And There Is Nothing More I Can Do [PK]

[EmiliainWonderland 2309]

Maybe it was temporary, Amie thought the first time she experienced loss. Surely there were better things to come, so it was pointless to give up just yet.

 

The woman's first memories revolved around family, her uncle the baron Olivier, who treated her like his own. Her cousins, Titus and Tiberius who were like her brothers. They all wanted the best for her, but she was reckless in life and in love.

 

It was before the second social season when Amie met a man named Valent de Rosius. He was clever, intelligent, charismatic, and Amie was intrigued immediately. She couldn't understand why a man so charming wanted someone like her, the niece of a Baron and hardly anyone of note. 

 

Amie pined for him, not for love, not for friendship, but for ambition. She did not love Valent de Rosius, not even during their wedding vows.

 

She married him because within him she saw a future that could be brilliant. He was well liked, trusted, a man of power and Amie desired that power more than anything. 

 

"I do not love you." He said to her, Amie could only smile at her husband though perhaps the words hurt her more than she had expected. 

 

And she was not happy with him, not even a little.

 

Her true happiness came when she met an unlikely friend, Vladrick var Ruthern.

 

A little rough around the edges for her, certainly no one she'd ever consider to marry, not when she had the chance to use her marriage as a pedestal to rise in the Ministry of Justice. She was already a solicitor, rising in ranks faster than she could keep up.

 

One night, Amie invited Vladrick over for drinks. As friends. Though something changed, whether the drinks or the company, Amie realized she could certainly fall for the Ruthern and fall she did.

 

Valent was absent, unloving, uncaring, cruel and bitter and Amie returned that attitude right back. It wasn't something she enjoyed by any means, so when Vladrick showed her kindness she couldn't help but be smitten. It's how she ended up with her first son, Rhys. 

 

"I have to tell the Pontiff the truth, I have to." Amie grumbled, fretting over the child growing inside of her.

 

And she cannot remember who it was who told her to lie, maybe it was her idea. She came before the Pontiff with a frown, eyes distraught and wild.

 

"He abuses me, he cheats on me, you must get me out of this." When Amie knew all along it was her who cheated.

 

And then there was Anton (an unlikely friend), and Duncan, and Sir Charles, and James Madron, and Ernest and oh Amie couldn't remember anymore, but they mattered to her. They mattered so much she couldn't let her life amount to nothing staying with Valent. 

 

And she was promoted, several times. As far as Attorney-General.

 

She had loved, she had lost. 

 

She married the man she knew she'd love for the rest of her life and everything was wonderful, they had children. Many children. Rhys, Isabella, Valentina and Valeria. Children she ought to be proud of. Though a weight hung over her with the loss of her unborn child.

 

The day the MoJ caught fire. Amie fought and fought to help free people from the rubble and she yelled and told them to stop pushing while she pulled, but it was useless. They pushed inwards and she was covered in rubble, barricades. The barricades crushed her and she lost a child. 

 

Amie recovered, eventually. It took time, but she recovered, and she thought that loss would be her worst.

 

Then it was the man who saved her life in that building, he went mad and tried to kill people and Amie had to hear how he saved her life but lost his. Then it was Ernest, who died in the line of duty, then it was Anton who went missing and never returned. It was all of them, one after another after another until Amie couldn't fathom being so happy and healthy. 

 

And then she wasn't. Amie was sick, locked away in the Ruthern estate when she heard the worst news of all. Her husband had passed. Years of marriage, loving, wonderful, passionate marriage and it was over in a split second. 

 

"Say it isn't true." Amie croaked.

 

"Please say they were wrong." The woman could hardly move now, she couldn't fight how much she wanted to succumb but there was still... there was still her friends. Duncan, Anna Mariya, her children... 

 

So she tried to hang out, she tried so desperately to stay for the ones she loved despite not being a good mother, she would've loved to be a good mother but she couldn't fight the restlessness, the sickness. 

 

Then Isabella. 

 

Perhaps the one she regretted the most.

 

"I'm sorry Bella." She weeped.  "I should've done more." 

 

No longer in the Ruthern estate, which had burned down sometime ago with the Civil War, Amie looked out her window and sobbed. Then she saw it, that bright flash of hope. Her out.

 

She was several stories above ground, a good landing could do it. End the pain, the misery.

 

She could be free.

 

She left no letters behind, except one, for everyone.

"To anyone whom it may concern, 

 

I wasn't the woman I wanted to be, I loved, I lost, and I gave it my all but I wasn't a good mother like I strived to be. I'm sorry to the children who will survive me. I'm sorry to my friends who will miss me. I'm sorry to everyone who deserved more than what I gave them, but I'm going to be with the one man I loved more than anyone now. Vladrick." And with this, Amie dropped the pen, leaned out the window, and dived. 

 

The last graceful thing the sickly woman could ever do. 

 

And it was over, at last. 

 

 

 

Spoiler

I didn't want to really format it. You'll read it if it concerns you.

Special thanks to the MoJ! You know who you are! 

Thank you to the d'Azor players, Anna Mariya, etc. All the players who played Amies friends you made it worth while playing her.

 

Thanks to CharmingCavalier for being a friend to Amie as well since their friendship was relatively short lived, it was still fun and you helped her explore her passion for art..

 

And my biggest thanks to @PapaCalientefor playing Amie's husband for soooo many years and to the players of my children @MapleSunflower and the others because your forum names won't show up and I don't know them by heart. Even though we hardly rped as mother and children, I enjoyed all the times I've interacted with you guys and your other characters. Much love to you guys!

 

@valecuThanks for playing Valent, you really helped form Amie as a character and gave her purpose to be who she was until the very end of playing her.

 

And with that I successfully outlived all the players who told me Amie wouldn't :) Except you @sergisalayou stubborn old man. 

 

[valecu 2128]

Valent frowns as he gazes the passing of his first wife. "I was already stressed from all the work, and you added onto this stressed resulting in my depression and sickness. May GOD judge you righteously." He uttered to himself and his friends from the Seven Skies.
 

Spoiler

It was fun playing your husband for short time :3

 

[Maevlin 724]

Anna Mariya stopped when she received the notice. She remembers meeting Aime ages ago, both young and full of hope, and now they were old and tired. All she could muster for one of her friends since she left her home was "I hope to see you soon my friend, we have much to talk about and we both need a wine night.." Anna didn't realize she was crying, but she did pray for her friend.

[sergisala 3451]

 

"See you later, friend." a man muttered, before lighting a candle and taking a seat in his private chambers.

 

Immediately after, silence was made in the room.

 

The man had true gray hair, gray as smoke. His eyes were dark and distant, and he moved with the subtle certainty that comes from knowing many things.

 

If there had been music… but no, of course there was no music. In fact there were none of these things, and so the silence remained.

 

The silence was deep and wide as autumn’s ending.

 

It was heavy as a great river-smooth stone.

 

It was the patient, cut-flower sound of a man who is waiting to die.

[annabanana1014 2084]

Valentina vas Ruthern would of let her tears fall from her face as she sat by the beehives of Balian. She lost her Papej and now her Mamej… shall they meet soon enough.

[MapleSunflower 1889]

Somewhere within the Seven-Skies, a raven-haired woman watched her mother below. 
 

She had never been angry about her mother. Concern always filled her for her mother’s condition.
 

Perhaps it was her greatest regret she couldn’t seen her mother one last time.