11 Year AMA

[ydegirl 1827]

why

[Zarsies 6115]

10 hours ago, Werew0lf said:

where do you normally sit in your house when u wanna chill and write lore

 

what is ur current favourite CA / MA or one you can tolerate at the moment (cant say bloodmagic or seer cus u wrote them) 

 

what is ur least favourite CA / MA at the moment

 

do you like how the server is currently functioning in terms of roleplay n stories n narratives (me: no)

thx

 

My new house is giant and I have the master so the space is just unreasonably large, I need things to fill it with, but atm I have a 7ft couch against one wall centered under a window. It has a yellow and cream floral print with yellow grapes, oranges, and some kind of yellow-orange bird all over. It's from the early 70s and is in pristine condition, I got it from a friend's late grandmother who kept it in her living room for my friend's parent's entire life but no one was allowed to sit on it. It was the "nice" couch, the couch for guests only, so the family had to clean it but could never use it and due to their situation they had less and less people over until for ~25 years it was completely unused but still taken care of. I'm obsessed with this stupid couch and it's where I sit/lay with my laptop to chip away at projects. Lovely spot.

 

I've always loved Afflicted, shame it's in limbo currently. I really enjoy the idea of skinwalkers / dopplegangers (one of my very few fears, movies that feature dopplegangers make me squirm) and playing one is a blast. If that doesn't count I'd say vivification, it's what you make of it.

 

Least liked are anthroparions and shamanism.

 

Decent enough. Over the years LotC has grown in ways it's hard to describe other than server culture and attitudes, in other ways it's always been the same and it's not a simple topic to lay out. It's always a problem getting people to 'buy-in' to the stories of others, be it consenting to death or just accepting a tone/mood/atmosphere. Plenty of players don't care about verisimilitude and another player infringing on their slim-thick-witty-handsome-knights-watch-detective RP triggers bad sportsmanship and that's a bummer. Or when violence isn't treated as terrifying, life threatening, and a last resort like we're in an anime and people lay down their lives for little to no reason just because. Those issues are never fixed, it's a matter of player temperament and server culture, but at times they get better or worse. I'm thankful RP default is back but it's just one step, the server at large is always in need of education and examples but those two things don't come easily from what I can tell. To answer, yes I do like it, but only because I curate my surroundings and hide from the general public lest I encounter the aforementioned types. But I'm going to try my best relatively soon to find new people, make new friends, and get out of my shell.

 

6 hours ago, Angmarzku said:

I do miss Kozilek and the first Synod, Ghamul too. Do you ever think about the character and the past? And how the spooks were back then? After all these damnable years, why do you still remain? When do I get my Wraiths back? Mordring time?

 

Not often; I'm nostalgic for almost nothing. I remain because I can maintain a golden ratio of time invested to fun and pleasure received, what amounts to maybe 4 hours a week right now but I'd like to get more towards ~8 due to character aspirations. I doubt wraiths will ever be back for player use unless the writers overhaul their concept because of how LotC had changed (grown) and the old stuff wouldn't fly nowadays. Mordring is near.

 

5 hours ago, fugaces said:

why

 

Just a silly thing for goofy gals. 

[TheBigBubbles 738]

What are some of the things you look for in a person who you'd befriend?

 

How exactly do you reach any kind of balance ever? My life is like, shifting from extreme to extreme, project to project and throwing my everything at it. How do you get out of that habit?

 

How do you learn to feel confident in your own achievements and works and rely on the praise of others less?
 

What's a must read book for you?

[Xx_BloodStalk_xX 2173]

- Your least played race, and your most played race.
- Out of the four main races which culture interests you the most.

- Another LOTCer whose writing you enjoy consistently.
- If you could start fresh on the server, would you do things differently or still play the same sort of aesthetic you play now? 
- Does RP help you relax, or is it just a hobby?
- Thoughts on me?
- Favorite thing you're reading ATM

[kingnothing 564]

i love you

[Zarsies 6115]

6 hours ago, TheBigBubbles said:

What are some of the things you look for in a person who you'd befriend?

 

How exactly do you reach any kind of balance ever? My life is like, shifting from extreme to extreme, project to project and throwing my everything at it. How do you get out of that habit?

 

How do you learn to feel confident in your own achievements and works and rely on the praise of others less?
 

What's a must read book for you?

 

Empathy, maturity, independence, patience, humility, etc. Nothing special.

 

CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) and a moderate amount of psychedelics. It's too large a subject to succinctly broach here but TL;DR determine what you genuinely care about - usually people or internal values - and let the rest fall away. Not everything is serious; in fact very little is. Once you lose perpetual tension life is easier. Also helps to get evaluated for any neurodivergent qualities you might have and seek treatment if you haven't before.

