Jump to content

fluffycop

Member
  • Posts

    45
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by fluffycop

  1. I’M GONNA KILL YOU 15th of the Deep Cold, SA 139 To the illiterate and armless king, I’m gonna kill you. P.S We of the esteemed Frostbeard Clan and Brawm’s PMC do not partake in slavery, we liberated all those elves out of the kindness of our hearts. They are free now. We are so benevolent, I’m sure if the tables were turned you would have burned us alive. Signed, John Mudd Signed, John Frostbeard
  2. CAPTURED VALE- ELVES FOR RANSOM 15th of the Deep Cold, SA 139 The brawny brawns and Frostbeard soldiers have made a new capture! A plentiful bounty of elves in the vale to be ransomed off! We can only guarantee their safety for a certain amount of time. The dogs are getting hungry and we did not bring any meat! Hurry! And you may save their damned souls! THE CLOCK IS TICKING! Our Discord for more fights, and to see the schedules! https://discord.gg/vGcHvNHPRb
  3. 10th of the Sun’s Smile, 139 SA By Decree Of: The Scholar, Gardalf Frostbeard ᛏᚬ ᚴᚬ ᛁᚢᛁᚾ ᚠᚢᚱᛏᚼᛁᚱ ᛒᛁᛁᚬᚾᛏ A SCIENTIFIC ANALYSIS OF NORLAND ᛏᚬ ᚴᚬ ᛁᚢᛁᚾ ᚠᚢᚱᛏᚼᛁᚱ ᛒᛁᛁᚬᚾᛏ To the forever-weak coward of Norland, It has recently been brought to my attention that the Norlanders have been parading a recent “victory” against Urguan. This came as a shock to myself and my Frostbeard brethren who were in fact celebrating our hard fought victory against the Norlanders in the midst of women and ale! Celebrating the terror and wrath brought down upon the norlanders, by Chris Frostbeard, who returned from the battle with countless heads and a mane stained crimson red! Perhaps, maybe, the fight was not as victorious as it had seemed to us and we had made a grievous error in our judgment? At once, the greatest Frostbeard thinkers were assembled and put to work solving this conundrum. After much headwork and problem solving involving complex formulas, the scholars came to the conclusion that the Frostbeards were indeed victorious, and the Norlanders were mistaken. Here is the mathematical theorem which led them to this conclusion: Nine Frostbeards faced off against 180 Norlanders. 150 Norlanders were slain (with ease). Five Frostbeards were martyred heroes. By using a complex operation only recently brought to the backwards backwaters of Norland, called “subtraction”, we may assess that the Norlanders had lost more than a hundred forty-five more men in a conflict where they had outnumbered us twenty to one! The same scholars, upon the completion of their analysis, then got to work unearthing the reasoning to Norland’s mysterious claims to victory. Our conclusions are as such: The incestuous queen is facing symptoms of grief - no doubt to these countless losses - the most prevalent of which we have labeled as ‘cope’. Most likely a symptom of their incessant inbreeding. We will be sending our clan doctor, John Frostbeard, to assess the situation behind Norland’s walls. We hope to come with a clear diagnosis in the coming stone week.
  4. 13th of Anbella’s Seed, SA 138 BY DECREE OF THE FROSTBEARD CLAN ᚴᚼᚱᚢᛘ ᚴᛅᛋᚾᚬᚴᛘᛅᚱ ᚴᛅᚢᛁᚱ ALL MY OPPOSITION LAY DEAD -= KHRUM KAZNOKMAR KAVIR =- ᚴᚼᚱᚢᛘ ᚴᛅᛋᚾᚬᚴᛘᛅᚱ ᚴᛅᚢᛁᚱ Our resident illustrator has compiled a “motion picture”. Please flip the pages in rapid succession to view the battle in lifelike detail! To the ever-damned craven of Norland, No longer do I write to you as an equal, for I have brought your cowardly kingdom to its knees. Had you not considered the grave insults you gave unto us? Surely you were mistaken to approach as if we were the idle crowds in your city. You cowardly cabal that hides in the Norlandic keep, we have shown you thrice our might, and thrice you have fallen. Before you was all the strength of Adria, your steel glittering in the sun, and yet you have fallen time and time again, You cowardly craven, come hither and fight, thrice have I slain your rallies and thrice have I not seen Hilda the heathen nor Balon the coward. Let us recall the events of today when the clarion call was heard in Urguan when the beardlings swarms rallied forth. I must surely be mistaken, but I recall a sighting of a dwarf resembling the Norlandic King, not only a coward but a midget as well? I will make sure this dwarf is to be slain on sight, as shortly upon his sighting did coincidentally you cravens prepare to hide. We of the dwarves hold our heads high, and indeed does the Frostbeard Clan not allow slights against our honor and pride. You craven inbreds, did you think we would give you an olive branch and allow your response of indifference? We have met and spoken with the true and proper king of your lands, Vangel, and he has shown us a clear map of your bloodline and family tree. Tell us Balon, why so do you marry your sister? You accursed varlet, come out from your little bunker and see the pitiful lament of your sister-queen! Rotten knave, no longer is the opportunity for diplomacy available to you mongrels. We were most surely mistaken in committing diplomacy with those who engage in inbreeding, a “veritable word-salad” as one had said, most clearly a sign of illiteracy and ignorance in reply to our warning to you worthless serfs. As well in return for the Dwarven spy relaying news of our rally to you wretched curs, I will have my own operatives do the same. As we speak, I have unleashed a squad of ten musin led by John “The Savant” to lurk through your sewers and destroy all your redstone linings, mechanical traps, and tear holes in your walls. It is well known those of incestuous lineage are not competent in means of architecture, I wish you good luck in fixing this. And in one final jest, Loathsome rogue, do I give you a final opportunity to come speak with me at my mansion. Do not take this lightly, you pitiful wretch, bring whatever means of worth you have left and I might just spare you.
