Jump to content

monkeypoacher

Gold VIP
  • Posts

    5469
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Reputation

6989 Rep Farm Business Owner

About monkeypoacher

  • Rank
    Diamond Miner
  • Birthday 01/01/2018

Contact Methods

  • Minecraft Username
    MonkeyPoacher
  • Skype
    🍞

Profile Information

  • Location
    Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan
  • Interests
    🍞

Character Profile

  • Character Name
    Fatty Peach Dog
  • Character Race
    Kharajyr

Recent Profile Visitors

81827 profile views
  1. once i put a bunch of oblivion guard npcs in someone's fort and built a ladder during a raid and got banned for exactly the same term as someone who spent the past 2 years falsely accusing a guy of being a pedophile. feels good man
  2. From a pure marketing standpoint I cannot imagine advertising to the intersection of minecraft and d&d/fantasy roleplaying (both demos that skew younger and more likely to be LGBTQ+ accepting) and deciding to keep the gate for people who can tolerate simulated discrimination against gay characters. It doesn't make sense from the top down.
  3. >be me

    >wake up on feburary 4 2024

    >look at forums

    >see monkeypoacher requesting account deletion

    >worry.jpg

    >express thoughts of love

     

    >be me

    >wake up on feburary 12 2024

    >look at forums after long day of writing

    >see monkeypoacher continue to post

    >crackaddiction.gif

    1. Hunnic

      Hunnic

      Its the law of the lotcer, everytime a gamer makes a goodbye post, their activity grows tenfold.

    2. monkeypoacher

      monkeypoacher

      i got the shakes sorry

  4. TO THE ALSTION PRETENDER, KING OF AAUN (HUMILIATED BY ADRIA), DUKE OF VIENNE (CONQUERED BY ADRIA), COUNT OF WHITESPIRE (RAIDED WITH IMPUNITY BY ADRIANS), ET CETERA, ET CETERA, REPRESENTATIVE OF THE RABBLE OF ORENIAN RUMP STATES: Heed that we, the Adrian people, know the true purpose of your overtures, and know your true nature. You are a lamprey, fetid spawn of the lowest brackish pond, whose sucking mouthparts cling with vain hope and desperate ardor to the Hanseatic ox. Your substance is Canonist blood. Your edicts have no power, and your pathetic gyrations do not warrant the notice of my proud nephew. I treat with you now: Heed that our people have not seen the passage of one generation since your Court plotted to murder my brother, the Duke's father, and install a Montelliano traitor in violation of our laws and traditions. In defense of this pathetic and fruitless plot, your armies arrived in our city and were slaughtered. Your armies fought us on the fields outside Minitz, and were slaughtered. Your armies fought to defend the walls of their forlorn, rat-infested capital, and there, too, they were slaughtered. Be it that the turning of fortune's wheel sees you in Whitespire and us in a camp - if your last hope is to beg us for aid, your days will not be long. This rebellion may fail, but so will you. Your fickle, grasping assortment of self-styled knights and minor lordlings will desert you. Your covenanters will turn against you in jealous anger to seize the barren crofts and despoiled villages of the Midlands for themselves. And you, worm, will return to where you belong. If you would like to avert this fate, you have one course of action. Cede the lands to the west and north of Whitespire and accept our claim as the House of Sarkozic to the Kingdom of Oren. We will treat you as vassals more kindly than your predecessors treated us, and you will be at liberty to rule your irrelevant state as you see fit. Pay us homage, and we will forgive the many crimes you have committed against our people. Until then, writhe. Pavel Sarkozic
  5. "For the afflicted, the poor, the Law. For the prince and the prelate, our prayers." Pavel raised his quartz spectacles back over his eyes, shielding them from another reading of the obsequious missive.
  6. i was previously told to email [email protected] for this with my info but i see people posting here i am begging Admins on hands and knees: please save me from myself: it has been forever since i've actually logged on but i compulsively check the forums. this server brings me no joy please delete my account/content and ban my ign monkeypoacher and invasivecarp i would like to live a productive and charmed life free of fantasy roleplay
  7. Centralization would rob human roleplay of what makes it interesting; the squabbles between the different decentralized settlements/nations is most of the substance. A player dynmap is a good idea though! It seems simple enough to add in with a command that lets you hide yourself from the map, or maybe a slightly more difficult implementation has anonymized player icons or a heatmap.
  8. Having weathered the Third Covenant Poetry Offensive, Hadadrimmon Harrenid applies a salve for his paper cuts and sets to work with a broom to sweep up the remains of his plumes and a wet rag to daub up spilled ink. He avoids looking behind him, lamenting that he had smashed his writing desk in anger after reading Marius Lovetts's newest composition.
  9. It's a cool trope. The way it plays out in roleplay is exceptionally dumb, because everyone meta-knows that it is effective, and people are willing to suspend their disbelief about their character's own tolerance for getting their hand sliced open to get where they're going. It becomes less "painful reflection on how paranoid this fantasy world is" and more "they're making me walk through the metal detector AGAIN" The aurum "lines" outside gates made of pressure plates or gold blocks are repulsive. I can jump. I will roleplay stepping over it. A goblin will come and pry the gold leaf off the bricks. Come on, guys.
  10. These guys have been solo carrying the nations they vassalized under since Savoybileti. They made those horrible savannah islands on Almaris work, I don't think their choice of location is really going to slow them down. And since their release from their oaths of vassalage has already played out in character I don't think the number of existing realms is really relevant.
  11. Indirectly responding to a criticism in the OP of lore written "out of boredom" and not to satisfy some arbitrary measure of quality. I really hate it when people take a shit on other players' creativity, and I also hate it when catty personal drama is couched in euphemisms about "data" "activity" "metrics" and so on. I might just be a bitter ******* though.
  12. This is such a nice format. I don't really run events but I think it would be useful for just roleplaying your character too.
  13. The motivation behind everything here is boredom. You are not roleplaying in Minecraft because you have an obligation to, or because it is instrumentally productive, even if you tricked yourself into believing that. You are writing lore because it is satisfying and you are bored. Glad to see monkey men are back though
  14. Rousing from a waking dream to news of the "Duma," Pavel turned his chin up from his houppelande. His eyes light up in a way they had not in years before or since, and a fretful smile crossed his chapped lips. "Who has the lottery?" He croaked. "Oh- there's no time. Let me taste.. the Duma wine."
×
×
  • Create New...