consequences and politely communicate with the people they're role-playing with. A lot of the time, if you show an openness for discussion and a willingness to negotiate consequences, other players will respond positively.
When both sides act uncharitably, as is characteristic of LoTCers who spend the majority of their own free time with their own proverbial foot in their mouth repeatedly shooting themselves over and over and making the game unfun for everybody, you cannot complain if your enemy does not extend you that charitability themselves.
TL;DR
It's a video game, you don't always die, soulbinds exist, and if you just chat with people and make the best of a bad situation, you're stoic and cool. If you complain about every little thing, sincerely from the bottom of my heart go **** yourself, you're a loser.