  5. Name: Taz Frostbeard Age: 134 Race: Dwarf Nation: Urguan
  6. THE FIST OF GOD 15th of Tobias’ Bounty, 133 SA “Who is our enemy? Guide my hand and I shall strike” - Cardinal Jonathan seeking guidance from the Lord In the name of our most Holy Lord God, The unrighteous are struck down by ecclesiastical warriors of the unseen hand of the Messiah! The men of the Canons Regular are proud to record in the annals of the Before Time - while the Chosen remains yet unknown to the world - a bombastic victory over the cretinous aggressors of Minitz! To start, let us begin at the seeds of conflict. Good sir Theo, a brave and virtuous knight, was unceremoniously attacked by Minitzian barbarians whose motivations remain unknown. Surely the good Theo could not have been harming anyone, for he was speaking gayly with a new acquaintance! Nevertheless, with the aid of this acquaintance (evidence of his good nature), Sir Theo was able to escape unharmed from the rude assailants. Unsatiated with the lack of blood shed, the aggressors took it upon themselves to stalk the good lands of the Canons Regular to fulfill their dastardly desires. Many good men were frightened out of their stockings at the sight of the unruly band, but they remembered the Lord God’s words to their ancestor Exalted Horen: “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.”, and thus these humble men were able to find their courage. To this the men, in solemn unity, replied: “Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.” These righteous men now knew that the favor of the Lord was with them, and with the radiance of a thousand suns they assembled to dislodge the bloodthirsty raiding party. No corporeal entity could impede in the search for the Messiah. Our good heroes confronted the brigands - outnumbered and unarmed - yet they knew that in soul they were a thousand times the better. With a zealous furiosity our pious band of heroes courageously charged into the mists of the opposing horde who were met with holy uppercuts and kicks. Our resident illustrator has compiled a “motion picture”. Please flip the pages in rapid succession to view the battle in lifelike detail! The unholy were expelled in no time at all! The men, bloody and bruised, came out victorious with a smile and thanked God for guiding their righteous punches. Surely this astounding victory has demonstrated the ever increasing favor of the Divine! Scholars theorize that these winds of change must mean that the Messiah will soon be discovered! Oh Lord God, bring the cowards before me. And let my fist project your fury.
  7. CANONS REGULAR OF THE COLOSSUS SAINT HUMBERT OF BAR Canonici Regulares Colossi S. Humbert de Bar TABLE OF CONTENTS SECTION I - ESTABLISHMENT SECTION II - QUERY SECTION III - JURISDICTION SECTION IV - THE SEVEN MAXIMS SECTION V - ACCESSION SECTION I FOR THE GLORY OF GOD, WHOM WE SERVE The Holy Mother Church, whom is tasked with spreading the word of our almighty creator; God. Must find itself in every crevice and corner of this land, a task given unto us payment and priests alike by our Holy Lord. So we must devote ourselves in whole, body and soul, entirely to the sake of the almighty Lord and his will. To give up our earthly gains, and undergo servitude to the will of our most merciful creator. That we do in earnest, to follow our most holy Lord’s will, establish the Canons Regular of the “Colossus” Saint Humbert of Bar peace and blessings eternally upon his name. The same St. Humbert, the titan of faith, whom so humbly gave upon his noble heritage to undertake his Lord’s will. The same Saint Humbert, patron saint of regents, who persevered in Saint Daniel’s absence defended the faith during the schism war. It is the same Saint. Humbert, the colossus of Bar, who defied this world’s whims, glory, and desires giving himself whole to his most holy Lord’s will. It is his footsteps we seek to follow, a giant of the faith whose life and actions carry us ever-forward. For our Lord in heaven, we seek to give our life wholly for the next. May we defy against the evils and delusions of this life as Saint Humbert had, may his will be inherited in us humble slaves of the lord. SECTION II FOR QUERYING FAITHFUL The establishment of our most faithful order, of the Canons Regular, has been fulfilled by our most faithful leader Lucien. A humble man of no nobility, who has found himself set on a mission by our most divine lord God. As an agent