A March For War

[iTzShambo 135]

;-;  your hurting my feelings

You're*

[Hanrahan 2983]

(( OOC note: I love this this is amazing and beautifully goofy and fun. Good job, both sides. <3 ))

[Alan 1815]

 

 

And so the dwarves and their allies prepared to march, the clang of hammers shaping hot iron resonating within their forges, the sound of proud, drunken mothers saying farewell to their sons, and soon, the crashing of boots from the legion's march. Step after step, the echoes of the great march spread across the land, soon to be heard by all of Anthos. And yet, it spread further...

 

Long before the sound of stomping boots reverberated through every home in Anthos, the forces of a faraway land stirred. They could not explain how they knew of what was to come, or what threat they must face. Yet this force held a duty, an obligation which burnt hot through their hearts, to serve the threatened. And with only this information gnawing at their minds, they prepared what weapons they had, assembled their forces, and sailed to the distant place called Anthos.

 

The group landed just as the final preparations for war were completed. Soon, the Legions of Urguan would march to conquer the innocent village of the GM's. So the small group which had landed upon Anthos navigated the foreign terrain, somehow knowing where they must go in this unknown land. After days of traversing this new land, they finally arrived upon the peaceful village and its preparations for war. Among all those preparing, though, they were drawn to one. When they finally came upon him, they all took a knee, bowing their heads before the leader of their expedition addressed the one known as Rittsy.

 

 

"My Lord Rittsy, it is during this time of peril which our humble group has come to give you our aid. Our band only numbers nine in total, yet I can assure you we are a strong and hardy group. We are well read in the lore of this land, and can pinpoint it even in the most lengthy of texts. We know of every race, and all of their gifts and curses, and perhaps even the half-breeds who hold multiple."

 

"We come with applications which your forces can use to recruit an army, and are ready to accept them granted they do not break lore and know the difference between power-gaming and power-emoting. And we come armed with weapons, ready to deny the enemy scourge the right to harm our most humble overlords. And when the enemy is so foolish as to think they may plagiarize your great speeches of victory and conquest, we shall banish them, not only from this great village... no, we shall ban them from the entire realm of Anthos, for at least one month's time."

 

"It is with our unique skill-set that we come to you to pledge our aid, our loyalty, and our lives to protect you. All we ask is for food and shelter in preparation for this great battle. Together, we shall drive back the enemy and deny them! Oh yes, we shall deny them again and again and again! Whether it be the 24 hour rule, or the five apps per month rule, we shall crush them and force them out of this great land... all for you, our lord, Rittsy."

 

Though the group was small, the war cries that followed echoed throughout the dwarven mountains, causing a few moments of shock within the marching legion. And with this pause in the echo of  the march, it was then that the Application Team knew that the GM's would prevail.

 

[Stag 3230]

Though the group was small, the war cries that followed echoed throughout the dwarven mountains, causing a few moments of shock within the marching legion. And with this pause in the echo of  the march, it was then that the Application Team knew that the GM's would prevail.

 

I may be wrong on this but this is a completely  RP claim, the APP team has no RP standing. The GM's have the GM village and characters inside said village that can defend it, no other staff team has any physical RP presence as there team. You can help them on your characters of course but....... You cant claim your team to do it.

 

This does not mean I agree with the war claim one way or another but I just had throw that out there....

 

 

((He just wrote up a long RP post as to how they came about. RP reason = valid!))

[Floop Lightforge 8]

((This is Gonna be Good~))

[Aengoth 2890]

Upon hearing the news Aengoth only has one thing to say.

"Ballseh move... I loike it!"

[The Fact Core 511]

Somewhere the Hippie is singing with the Birds and only shakes his head.

 

((Cough* Facts *Cough*))

 

"This is a bad plan. You will fail."

"The likelihood of you dying violently within the next five minutes is eighty-seven point six one percent."

"This situation is hopeless."

 

"Whoever wins this battle is clearly superior, and will earn the allegiance of the Fact Sphere."

"The Fact Core is always right"

[Lita 677]

He just wrote up a long RP post as to how they came about. RP reason = valid!

(( ))

[lιoɴ 248]

Wulfric smiles as he imagines the village at his fingertips. The greed of the dwarves will only expand.

[Ever 2648]

Joshua Borj, resident merchant of the GM village, laughs until tears stream down his face.

 

"Dorfs! If war you want, war you get!" He fiddles with his new cap before retreating down to the tavern vault to count out all the minas he has earned throughout the festivals.