 

See above. I gutted all need for validation when I came to terms with nihilism; no one and nothing matters, enjoy yourself. Seek therapy if needed.

 

Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse, 1922. It's so old it's in the public domain and you can find free narrations of it.

 

3 hours ago, Xx_BloodStalk_xX said:

- Your least played race, and your most played race.
- Out of the four main races which culture interests you the most.

- Another LOTCer whose writing you enjoy consistently.
- If you could start fresh on the server, would you do things differently or still play the same sort of aesthetic you play now? 
- Does RP help you relax, or is it just a hobby?
- Thoughts on me?
- Favorite thing you're reading ATM

 

Least played: dwarf and orc (2). Most played: human and elf (each 3). Longest played in terms of IRL time is probably elf, my first 2 main characters were dark elves.

 

N/A. Culture is a joke on the races as a whole, it's only of any depth in specific pockets but even then I'm neutral on almost all. Best specific culture imo were the Velians.

 

Implying I even like my own consistently Q_Q Probably simonbane but they haven't been around since ~2014 so... idk.

 

I don't play any aesthetic because every character evolves from one to another until they die in one unless you consider mentally ill an aesthetic. But who isn't ill in some manner and what fun would a world of benign 'normal' people be? As for starting over it's hard to say, my path was foundational and taught me a lot via mistake and looking back on it all I want to shrivel up and die but it was necessary to become who I am today. I'd probably axe most of Sprat, redact Uldrivt's origin, kill off Carmanin instead of letting her fade, and spend less time at my computer in general. I used LotC as an escape and at times I should have challenged myself more instead of hiding from the world in fantasyland. I'd also play a halfling main but avoid the anal hugbox crowd.

 

Just a hobby that I'm hot and cold on at times. Sometimes - more often than it should be - it's daunting and acutely stressful so I don't even attempt to engage. I've been more absent in-game 2018 to now compared to 2013 to 2017 accounting for school and unhealthy devotion. My dissatisfaction with my own roleplay, the roleplay of others, and other people's typing speed / inability to resolve interactions in a timely manner eats at me and makes me hesitant dive in. The best way I've learned to mitigate this stress and try to enjoy RP has been curating my company and spending less time in public areas which slowly became none. That led to feeling trapped in a sense that my characters have a very short list of immediate contacts and outside them they are isolated which translates to me not staying online. Not great, and I've learned there's a balance in curating who I interact with and spending time encountering strangers but since I've been away so much I've yet to start that initiative. Hopefully I will soon.

 

My thoughts are shallow because our encounters have been fleeting but they amount to me thinking you're an excited, appropriately immature dude on a path to success.

 

Terry Jones' Medieval Lives by Terry Jones, 2004. It's proven invaluable for establishing realism as a I prep for my next D&D campaign.

 

10 minutes ago, kingnothing said:

i love you

 

You're a real one, my dude.

[The King Of The Moon 5412]

ok first question:

How dare you?

[Zarsies 6115]

8 hours ago, The King Of The Moon said:

ok first question:

How dare you?

 

I'm on my ambitious divorcee arc.

[Harold 3246]

old heads never die

[Ibn Khaldun 7754]

On 6/28/2022 at 12:42 PM, Zarsies said:

 

Empathy, maturity, independence, patience, humility, etc. Nothing special.

 

CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) and a moderate amount of psychedelics. It's too large a subject to succinctly broach here but TL;DR determine what you genuinely care about - usually people or internal values - and let the rest fall away. Not everything is serious; in fact very little is. Once you lose perpetual tension life is easier. Also helps to get evaluated for any neurodivergent qualities you might have and seek treatment if you haven't before.

 

See above. I gutted all need for validation when I came to terms with nihilism; no one and nothing matters, enjoy yourself. Seek therapy if needed.

 

Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse, 1922. It's so old it's in the public domain and you can find free narrations of it.

 

 

Least played: dwarf and orc (2). Most played: human and elf (each 3). Longest played in terms of IRL time is probably elf, my first 2 main characters were dark elves.

 

N/A. Culture is a joke on the races as a whole, it's only of any depth in specific pockets but even then I'm neutral on almost all. Best specific culture imo were the Velians.

 

Implying I even like my own consistently Q_Q Probably simonbane but they haven't been around since ~2014 so... idk.

