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The Goats are FIsh?


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The Goats are Fish?

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A depiction of the Sedanites swimming away from the ISA & Rangers.

 

Let it be known that on this day, the 15th Tobias’ Bounty the traitorous Sedanites stormed Southbridge with the intent of recruiting innocents for their failing insurrection. It seems that they do not have enough members for their plans so they have resorted to attempting to recruit women, children, and other confused individuals. As these traitors attempted to recruit a young Dharas  into their ranks, a brave Tatyana Barbanov sent a bird to her husband, Prince Nikolas - a Ranger Leader who was in a meeting with the Emperor at the time.

 

Once Prince Nikolas explained the letter to the Emperor, he was dismissed to dispatch the threat with the assistance of some ISA soldiers. As soon as the ISA arrived at Southbridge the traitorous Sedanites quickly fled, soon leaving their horses to drown in the river as they swam to safety. This can only raise a singular question, are these people truly traitorous ‘goats’, or are they flimsy fish?

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Deputy Tatyana Barbanov commends her brave new soldier, Dharas on the great skill displayed when the cowardly goats appeared at their encampment. She nudged him with an elbow, passing over a bottle of The Reckless Ranger™, and clinking her own with his in cheers. "You'll prove to be a fine Ranger, sir. A great pleasure to work with you. What a first impression!"

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*Leo would smirk* "It was an easy win as per usual"

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Captain Ruthern shakes his head, "How brave of them to swim away after talking so much about their skills to a new recruit."

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Ezyl simply smiles, relaxing in the Orenian tavern. "I was right about the de Joannes all those years ago after all. A shame they've scared off the fish though, guess I can't try out being a fisherman now." 

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“Did’a someone say’a fish?! Tim’a for’a dinna!” Lorenzo the Halfling Serial Toilet Clogger exclaims, taking out his fishing rod to go fish for some Sedanites.

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Beryl Jasper Carrington would chuckle idly at the paper, and nod "Ah, well that's that then- I suppose they're indeed fish." The Rheynari would remark as he set out on another one of his peculiar journeys to the North once more, humming his merry tune to himself "Hmm-Hm...Hmmm-Hmm-Hmmm..."

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Major Othaman chuckles as he hears of the news.

 

"These fools really wish to keep this up? Two engagements lost and they choose to swim away in terror. God help them, for they shall need it."

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Lieutenant Colonel William Darkwood would read upon the missive "What a question indeed, they claim to be goats, but they flee like brainless fish, I do wonder are they the thing they truly claim? Are they grass eating mammals or fish, or maybe, maybe they are some weird hybrid between the two, I do wonder..." He would note to a few comrades "Or maybe if goats fear their lives they run towards water and imitate fish as camouflage?"

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"Only natural, that they who need to bring overwhelming numbers to even try and match our soldiers falter when they are met with might," says Franz, taking pride in the work of the Imperial soldiers.

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‘’A great day of victories for the Empire against the flimsy fish!’’ Comments a hungry Niko after a long day of fighting.

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"Oren just needs to crawl up and die, it has stupid decisions but it just won't DIE!" Says a High Elf with splishy splashy magic.

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