Hog in the Water

[BobBox 3798]

Spoiler

 

Hog In The Water

 

It was the 5th of Horen’s Calling - a bright and sunny day in the Empire when twelve brave troops trudged into the sunless land of the Nordlings. Once they arrived, two brave troops of the Empire volunteered to go forward and investigate the wall - Count Iskander Basrid and a soldier by the name of John Smith. As one of the two was spotted, two unthinking Norlandic barbarians dropped from their walls and gave chase.

 

After the blind and idiotic chase had stopped, the two Nordlings looked around in fear as they realized they were alone in the hellscape of woods that they called their home. It was but moments after such a realization happened that one was cut down and another was captured, a purifier in the government by the name of Thorfinn Kursin.

 

As the two soldiers hauled the man towards Oren, he suddenly awoke and jumped into the bottom of the river, foolishly thinking he could swim with his barbarian strength. Sadly for him, this was not the case, as he soon drowned as his armor weighed him down. 

 

Let this be a reminder to all the Nordling barbarians that taking but a step outside of your gates is dangerous and that nowhere within your territory is safe.

 

[𝖂𝖆𝖌𝖜𝖆𝖓 740]

Captain Robert Archibald Galbraith would raise his rock glass of Adunian whisky swirling it slightly before moving to take a sip "Spiffing, I almost feel bad for him."

[Jokinghills 825]

General William Darkwood would read the missive an note to fellow soldiers "These Barbarians dont realize that you cant swim if you are tied, true fools"

[KBR 2046]

Major Iskander Basrid signed the Lorraine once for the captured man who threw himself from the boat. 

 

[Shmeepicus 4213]

Caspian sat in the Novellen, enjoying a much needed break when he saw the group return. He raised a glass to them and called down to the soldiery. "A job well done then, as I've heard."

[valecu 2128]

Valent smiled the Sun's Smile. 

[Taketheshot 3834]

Joseph smirks with a large grin as he reads the letter offering a chuckle. "One of two things is happening here, either Norland cannot protect their own high value targets....or they offer titles and ranks to any poor fool who will support their burning bush." He files the letter away for later offering another hearty laugh. 

[Crevel 7557]

Spoiler

 

[grnappa 1230]

Sir Erik Othaman nodded his head as he leaned back in his chair, a wide smile shooting across his face.

"Such is the fate that befalls though who declare war against the Holy Orenian Empire. We gave them an overwhelming amount of chances to surrender and they have failed to respond. Ironically, the option for peace now rests in the hands of the man who started this war: the chieftain of Norland. What shall it be?"

"We asked for peace."

[growingivy 3382]

A certain political invested woman whispered something. "Kursin... where've I heard that before." Athri blinked, realizing where she knew it from a moment after. "Elizabeth's son?" She could only vaguely remember her old friend, but remembered nonetheless.

[Da_Emperors 1987]

Archchancellor Ledicort d’Azor would remain seated in the War Office as he would hold a Carrington & Company Cigar with his left hand. His eyes would look to the clock and then to the table — tapping his fingers against the table as he awaited. When the cheers began outside of walls for the return of the victorious soldiers he would offer a light smile to those around him in the room.

 

”Another one bites the dust.” 

[bugbytes21 790]

Garret Darkwood now chuckles "So now the Norlanders think they can be fish now! Barbarians don't have gills" 

 

 

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

[Sham404 518]

Edric wonders, why did the Orenian raiding force run away as soon as they caught sight of him.

[Sevastiel 285]

From beyond the veil, a silver figure finds himself in awe at yet another war to prove nothing at all, save pride and face.

 

Someday, the Oreners would be willing to simply put down their mirrors and use their words, that no such back and forth calamities would need to happen any longer. 

[jdesarno 381]

"Nugget does not see the point in skinny wig men 'flexing' about person drowning when wig men spent whole hour fleeing 'barburians'" Nugget shrugged, several watermelon corpses lie dormant around the visibly soaked anvil, the executioner of many  liars.

 

Nugget scooped up the remains of his fruity labors and deposited them into his llama pen, "Nugget finds no amusement in falseness"