 

I don't play any aesthetic because every character evolves from one to another until they die in one unless you consider mentally ill an aesthetic. But who isn't ill in some manner and what fun would a world of benign 'normal' people be? As for starting over it's hard to say, my path was foundational and taught me a lot via mistake and looking back on it all I want to shrivel up and die but it was necessary to become who I am today. I'd probably axe most of Sprat, redact Uldrivt's origin, kill off Carmanin instead of letting her fade, and spend less time at my computer in general. I used LotC as an escape and at times I should have challenged myself more instead of hiding from the world in fantasyland. I'd also play a halfling main but avoid the anal hugbox crowd.

 

Just a hobby that I'm hot and cold on at times. Sometimes - more often than it should be - it's daunting and acutely stressful so I don't even attempt to engage. I've been more absent in-game 2018 to now compared to 2013 to 2017 accounting for school and unhealthy devotion. My dissatisfaction with my own roleplay, the roleplay of others, and other people's typing speed / inability to resolve interactions in a timely manner eats at me and makes me hesitant dive in. The best way I've learned to mitigate this stress and try to enjoy RP has been curating my company and spending less time in public areas which slowly became none. That led to feeling trapped in a sense that my characters have a very short list of immediate contacts and outside them they are isolated which translates to me not staying online. Not great, and I've learned there's a balance in curating who I interact with and spending time encountering strangers but since I've been away so much I've yet to start that initiative. Hopefully I will soon.

 

My thoughts are shallow because our encounters have been fleeting but they amount to me thinking you're an excited, appropriately immature dude on a path to success.

 

Terry Jones' Medieval Lives by Terry Jones, 2004. It's proven invaluable for establishing realism as a I prep for my next D&D campaign.

 

 

You're a real one, my dude.

 

I see I have a fellow Hermann Hesse appreciator. Narcissus & Goldmund for me mate.

[excited 10836]

On 6/28/2022 at 9:42 AM, Zarsies said:

 

Empathy, maturity, independence, patience, humility, etc. Nothing special.

 

CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) and a moderate amount of psychedelics. It's too large a subject to succinctly broach here but TL;DR determine what you genuinely care about - usually people or internal values - and let the rest fall away. Not everything is serious; in fact very little is. Once you lose perpetual tension life is easier. Also helps to get evaluated for any neurodivergent qualities you might have and seek treatment if you haven't before.

 

See above. I gutted all need for validation when I came to terms with nihilism; no one and nothing matters, enjoy yourself. Seek therapy if needed.

 

Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse, 1922. It's so old it's in the public domain and you can find free narrations of it.

 

 

Least played: dwarf and orc (2). Most played: human and elf (each 3). Longest played in terms of IRL time is probably elf, my first 2 main characters were dark elves.

 

N/A. Culture is a joke on the races as a whole, it's only of any depth in specific pockets but even then I'm neutral on almost all. Best specific culture imo were the Velians.

 

Implying I even like my own consistently Q_Q Probably simonbane but they haven't been around since ~2014 so... idk.

 

I don't play any aesthetic because every character evolves from one to another until they die in one unless you consider mentally ill an aesthetic. But who isn't ill in some manner and what fun would a world of benign 'normal' people be? As for starting over it's hard to say, my path was foundational and taught me a lot via mistake and looking back on it all I want to shrivel up and die but it was necessary to become who I am today. I'd probably axe most of Sprat, redact Uldrivt's origin, kill off Carmanin instead of letting her fade, and spend less time at my computer in general. I used LotC as an escape and at times I should have challenged myself more instead of hiding from the world in fantasyland. I'd also play a halfling main but avoid the anal hugbox crowd.

 

Just a hobby that I'm hot and cold on at times. Sometimes - more often than it should be - it's daunting and acutely stressful so I don't even attempt to engage. I've been more absent in-game 2018 to now compared to 2013 to 2017 accounting for school and unhealthy devotion. My dissatisfaction with my own roleplay, the roleplay of others, and other people's typing speed / inability to resolve interactions in a timely manner eats at me and makes me hesitant dive in. The best way I've learned to mitigate this stress and try to enjoy RP has been curating my company and spending less time in public areas which slowly became none. That led to feeling trapped in a sense that my characters have a very short list of immediate contacts and outside them they are isolated which translates to me not staying online. Not great, and I've learned there's a balance in curating who I interact with and spending time encountering strangers but since I've been away so much I've yet to start that initiative. Hopefully I will soon.

 

My thoughts are shallow because our encounters have been fleeting but they amount to me thinking you're an excited, appropriately immature dude on a path to success.

 

Terry Jones' Medieval Lives by Terry Jones, 2004. It's proven invaluable for establishing realism as a I prep for my next D&D campaign.

 

 

You're a real one, my dude.

 

that's not true because you're friends with me

 

caught lacking, zarsies