of the faith, he has found it upon himself to begin this order, so he may fulfill the task given unto him by the divine. Upon a night not too long ago, a spiritual vision was bestowed unto our founder. A divine charisma for which has given a man of no standing, a distinct and holy purpose giving unto him the will of zealots before him. We seek not to imitate prior monastic orders, nor militant orders of which mask the faith from the ordinary laymen. Those same laymen, who share the innate belief of God, though ignorant, follow his message and the path of which they know. The Canons Regular is not constituted solely by religious clerics of the holy mother church, as it is not the same church that exists in the layman’s life solely. Canons Regular is destined to those works while relating to the divine in every aspect of their lives, whereas it is not so with the monastic orders who remove themselves from the laymen and clerics alike; Who consider themselves dedicated wholly to God, yet choose not to share our Lord’s embrace past themselves; And for those militants, who in ignorance and hubris fight in the name of the faith, but without shame claim and plunder for their worldly desires. This is what distinguishes a Canon Regular from the faith militant, clerics, or a monk; He shall be a median point from extremes and shall embody the will of our Lord in every aspect of his life. He shall not stand idle as our faith under each generation whisps away. The Canon Regular will work tirelessly, as St. Humbert did in the Pontiff Daniel’s absence, in every way to uphold his faith and his Lord’s will. May we act as mere instruments of our Lord, through every action in our lives. For the laymen who smiths and wages away, his labor and devotion, let it be an act of God. For the militant who fights for a secular lord, let his fight be for martyrdom and an act of God. And let the monastic who has embraced asceticism find means to further our Lord’s will to others as he found it. Let the cleric who studies in the name of the church, further his Lord's will to the laity as an act of god. SECTION III JURISDICTION Under our founder, Cardinal Jonathan, the Canons Regular of the Colossus Saint Humbert of Bar reside and maintain the church of Adria. We are maintained by our humble faithful, under the authority of Jonathan, kept beneath the ultimate command of our most blessed Lord God in keeping his holy law and rule intact. As with not only the church square, but our jurisdiction in ecclesial matters spans to the whole of the duchy. For our founder Jonathan, shepherds as the Cardinal of the Archdiocese of Aboa. Of which encompasses wholly the lands surrounding and under the free duchy of Adria, including those minor forts & farms, from the soil to the sky. SECTION IV THE SEVEN HEAVENLY MAXIMS The seven heavenly maxims, that our so divinely inspired founder was gifted with. From which we use as our most basic principles of logic, reason, and intuition in how we may perform our duties to the lord. 1. Work diligently in your calling, so you may shun the ambitions of this world for the next 2. Woe to the cunning wordsmith who sputters strife, let us be forward in our speech 3. Be moderate and economical, make not waste of which the lord and has given to you 4. Cultivate peace with your neighbor so you may prevent quarrels and lawsuits 5. Give high esteem to filial piety and brotherly submission, for the sake of our most gracious lord 6. Wipe out strange beliefs so we may elevate the correct doctrine 7. Elucidate the laws in order to warn the ignorant and obstinate SECTION V ACCESSION For those faithful who seek further knowledge of our order, who seek to embody the will of our most holy lord, and follow the path of the blessed St. Humbert; may they find us at Adria upon the church square. PRAISE BE TO OUR LORD GOD BLESSED BE ST. HUMBERT, FOREVER MAY HIS NAME BE REVERED OOC https://discord.gg/FXFMVKeQYf fluffy#7461
  8. :---------------------------------------------------------------------)
  9. fluffycop

    Fluffycop

    Ivan was born into a Highlander family in a village in the domain of the Holy Orenian Empire. At 2 years old, he, along with his mother and father, would move to the new realm, Atlas. There, they would settle as farmers in the Empire of Man. For a large part of his childhood, Ivan and his family would settle in a small village as farmers. By the time Ivan was 19, he was ready to take over the farm his parents had worked for his entire childhood. He would stay in his own village, secluded from the bigger world, until, just days after his 20th birthday, raiders came to sack his village. Ivan was powerless to defend himself against them and they slaughtered his entire family. Having nothing left at the village, Ivan traveled to Carolustadt to apply his efforts elsewhere. In the capital of the Empire of Man, he was able to find an apprenticeship under a merchant, where he stayed and learned for 3 years before venturing out into the city to live on his own. He currently works as a merchant, just barely getting by through selling and trading whatever he can get his hands on.
×
×
  • Create New...