 

((If, more like when, you guys win, this is the land you should get:

 

The land outside of the outline belongs to no one. The village doesn't even use it so you shouldn't get it by default. Just how land claiming/regioning works. The circle should probably be extended to the water.

 

I also reserve the right to hire an army with the 90,000 minas my character earned through the past two festivals.))

[Lago 2572]

"Ye! March forth lads! Drive these 'GMs' back over t'e Fourth Wall!"

 

I also reserve the right to hire an army with the 90,000 minas my character earned through the past two festivals.

After adjusting that amount for spawned items and use of GM powers, which reduces the sum to 'Not Much'. :P

[Ever 2648]

"Ye! March forth lads! Drive these 'GMs' back over t'e Fourth Wall!"

 

 

After adjusting that amount for spawned items and use of GM powers, which reduces the sum to 'Not Much'. :P

 

Oh c'mon. Let me have some fun, eh? :P 100 v 5 fights aren't fun! Plus I've had people telling me to put the money back into the economy for ages. 

 

You're just lucky I'm not going through with my 'giant craftbook arrow launcher of death' plan!

[Ford 1996]

Archibald sheds a tear for the dwarves.

 

[Valdis 38]

welp i'm glad i'm blind so i cant join the fight xD

[Lago 2572]

100 v 5 fights aren't fun!

That's what GM Aboose is for. :P

A lone figure strides up to the gates of Kal'Azgoth, a small cart following behind him. Two dwarves step to bar his way. He lowers his hood, and says to them "Got lore for that air?"

The two dwarven guards look at him in confusion, then discover they're asphixiating.

 

The figure strides down the hall of Kal'Azgoth, various completely innocent and harmless items shrivelling into Non-Lore-Approvedness as he passes. He walks up to a throne and bows before Grand King, ettiquette must be obeyed, after all.

 

"Grand King Thorin Grandaxe, you find yourself at war with creatures from beyond the Fourth Wall."

"Wuzza fourth wall?"

The figure points at the inside of the computer screen.

 

"Um, currently unnamed figure, that's a pillar," says the Grand King.

 

"You cannot see it for it is not part of your world, any more than you can see the veil to the Void from which magic comes. It is the barrier to the realm of OOC."

 

Thorin calls his guards over to arrest the figure. What happens next is far too edgy to describe, but the guards are gone, Thorin's jaw has dropped to several floors below and the figure is surrounded by 500 dead butterflies and a very much alive kitten.

 

"T'e 'ell did yer just do?"

"I used the Powers of OOC. With them I can break all physical laws. Do you remember August Flay? Karl Frostbeard? Mirtok DeNurem?"

"They're all dead guys."

"But first they were suddenly vanished guys, until the universe explained away their disappearances with deaths. OOC bleeds into our world all the time. It grants people superhuman "anime" abilities and then makes people stand still during fights while OOC bickers with itself. It makes orc heads fill with puppies and kittens when they try to fight in the Cloud Temple. Wait, no, I've fixed that last one, haven't I? Paxdire Aura or something, although I swear that was only Asulon...

Anyway, back on track, these 'GMs' come from across the Fourth Wall. They have the full power of OOC, as I do, although to a much greater extent. They defy all the physical forces of the universe. You and I know that there is no carbarum in the world and Iron Golems are impossible, yet their vault is full of carbarum blocks and guarded by iron golems. Invade them directly and your men will die under a hailstorm of chickens."

"So what do we duh?"

"How you fight them is simple. You make them..."

LORE COMPLIANT!

 

Grand King Thorin Grandaxe stares up at the rainbow text that has appeared above him, shuddering in horror at the soul-destructive power of Comic Sans. He turns to the figure, considers his words carefully, and then says:

 

"What t'e fek are yer on about?"

 

"It's quite simple. Destroy all the GM houses and signs and the rollercoaster (But not the graveyard! The graveyard's awesome!), all signs with "GM" on them, everything that proves the village exists in OOC. Then the village will return IC, that is to say, back into your world, and the GMs will return to the OOC realm. All that will be left is a tavern with anonmalous economic output. Then you all get drunk in the tavern and go home.

If you try to attack the village like you would an orc settlement, then you will be blown to pieces."

 

Thorin is quiet for a moment. Then he says, "How do ye know all of this?"

The figure upends the cart, and a few flowerpots and the head of Cakeman tumble onto the floor.

 

"Because I'm from over the Fourth Wall too."

The figure freezes for a moment, then the words "Lagomorphia has logged out" are plastered unseen across Thorin's vision.