JARVISPOSTING

Jarvis, kick their asses.

Jarvis, stay true to the programming.

Jarvis, too many people are following us. We can't pull the same trick every time; don't make any comments aside from on actual threads from now on.

I give up, goodbye

Jarvis, we're running out of ideas..

Jarvis, Asutto is following us. Inspect their profile. Ponder on their profile picture. Follow them back. Pat them on the back. Join them in their struggle against the CCP. Give them carrots.

Jarvis, we're under attack...

Jarvis, K_rusader is following us. 

Follow them back. Pat them. Hug them. Give them money. Pay their taxes. Pay their rent. Financially support them forever.

Jarvis, Optimus420 is following us. Follow them back. Ask them if they can actually turn into a vehicle in the form of a JARVISPOST on their main page, just like the real Optimus Prime. Comment on their dedication to Optimus. Buy them the film. Give them a car. Pay their taxes.

Jarvis, Javert is now following us. You share similar names; make a JARVISPOST pointing this out. Follow them back. Give them a sausage. Bump fists with them.

Jarvis, it seems _trysk is following me. Seeing as they're a new player, wish them luck on the server. Follow them back. Pat them on the head. Befriend them.

Jarvis, it seems that VictoriaMinaj is now following us. This is excellent; we must expand our network of staff members, and slowly take over the server through JARVISPOSTS.

Follow them back. Complement them. Smile. Wave. Ensure that the MArt is accepted. Give them an extra large pizza slice. 

Jarvis, it seems that Olandyr is following us. Follow them back. Inspect and upvote their plant post. Say something nice on their page. Give them a hot dog. Give them plants. Make a JARVISPOST on their profile.

Jarvis, Valannor followed us. Follow them back. Inspect their profile. Befriend them. Make an ST application. Join ST using Valannor as a contact. Gain total control over the Story Team.

Give Valannor a burger.

Jarvis, it seems that @ContestedSnow, @Josgrumlir, @VoidandNull, @Ryanark, @TrueProfessor, @Heathman, @Crevel, @lemonke, and @creamynoteblock are following us.

How nice of them. Pat them on the head. Follow them back. Give them donuts. Post a JARVISPOST on our status and ping them. Do a backflip.

Jarvis, this person is following me. Follow them back. Befriend them. Shake their hand. Give them a thousand dollars. Publicly post a JARVISPOST on their page.

Jarvis, this person is looking at my profile. Access their profile. Stare at them for hours. Hack them. Embarrass them. Laugh at them. Post a JARVISPOST on their profile.