Josie_Exotic

WEE DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH AND SAFETY ANNUAL INSPECTION REPORT Two health inspectors travelled across biggun realms to ensure compliance with the strict wee health codes. Health codes exist to prevent the spread of disease and miasma. Published here are the findings of our wee inspectors. Please consider these findings when drinking at your next local tavern. RANKING SYSTEM W- Wee Approved A- Absolutely Spotless B- Biggun Worthy C- Crusty D- Don't Go Here F- FILTHY HEALTH CODES AND REGULATIONS ARE AS FOLLOWS 1. CRITTERS- ESTABLISHMENTS SHOULD BE FREE OF ALL LIVESTOCK AND INFESTATION. IF ANIMALS (barring bigguns) ARE TO BE FOUND IN AN ESTABLISHMENT, MEASURES SHOULD BE TAKEN TO RID THEM TO COMPLY WITH HEALTH AND SAFETY REGULATION. 2. GENERAL CLEANLINESS A. DRINKS AND FOOD SHOULD BE PROPERLY STORED. FOOD SHOULD NOT BE LEFT OUT UNCOVERED OR IT MAY GO STALE AND YUCKY. FOOD LEFT OUT IN TAVERNS ATTRACTS CRITTERS AND CONTRIBUTES TO A LASTING MIASMA THAT WILL CAUSE DISEASE. B. COBWEBS AND DUST SHOULD BE ELIMINATED TO AVOID THE CLOGGED AIRWAYS AND POTENTIAL ILLNESS OF PATRONS. C. MEATS SHOULD BE STORED IN A FREEZER TO ELIMINATE POTENTIAL MIASMA. MEAT IS PARTICULARLY SUSCEPTIBLE TO MIASMA, WHICH MAY SPREAD FASTER IN WARM AIR. D. COUNTERS, TABLES, AND ALL OTHER SURFACES SHOULD BE WIPED CLEAN. DIRTY TABLES ARE YUCKY. 3. FIRE SAFETY A. FIREPLACES SHOULD HAVE AN AIR VENT TO ELIMINATE SMOKE WITHIN AN ESTABLISHMENT. B. TO PREVENT FIRESPREAD, FIREPLACES SHOULD BE WELL SURROUNDED WITH FIRE-PROOF MATERIALS (NOT WOOD.) 4. PLANTS A. PLANTS SHOULD BE CONTAINED IN POTS TO PREVENT BUG INFESTATION. B. PLANTS THAT PRODUCE EXCESSIVE POLLEN SHOULD BE REMOVED. Health inspectors reserve the right to add additional point eliminations based on extenuating circumstances. Any establishment that has been ranked has been entitled to a posted sign, if so desired. HEALTH INSPECTION REPORTS The Fairweather Pub OLD Haense Tavern- SHUT DOWN DUE TO POOR HEALTH RATING The Tipsy Tarchar (NEW "IMPROVED" AFTER SHUTDOWN) Da Hungry Howler The Bouncing Bokolo The Watanabe Teahouse Paddy's Pyre The Drunker Delver Malna's Mayhem The Grub Bucket Amathine Tavern WARNING THE FOLLOWING CONTENT DEPICTS NUMEROUS WEE RIGHTS VIOLATIONS. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION. Norland Tavern Haulun'or Tavern Due to the necessity of health and safety throughout the realms, the Wee Department of Health and Safety is willing to re-review any tavern that expresses willing improvement. For a second chance, please contact Phineas Overhill-Weedsnatcher ((Hnan_T)) or Jo Peregrin ((josie_exotic)). Documentation of Jerry has been passed to the Wee Bureau of Investigations and will be handled promptly. If you or a friend have any information about the wee fellow, please alert your nearest Halfling Authorities.

Who is your favorite U.S. president (alive or dead)?

[!] A formal letter is stapled to the bulletin board. The edges of the thick paper are neatly scalloped and have been carefully decorated with flowers and lace. (( See https://gyazo.com/ea456ef5646f8d9ffe8731dd90070272 )) It is with great pleasure that I invite you all to the event of the season. A grand dinner party will be hosted at the Peregrin estate. May all halflings come to enjoy a carefully curated 5-course meal experience, complete with drink, music, and laughter. The dinner will begin in the afternoon ((3 PM EST)) on the upcoming Wee Tuesday ((March 5)) and will carry on well into the evening hours. Please arrive in your best formal attire and leave shovels at the door. Each course will be paired with a wine/ale/Peregrin lemonade! Bigguns are "welcome" to attend as servers and busboys. All bigguns worth their tremendous weight will be compensated with a meal and a bottle of ale, ((All are welcome. Feel free to pop in the burrow any time between 3 PM and 6 PM EST)) Signed, Jo Peregrin

Jo encounters the article somehow, her brows furrowing as she scans the page. "Ah, I know ah use fer this," she nods and shuffles out of her burrow and towards the village outhouse, paper in hand.