This Week’s Title: Just Overthrow the Emperor Already

[Lady Whistle 61]

Spoiler

 

To my dearest readers:
 

One might have hoped that with the passage of time, our beloved Imperial crown would’ve shed the shackles of tyranny and embraced reason. Yet alas, here we are once again, greeted this week not with reform, but with the literary equivalent of a slap to the face: Lex Tiberi.
 

Yes, I refer to the newest lawbook so graciously bestowed upon us by His Imperial Highness and his ever-so-precious progeny. A text so vile, so fundamentally absurd, one must wonder whether it was drafted during a fever dream or a particularly cruel drinking game.
 

Among its many atrocities: the classification of entire races as lesser. An increase in taxes targeted at non-humans. An absurd tangle of regulations designed not to protect, but to control. Is this the future the Empire envisions? A fractured society built upon fear, hierarchy, and state-sponsored discrimination?
 

To this, I say: how dreadfully uninspired.
 

And while I am but a humble writer with no legion to command or sword to raise, I wield a far deadlier weapon than that, the truth. And here it is:
 

The Emperor is the most egocentric, self-absorbed man to ever walk the continent.

And frankly, I’ve met humbler liches.
 

One cannot help but snicker at the grandiose title "Emperor of Mankind"  a name fit not for a ruler, but a tyrant mid-delusion. If you must declare yourself emperor of everyone, perhaps it's time to ask why no one actually wants you to be.
 

So, my dear readers, if you've read the Lex Tiberi and felt a strange mixture of nausea and rage, know this:  you are not alone. Keep your eyes open, your pens sharp, and your voices louder than ever. History has never been kind to tyrants, and this one is no different.

 

Yours in eternal disobedience

Lady Whistle

Edited July 5, 2025 by Lady Whistle

[sam33497 7356]

Sir Sirius Mareno didn't bother fiddling with his carbarum blade. "Heheh, you and what army?"

[ScreamingDingo 20568]

“History has been kind to Tyrants - they have long and powerful reigns within their Empire. People do not raise flags, the sensibilities of the Sutican Mind should not infect the blessed minds of Braevos. We have been made to be separate, descendants are meant to stick with those of their forefathers and none others. Otherwise, the curses of the Betrayer would not be as purposeful. It is, fate.”

 

Reginald Percivial Napier the III, famed scholar of many stories of Orcish and Human unification shakes its head. The concept of popular uprisings are ones that have not been done against the oppressive, but only those that were seen to be darkspawn. It goes to slowly scrawl upon the missive in its office, using it as a framework for the Mina deductions he can get if his printing press is employed with orcish slave labour.

[Crevel 7557]

Spoiler

This is written by AI. Ignored.

 

[Pegleg_Bob 1107]

Spoiler

@Werew0lfI know this is you, don't try to hide it.

 

[Wonderland_Boy 1081]

Wtf

[yuiilindaos 158]

Spoiler

Entertainment?

 

[Tentoa 3160]

"An elf wrote this." Concluded an Jiro Hirano after reading the page.

[xo31 3979]

12 minutes ago, Crevel said:

Spoiler

This is written by AI. Ignored.

 

Spoiler

No it isn't you dumbass 😭

 

[Crevel 7557]

Just now, xo31 said:

  Reveal hidden contents

No it isn't you dumbass

 

 

Spoiler

It is. I saw it in a dream.

 

[Mescaffier 6197]

Helena, recently-fired Lord Justiciar, who had indeed written a great deal of the named laws, grimaced as she sipped on a non-alcholic piña colada (alcohol was suboptimal for healing brain injuries, she'd been told). "Were they really that draconian ..? It's the Empire of man, not the Empire of ... Malin ... eheh ..." she chuckled, shooting a weird & offputting smile to the figure beside her.

[Asutto 2452]

From the Baronetcy of Rethel, a young Enswerpian scholar by the name of Earnhardt mused over the tabloid. Mixed emotions coursed through his veins, but chief among them all, disgust. He, being no older than twelve, had read through the Lex Tiberi and thought them to be quite swell. After some time, he ventured to the living room to consult, no, lecture his dear sister, Aurelia, on his opinion. 

“Look, it’s really unbelievable — the lengths these elves are going to, trying to tear down our great Emperor’s laws. And let me tell you, these are beautiful laws. Some of the best laws ever written — people are saying that. Even Tony Numendil, who’s a very respected — very smart guy — he’s jealous. He’s saying, ‘Wow, how does your Emperor write laws like that?’
 

But the elves? Total disaster. They don’t like it. Not one bit. Even after the Emperor, very generous — maybe too generous, frankly — gave them citizenship under the same laws they trashed. Incredible. If it were up to me? I’d put them in a catapult — boom — right out of the country. Fast. Tremendous.”

Earnhardt concluded while narrating his opinion with his hands. 

[Werew0lf 24180]

Spoiler

 @Tide1fk you!

 

[Smmer 2441]

The empress would look at the page.”Dang me personally l wouldn’t let that slide.” 

[MrMojoMordor 2413]

"Typical twiggie - worries over their rightz inztead of Black Mojo being licensed."