Starting Over Is Hard Work.

[Rethai 163]

Hey lotc. I wanted to make a post explaining my flaws and what I would like to see from the community. Over the past few months mostly I've gotten hate messages both IG and on skype. I've chosen not to report these things on my own will for whatever reason which doesn't matter. Every since I joined Lotc last March, I was labeled a toxic and an immature player. I feel the marjority of this was because of my first ban which happened on my third week where I was overly hostile in OOC chat and I no-RP killed an oren guard. I did this because I felt he was Meta and powergaming while cuting off my ears (I was a dark elf). I was a freshmen in high school then (Oh goodness.. those were not my times.) and I like most people were trying to find my place. Since that event, I have been labeled. Labled a toxic, horrible RPer, trolly person. After my 4 month ban, I came back and played on the Down low, RPing when I could but wasn't getting into to much trouble. As the year progressed and I made loads of friends who I thought were more comfy with me than actually were and that led to my 2nd ban.

 

  My second banned was for toxic behavior which in the long run wasn't a repeated Toxic behavior but rather a horrible thing to say to somebody. I told somebody to commit suicide, where I was promptly banned for what was supposed to be 1 year, but was let off with an early appeal after 6 months. This ban didn't help my case of being a good person what so ever. As I got back on the server on January 1st I was greeted with Welcome Backs and a few who wanted me out which is understandable.

 

  As my time throughout the first few months of 2015 went amazing, I had a problem with a few who were antagonizing me with almost a bait-tactic to try to get me to say something Toxic. As you know my temper can be short at times which I admit is not good and is something I've tried to work on. Though these people were banned it kept occurring and eventually I just let it go because I thought it was a hassle to try and report loads of people who were sending me these messages, not to mention most were on skype and at that time you couldn't ban report with the only evidence as a skype message.

 

   Three days ago I had an encounter with a name I will not disclose unless he/she would like me to and I with my short temper went off. We had little RP and I killed her, sentencing to death which I admit was mostly because I was pissed OOCly. My grandfather recently passed away and my grandmother isnt doing well, which is my reasoning from leaving a perfect streak on the server to an attitude that is less pleasant.

 

  I wanted to share the reasons which I have done the 3 things on here. I wanted to share them so you know why I did it and how I can prevent it next time. I've been banned a lot. Three times is three more than I expected. Though this is a situation that only I can fix, I want to ask a few things of you, the community.

 

   First, I would like to ask if you could make me feel more welcome. I know I am not good at this with some of you and when I return hopefully around May 18th I will do better at. Secondly, I would appreciate all of the hate messages to stop. If you have something mean to say learn from me. Dont say it. It never ends up good for you... trust me. I've missed so many Months of RP that is unbearable. Third, I ask for your support on things. I'm not asking you to +1 my application for a staff position, or a +1 on any idea I have but actually have supportive criticism. If you want to deny me on something, give actual reasoning and dont always refer to the "You've been banned so no" answer that I get from tons. Fourthly, Id very much like it if I didn't get PVP-defaulted for being AfricanGlasses. I've had people who hold grudges hunt me down and kill me... This hasn't happened a lot but I just wouldn't like it to continue.

 

   I appreciate you reading these things and I look forward to my return shortly. I know its hard to forgive and forget but thats not what I'm asking. I'm just simply asking for a chance to better myself. I simply havent cared for 1 month what people think about me or what I do... and I want to change that. Actually change that. :)

[Dougstalicious 721]

racist and a sexist; toxic to our community

[Skippy 2466]

I haven't seen you or your supposed "toxic behavior" since I recently came back to the server, but just as a tip it usually isn't a good idea to go on the server when you're emotional, like your close family passing away or something like that.

[Ragadorus 113]

I honestly dunno.  You were pretty cool, 'til one of my friends told me how you OOCly told him to take a bunch of our stuff and join you and your crew.  I haven't really interacted with you since, but I know that a lot of the people from the south don't like you, either. 

[Maletone Blazebeard (Aqua) 130]

Uh personally you seemed fine for a while..it's just you get a bit heated in arguments...Just try and realize it's not as big of a deal as you think it is. Seriously it never is. I personally wouldn't worry any more about the bans. What's done is done..It can't be fixed but you can try and be a better person. Heck man, I was banned. I regret it obviously and ever since I've been trying to help out as much as I can and be a better person because of it. Keep on tryin..some day you'll get to a point where you realize "Hey..Why am I even arguing about this?"

[TavernLich 324]

I have not seen you be toxic, really.

[ThumperJack 927]

I haven't ever talked with you, or rped with you much at all. But every post I've seen you make since you came back has been decent, not trolly, or even flaming. Whoever is sending you this hateful remarks should be ashamed of themselves. 

[Savoyard 263]

Disgusting behavior, honestly.

[ausbrig renegade 238]

tl;dr

[LatzMomo 2088]

Lol I can't read.

[lawnmowerman 3040]

Disgusting behavior, honestly.

 

Agreeing with _Sweetwater. Running around threatening to ddos people along with telling them to kill themselves is utterly disgusting. I've insulted and harassed and have got nothing but shitty reputation for it. I think your ban will do you some good and I hope you come back to our community with a fresh attitude like I intend doing on the 2nd of May.

[kingnothing 571]

you're okay.

[Ford 1996]

u aight

[KarmaDelta 969]

You called me names when I was helping people in Wandering Soul chat in September.

All because others and myself told you to stop messing with the new players.

 

Ever since then, I have seen you talk smack in OOC chat from time to time aswell.

[Acornlad 206]

 

You called me names when I was helping people in Wandering Soul chat in September.

All because others and myself told you to stop messing with the new players.

 

Ever since then, I have seen you talk smack in OOC chat from time to time aswell.

 

Yo, what movie is your signature from?