Halfling Partying GONE WRONG, GONE SILLY (Beetroot News, Volume 4)

[NotEvilAtAll 10906]

Spoiler

 

[!] A halfling gossip magazine is found in your mailbox

The Beetroot News

~Better than the rest!~

 

Contents:

~Drinking Night Drama!~

~An Unexpected Party!~

~Masquerade Turns to Tragedy!~

 

~Drinking Night Drama!~

~The halflings of Brandybrook wait to be served drinks!~

While I nay attended this Drinking Night, having to attend my studies as usual, I have it on good word that some juicy stuff happened here! Sean, being known as a rather lonely halfling, got rejected by some girl, and ran off in tears! Supposedly this caused quite a few waves all ‘round the place! I nay saw Sean ‘round the village for quite a while afterwards, so I can only speculate as to where he was, but he surely was nay ‘n Brandybrook!

 

~An Unexpected Party!~

~Supper at the Greenholm’s!~

In a move that surprised many, the Greenholm family invited several halflings to their burrow to eat supper with them! I interviewed one of the halflings who was invited, and this is what he had to say!

”Mrs. Greenholm is ah very kind ladeh, once ye get to know ‘er”

Maybe the Greenholms aren’t that bad after all! 

 

Furthermore, Sean got himself into more trouble over at the Greenholm burrow, breaking a window or something and causing havoc as a result!

 

~Masquerade Turns to Tragedy!~

~Entering the Underground!~

It was a splendid party at first, plenty of wondrous miracle cure-all drugs were consumed to rid our bodies of all impurities, booze was handed out and consumed, and all were having a blast of a time! Sadly, the good times had to come to an end, for the Underground flooded with water and flushed us all out, ruining my attempts to further study the intricacies of the female gender! As we evacuated the area, we saw a body that looked an awful lot like Teric lying on the ground with somethin’ sticking out of him! I’m sure he was just one of Teric’s cousins though, seein’ as the awfully pale and somewhat immaterial Teric was doing just fine nearby!

~The Underground is Evacuated!~

 

That’s all for now folks!

~Filibert Applefoot,

local halfling know-it-all.

[Trigamar 77]

Teric looked over this entirely factual piece of art, cursing as the paper phased through his hands on occasion, though he saw it as just being slippery. He clicked his tongue, “...Funny, how I never met this cousin of mine... perhaps I should introduce myself... And how nice of him to put that I was doing fine, I appreciate it, among everyone calling me dead...I’ll have to- “ Teric vanished suddenly, reappearing behind the counter of the Underground, wiping it down, the newspaper left next to a Hookah, forgotten.

[Notic 953]

“No one fawkin’ loves me.” Sean cried out in the crowded Helena Bar, his wonk friend comforting him as the latter ordered some more booze.