Josie_Exotic

[!] A new poster is tacked upon the Dunwen notice board. Urgent notice for all wee to exercise their wee rights! You have the right to choose who leads your government! Nominate a new Thain today! Despite the pressing circumstances, the wee folk of Dúnwen must not forget our civic duty. It has yet again come time to elect a new thain! Once elected, a new Thain will be responsible for tending to the problems experienced by wee far and wide. A proper candidate for Thain will have a strong zest for wee life, a determination to confront oppression at the hands of bigguns, and a tuft of hair atop their feet. Baldies need not apply. In the ballot box below, please drop any nominations for the wee that you think best fits! [!] Below the poster sits a ballot box and a stack of empty papers. (( Elections will be posted with nominations 24 hours after this post. ))

Sheriff Election voting form: (IGN): josie_exotic Name (RP): Jolene Peregrin Age: Old enough to know better Race: I didn't know other races could vote. WEE Who you're voting for: Spuds[] | Capt'n Took[X] Jo drunkenly stumbles across the ballot box. "Don't moind if ah do," she hums, grabbing a ballot. She jots down a few sentences, shaking her head, "Ah didn' think this needed ter be clarified." The wee lass drops the ballot in the box and stumbles off, flask in hand.

WEE DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH AND SAFETY ANNUAL INSPECTION REPORT Two health inspectors travelled across biggun realms to ensure compliance with the strict wee health codes. Health codes exist to prevent the spread of disease and miasma. Published here are the findings of our wee inspectors. Please consider these findings when drinking at your next local tavern. RANKING SYSTEM W- Wee Approved A- Absolutely Spotless B- Biggun Worthy C- Crusty D- Don't Go Here F- FILTHY HEALTH CODES AND REGULATIONS ARE AS FOLLOWS 1. CRITTERS- ESTABLISHMENTS SHOULD BE FREE OF ALL LIVESTOCK AND INFESTATION. IF ANIMALS (barring bigguns) ARE TO BE FOUND IN AN ESTABLISHMENT, MEASURES SHOULD BE TAKEN TO RID THEM TO COMPLY WITH HEALTH AND SAFETY REGULATION. 2. GENERAL CLEANLINESS A. DRINKS AND FOOD SHOULD BE PROPERLY STORED. FOOD SHOULD NOT BE LEFT OUT UNCOVERED OR IT MAY GO STALE AND YUCKY. FOOD LEFT OUT IN TAVERNS ATTRACTS CRITTERS AND CONTRIBUTES TO A LASTING MIASMA THAT WILL CAUSE DISEASE. B. COBWEBS AND DUST SHOULD BE ELIMINATED TO AVOID THE CLOGGED AIRWAYS AND POTENTIAL ILLNESS OF PATRONS. C. MEATS SHOULD BE STORED IN A FREEZER TO ELIMINATE POTENTIAL MIASMA. MEAT IS PARTICULARLY SUSCEPTIBLE TO MIASMA, WHICH MAY SPREAD FASTER IN WARM AIR. D. COUNTERS, TABLES, AND ALL OTHER SURFACES SHOULD BE WIPED CLEAN. DIRTY TABLES ARE YUCKY. 3. FIRE SAFETY A. FIREPLACES SHOULD HAVE AN AIR VENT TO ELIMINATE SMOKE WITHIN AN ESTABLISHMENT. B. TO PREVENT FIRESPREAD, FIREPLACES SHOULD BE WELL SURROUNDED WITH FIRE-PROOF MATERIALS (NOT WOOD.) 4. PLANTS A. PLANTS SHOULD BE CONTAINED IN POTS TO PREVENT BUG INFESTATION. B. PLANTS THAT PRODUCE EXCESSIVE POLLEN SHOULD BE REMOVED. Health inspectors reserve the right to add additional point eliminations based on extenuating circumstances. Any establishment that has been ranked has been entitled to a posted sign, if so desired. HEALTH INSPECTION REPORTS The Fairweather Pub OLD Haense Tavern- SHUT DOWN DUE TO POOR HEALTH RATING The Tipsy Tarchar (NEW "IMPROVED" AFTER SHUTDOWN) Da Hungry Howler The Bouncing Bokolo The Watanabe Teahouse Paddy's Pyre The Drunker Delver Malna's Mayhem The Grub Bucket Amathine Tavern WARNING THE FOLLOWING CONTENT DEPICTS NUMEROUS WEE RIGHTS VIOLATIONS. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION. Norland Tavern Haulun'or Tavern Due to the necessity of health and safety throughout the realms, the Wee Department of Health and Safety is willing to re-review any tavern that expresses willing improvement. For a second chance, please contact Phineas Overhill-Weedsnatcher ((Hnan_T)) or Jo Peregrin ((josie_exotic)). Documentation of Jerry has been passed to the Wee Bureau of Investigations and will be handled promptly. If you or a friend have any information about the wee fellow, please alert your nearest Halfling Authorities.

Who is your favorite U.S. president (alive or dead)?

