Lord_of_losers

good lord top G

"I'll read this later - But the title is wrong. It's actually the Underdim, as decided last night."

aevos more like arsehole wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey oioioioioioi

I’ve done pretty much everything that I want to. Trying out a deity magic and the culture that comes with it at some point would be neat

[!] Though intended only for the chosen few who dared to dabble in prophetic arts and diving rods, there stood amongst them an additional soul whom had no business seeing what she saw. An outlier. A pariah only in the loosest sense of the word - for she was no prophetic seer, diviner, nor a practitioner of otherly arts... Nay, instead it was by chance, a strike of fated destiny made manifest that she saw what she saw. For the wizard sat upon the intersection of thrumming eldritch powers deep within the crust of the plane that most mortal life inhabited... Leylines. By sheer fate, they were made privy to the ill omened prophetic vision; struck dumb temporarily by its seizing and twisting grasp. Breath shook violently from her lungs. The wizardly octograms deep behind her irises flared with iridescent colours that rendered her blind. Temporarily. Her vision faded to a single pinprick as all went dark... Only to then awaken in the dark abyss choked by the stench of sulphur and blood. So followed the vision; a twisted and foul thing that clung to the senses - a foul thing that she could not by force rid herself of. In the material, of course, she sat bleeding harmless shades of glossy octarine that swirled from her shoulders in helical patterns, until such a time at last that she came back to her senses. Badum. Badum. Blackness receded and gave way to blinding light. She could feel the strained heartbeat within her chest as it slowly returned to its normal rhythm. Then, the tingling of her hands faded and left her with the new-again sensation of grass beneath their palms and fingertips as they started up into the sky for some time. "Woe to the bat; woe to those who hide in shadow - for if even they are not safe, what hope have we?"

cant be bothered to see if anyone posted this yet already

can i put them on my head under a hat and become better at cooking

how much crack do you reckon you could smoke before you pass out

High upon the mountain did one Wizardly woman sit as slow-swirling wisps of purple circled their form like a miniature vortex. Communing with all that was, and all that could be, they reached into the door of their mind and opened it to the great infinity. Surrounding them in the material world was incense of varying kinds that on their own would smell pleasant, but all together at once meant they were well harsh and shit. Nevertheless, they meditated on... Eyelids closed over red eyes. The scent of Lurinian wizard garden grown blueberry pack stained their breath with each slow exhale. They opened their mind to those that would listen - to all Wizards of Almaris - and sent forth their psychic message... This message would not come with the Wizardly Newspaper, no, it would come only to those truly understanding of Wizardry and its variety of hoshposh, poppycock and nonsense. To the true WIzards, who believed in the power of Tea Leaves, Chicken Bones, Octograms and even the rare few still who clung to the Omniscope. To those that still had the power to believe in magic. It came clearly, and projected itself with subtlety, whispering an undeniable 'truth'. "Our Shamanic friends have for the longest time, to no-one's surprise, openly hated our Voidal Magicks... But I have come to a realisation. In my search to find common ground, I have realised there is a single common entity that we may use to unite us. I have spoken with Shamans, and been told of ONE who might understand our ways. The Spirit of Magic... He of many corridors, whispered smokes and giver of visions. He who grants innovation and sparks wonder. He who lives in a pineapple under the sea, or a house in the winding expanse of the Spirit Realms. Let us, then, True Wizards of Almaris, come together on common ground and say that if we must choose a patron Spirit of Wizards, let it be HIM." "PRAISE BE TO WODONAZ. SPIRIT OF MAGIC AND CHANGER OF WAYS. WODONAZ IS REAL, AND HE IS MAGIC." The Wizard gave a long, drawn out exhale, and laid down upon the top of the mountain, and soon began to snore. THE MIGHTY WODONAZ - WODON

"I hate you Sarrion shut up shut up I want to make up wacky stuff so people think I'm SMART and COOL. Kidding. Magic should be magic!" The Wizard conjures a psychic storm within the Void nonetheless and sends it hurtling towards Sarrion's crystal orb or whatever he has in his house. It manifests as minor inconvenience, and causes Sarrion to lightly stub his toe the next time he's around it. In addition, he hears this exact message relayed in his head, alongside laughter from the attacking magician! She knew it was Sarrion, of course, because of his pipe smoke smell staining the wizard newspaper. Perhaps it wasn't actually Sarrion, and Sarrion just got dunked on for no reason.

To the piano-makers of Almaris, I am looking to request the creation of a small piano, no greater nor smaller than precisely one cubic metre. That is, for those that do not know, one metre in width, by one metre in length, by one metre in height. I recently lost mine in the battle for Amathea, where I translocated it above the bugs climbing the walls, and sent it hurtling atop their heads. It fell to the floor with a pling, a plang, a crash, a clong, a throng and a bang. The piano's actual musical capabilities do not have to be perfect, or particularly well-tuned, but it should make funny noises if used in offensive capacity. My budget for this piano is limited, so please offer only your cheapest solutions. Thank you! Signed, Artenin the Wizard.

weary face emoji.jpg

Super. *******. Based.

I kinda agree with this and think a more appropriate alternative would be to just give the limb Alter Position, if that’d be better - which if I recall is already a T3 spell. This whole topic was brought up recently actually and if you want to read it word search for “telekinetic” in the story team disc