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About Porkgasm

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  1. Porkgasm

    [September Prince] The Merchant Eucalyptus

    Great Job coming up with these interesting items!
  2. Porkgasm


    A lumbering Half-Olog could be seen getting dragged back into curon by a host of Ursus warriors, bellowing in rage and and yelling out something that sounds like "Smush burdy menz!" It would take five hours, seven broken bones, nine bludgeons broken over his head, and finally an entire fattened cow before the Brute would settle down.
  3. Porkgasm

    The Real Problem with the Community

    I'm not sure what the continued actions or issues of the Orc community, or individuals in said community have to do with them getting a Nation tile. They are one of the main advertised races. They should get a tile. I'm not sure what's difficult to understand. I'm still new enough to remember what it's like being new and researching LOTC before I invested my time and efforts into the community. I read the forums. I did my research. I read what lore there is on the forums and wiki about things that interested me. I like Orcs. My first character was an Olog. I play a Half-Olog now, and I've been told I play it well. I keep myself apprised of Orc RP as much as I can, because I like the lore. I like the culture. But, I will be the first to tell you that they have/had issues that they need to/are working on. None of that changed the fact that, in my mind, they should be getting land for the next map. Why? Because they are a base race. They are advertised as such, and as much apart of LOTC History and Lore as anything. Now, I understand a HUGE chunk of LOTC's playerbase play humans. I get that, and I get one has to cater to the biggest chunk of the population. But, this is a Roleplay Server. It is advertised as a Roleplay Server. Part and parcel of the responsibility of being a Roleplay Server is making sure that Roleplay is available and being Supported by members of the Staff. I get the Staff are volunteering. I get that many people don't like the orcs, and might not want to deal with them. That's shameful, and an issue on it's own, but, still falls flat of my point of Orcs being a core advertised roleplay race, and as such, deserve a tile. I agree, the amount of Roleplayers in the Orc community are much smaller then I would like. The culture, IC and OOC, tends to attract goons. Goons, sadly, are not the best at RP. I don't know how many times I was in their VC and the goons there were literally chomping at the bit because they wanted to click something while the Orcs were doing RP. Regardless of the flaws, they should get their own tile. Because they are a main advertised race, they should get their own tile in order for new/future Roleplayers to find them, thus furthering and improving roleplay. They should get a tile because of the staff mistakes in regards to their Capitol being taken away from them via cheating, which I have read on numerous posts that the individual who did so actually admitted to doing. Yes, they lost their Capitol again after via RP, but regardless, a positive gesture from the staff towards the Orcish playerbase will be taken in a positive manner. No, Orcs are not the oppressed minorities of the RL 50's. But, they are oppressed. It's hard playing an Orc. I don't know how many times I get into RP and have to deal with the effects of being an orc, and it's stressful. Did some of them cause it? Absolutely friggen yes. Should it matter in regards to them getting a tile? No. I hope my post has made sense, I wrote it pretty late in the AM my time. TL;DR - Give the damn orcs a tile. You have nothing to lose.
  4. Porkgasm

    An Open Letter to Weak Wilhelm and the Curonites

    A Half-Ogre sits in a tavern, drinking some booze, when he hears news of Adria and it's latest insult against the place that he calls home. "Gud Klompz" he grumbles. He then lumbers off to prepare for war.
  5. Porkgasm

    [Your View] New Player Integration

    When I started playing a few months back, I was lucky enough to have players from the respective races I started as, Orcs and Halflings respectively, come along and help me get involved and invested in the communities there. That, to me, will always be part of the most important things that can help a new player. Coming into a new RP community can be a confusing, and at times overwhelming experience. Having a friendly face IG being able to welcome a newbie and show them the ropes was a great help and comfort. Perhaps having staff that can interact and show wandering souls around and answer questions as they explore could be a benefit?
  6. Porkgasm

    [Complete]Old Man's Giveaway/Trade

    Name Boniface the Bonehead ((Username)): Porkgasm Giveaway Item #1: Storm's Call, Hammer of the Thunderlord Giveaway Item #2: Endless Feast Giveaway Item #3: Bear Fur Cloak
  7. Porkgasm

    Curon Freedom Festival

    Numerous visitors to Curon would make mention of a lumbering half-olog pulling gate duty, the room filled with smoke and a spliff hanging from his mouth as he stares dully out at the world. "Cactuz Greenie bad? Huh. Woopz" - Boniface the Bonehead, upon being told that drugs are bad. He would then lumber off, continuing to smoke the substance.
  8. Porkgasm

    The Eternal College

    [[OOC]] IGN: Porkgasm Discord [Optional]: Bonehead#4321 [[IC]] Name: Qin-Xa Race: Hou-Zi Age: 16 School(s) and Certifications applying to: The Institute of Health, Associates. Magics known prior: None Are you interested in teaching, should you complete a degree?: Yes Do you accept the rules and regulations of the Eternal College and of Fi’halen?: Yes
  9. A lumbering Half-Olog regularly seen in Curon would begin to wonder why so many grapefruits would be laying on the ground. Unaware of any decrees, since he cannot read, he would thank GOD for his good fortune and snack away!
  10. Got a moment to check over my Hou-Zi app?