[!] A formal letter is stapled to the bulletin board. The edges of the thick paper are neatly scalloped and have been carefully decorated with flowers and lace. (( See https://gyazo.com/ea456ef5646f8d9ffe8731dd90070272 )) It is with great pleasure that I invite you all to the event of the season. A grand dinner party will be hosted at the Peregrin estate. May all halflings come to enjoy a carefully curated 5-course meal experience, complete with drink, music, and laughter. The dinner will begin in the afternoon ((3 PM EST)) on the upcoming Wee Tuesday ((March 5)) and will carry on well into the evening hours. Please arrive in your best formal attire and leave shovels at the door. Each course will be paired with a wine/ale/Peregrin lemonade! Bigguns are "welcome" to attend as servers and busboys. All bigguns worth their tremendous weight will be compensated with a meal and a bottle of ale, ((All are welcome. Feel free to pop in the burrow any time between 3 PM and 6 PM EST)) Signed, Jo Peregrin

Jo encounters the article somehow, her brows furrowing as she scans the page. "Ah, I know ah use fer this," she nods and shuffles out of her burrow and towards the village outhouse, paper in hand.

A sleeping Onelia lays in a flowerbed, flask in hand and drool trailing down the side of her cheek. A pamphlet flutters in the wind, landing open on the wee lass' face. She jumps up, flailing in a sort of fighting response before catching the pamphlet and pulling it open in front of her. She grunts, her slanted gaze trailing across the paper, "Some wee folk ough' ter be pu' downnn..." she groans before crumpling the paper up and clumsily moving to her feet. "Ah can't 'ave 'is trash litterin' me garden," she lazily grumbles, taking a swig from her flask before turning to stumble through the doorway of her burrow, where it can be presumed that she would throw the trash writing into her fireplace.

[!] A new flyer hangs across the noticeboard, a poll box nailed neatly below. Nominate -Knoxville's- First Sheriff! With Knoxville's new boom in population, I find myself unable to keep up with the growing rate of crime. Nominate a sheriff, today, who will enforce the laws of Knoxville, moderate shogging tournaments, and keep a select few wee criminals from messing my lawn. The responsibilities are as follows: - Enforces the laws of Knoxville in a peaceful, non-biggun way. The wee way. - Follows the laws of Knoxville without fail - Works with the mayor to devise re-education curriculum - Arranges a jury for any wee folk requesting trial - Is a proper wee person with outstanding respect for my lawn Please drop any and all nominations in the box below. With appreciation for the folks that have built this village, Signed, (( Please have all nominations in by the end of June 10th ))

Knoxville Laws Notice: Failure to abide by these laws may result in consequences including, but not limited to, jail time, community service, or even public shaming. 1. Biggun weapons are strictly forbidden unless they are used for day to day tasks, such as cooking or building, and not ever used in a violent manner. Shovels are allowed, as they do not carry a history of biggun violence. 2. Stealing from other members of the community is not allowed. 3. No locks on doors or chests. Our community is built off of trust between neighbors. 4. It is mandatory for wee folk to bathe at LEAST once a week. If your neighbors can smell you, it's time for a bath. 5. Bigguns may not acquire a home in the village. The village is for the wee. 6. Murder is strictly forbidden amongst ALL individuals. 7. Assault is forbidden unless used in defense of a biggun. 8. Trial will be held for any wee criminal that feels they have been wrongly accused. 9. A mayor will act as the figurehead for Knoxville happenings and will be elected once every 8 years ((2 months)). Mayors are not all-powerful and are implemented specifically to deal with foreign relations and to uphold the standards set forth in this list. 10. A sheriff will be elected once every 8 years alongside the mayor. Sheriffs are the leaders of the sheriff department and act solely to enforce these laws. 11. Mina must never be used in the village. 12. Improper wee folk will not be tolerated. Impropers will either be shunned or re-educated to better integrate into halfling society. Improper behaviors include wearing shoes, living with bigguns, carrying biggun weapons, using mina in or outside of the village, and disobeying the law. 13. Change must never, under any circumstance, be acceptable. A drawing, for the wee folk who cannot read. https://imgur.com/a/WZmZh44

(( "This was only made worse by Onelia’s pro-Haelun’or stance. For as much as she disliked bigguns, she didn’t seem to have any problem with hopping into Haelun’or’s pocket." Any Haelun'or RP I had at that time was voided other than one meeting Onelia and Kerra had, where she told them she didn't need biggun help. Onelia dislikes all bigguns and never blatantly said anything about Haelun'or to you or the other halflings. I did say things OOCly about land offers if that's what you're talking about? This seems kind of like meta-game and I'd appreciate that you edited it or at least quoted the RP that gave Greta this impression. :) Thanks. ))

{ Fire Department Application } ((MC Name: josie_exotic)) Name: Onelia Peregrin Age: 60 Mailing Address: 1 Cherry Lane Why do you want to be on the Fire Department?: I would like to join the Fire Department to keep our grass green and untouched by fire. Any other comments?: I've seen some fire safety violations throughout the village that may be worth addressing.

[!] A new poster is pasted across the village noticeboard, announcing that there is a new fire chief in town. OFFICIAL ~FIRE CHIEF~ PERRY OVERHILL 1815 It is with great honor that I announce that the winner of the fire chief elections is none other than Mister Perry Overhill. From here on out, the fire chief elections will be held immediately after the announcement of the new elders, as not to interfere with the elder elections. Along with this, in the future elections, polls will be open for 2 elven days before the announcement of a new fire chief. Anybody who wishes to apply for a position on the fire department is welcome to fill out an application and place it in the fire department mail box! { Fire Department Application } ((MC Name: )) Name: Age: Mailing Address: Why do you want to be on the Fire Department?: Any other comments?: Mister Overhill will now be in charge of accepting and arranging the positions on the fire department. May he achieve great success with this new position. Signed, ((Respond to this post with Fire Department applications and I'll force ChefMiguel (Perry) to look at it!))