  11. Porkgasm

    A Pumpkins burns

    The battle was like nothing the small Bryophite had ever seen till this point. Titans roared, and fires blazed across once peaceful golden fields. The air seemed to almost shimmer with the magic being used..and above it all, the September Prince, the avatar of nature, the harvester of souls. The Bryophite felt sorrow for those who opposed them, as he always did. He tried to convince those who had ears to hear to submit. Such was his purpose, his chosen task in the service to the wrath of nature. The battle raged on, and the Bryophite began to feel the stirrings of doubt in his heart. The fools and wealkings had gathered in numbers he had never seen, a true horde against the forces of September. He gripped his sharpened shovel tighter, and shouted for his companions to press on. It would not matter. Nothing mattered but the will of September. The Bryophite had seen the Prince ruin all those who opposed him. The choice had been made. The Bryophite had sacrificed all once could on the altar of September. A humble life. Love. A future of peace. There was nothing left but to press on....press on. It was desperate now. Truly desperate. The Bryophite followed in the giant footsteps of his Prince, blood staining his Pumpkiny visage as green sap ran down freely from his many wounds. The fighting was closely packed now as the fools pressed into them, mighty magics and spirits and what seemed to be giant beasts the enemy themselves had summoned joining the battle. A beastman had told the Bryophite that they had seen the Pumpkin man light hemselves on fire, hurling themselves onto a a giant enemy frog in desperation, such was fury and wrath of the Bryophite. He did not remember, of course. The Boons of September ran through him, and fire would hold not purchase on his leafy fronds and wooden hide as long as the Prince willed. He pressed on. He had sacrificed too much. He would not stop...not now. Not now. The Bryophite climbed. The battle raged below, and the Bryophite knew he could do no more. He had rushed to save Lil Ebenezer, the youth..faith in September so young. He could not let the young Bryophite die in this horrid battlefield. The battle was too fierce, and he lost sight of the boy as they called for help, lying in the bloody fields. The Bryophite felt a sharp pain, and fell to the dirt, his Pumpkin gaze looking up at his would be murderer, only to see the Knight brought low, and the Bryophite saved by an ally. The Bryophite was too wounded, and knew he could do no more. So, he climbed. Climbed the September Prince itself, determined to regather his strength as he hurled rocks and shouted encouragement to his allies below. Determined to watch as the Prince brought the wrath of nature down upon those who resisted. The battle could still be won. The Prince could do it. The Prince could do anything. Everything. When the end came, it came suddenly, as all these things do. A seed of darkness. Black terror. Something so small...and yet, death. The Bryophite clung to the Prince, shouting curses at his enemies, urging his companions. Amidst the din of battle, and the rage of war, amidst the mighty voices of those greater beings who struggled, one might have even heard the small Bryophites words. "Do nah SHIRK! Do nah FALTER! Death inna name o' the SEPTEMBER PRINCE!". Still, death would not be denied, and the fools and weaklings unleashed death upon the Prince. When the seed of darkness struck, and it's blackness spread through the Prince, the Bryophite knew he had failed. His wooden hide and leafy fronds fell away, his body shifting back to the humble Halfling he had been, even as his prince died. Still, the Halfling held on. He held on even as the September Prince burst into flames. Pain. Agony. These were the thoughts that filled the Halflings mind as he fell. His flesh burned with the fires of September own soul. Failure...all was lost...all was lost. As darkness overcame him, he found his mind wandering. He remembered finding a child, lost and alone in Dunshire, and deciding then and there that he would try and raise them. No child should be left alone. He remembered bandaging another Halfling, the poor soul in tears, as he spoke encouraging words, that they should never give up on their dreams. He remembers a game of hide and seek in the Druid Grove with a Halfling woman he loved, and a peaceful night under the stars. He hoped they would be safe now. He hoped. He hoped. Not much can be said that has not already been said. The Prince fell, his body raging with fire as those who followed him fled, or decended into Maddness. Great heroes would make their name that day, and the world would breathe a collective sigh as the September Prince lay defeated. No one would notice the small, burned Halfling, pulling his way, inch by inch, across the fields as the battle concluded. The very earth lay ruined beneath him as they crawled, but crawled they did, as a worm in the summer rain. Onwards, towards an unknown future.
  12. Porkgasm

    The September Prince Eventline

    The Lore exists for the players/characters, for the RP, for the events. The characters/players do not exist for the Lore.
  13. Porkgasm

    The Firelands Campaign: Missive

    IGN: Porkgasm Character Name: Boniface the Bonehead Nation/Group Representing: Empire/Curon Are you a leader of this group (If Yes, please list your discord information below): No Cause for joining the Campaign: Helping others, Vengence for getting Yeeted. Previously Interacted RP (Malevolence - Firelands p3): Attack on Santiega